Threats, Refusals
and Ultimatums:
Dealing with
Hardball Negotiators
Stephen Boyle
Phillip Matthews
Programme Director
Director, Executive Education
UCD Smurfit School
UCD Smurfit School
Threats, Refusals
and Ultimatums:
Dealing with
Hardball Negotiators
Presenter:
Moderator:
Stephen Boyle
Phillip Matthews
AGENDA
• Threats and typical responses
• Assessing the threat
• Disarming threats
• Fighting back, surrendering
25 minutes
• Questions and Answers
15 minutes
Threats, refusals and ultimatums:
Tactics used by the other side
to take control of the negotiation
and force you to accept
their terms and conditions
at the expense of
your own interests
The desired
effect…
…And the typical responses
Surrender
Counter-threaten
BAR the threat
• Break
• Assess
• Respond
Assessing the threat
1. Will they follow through?
2. What are the consequences for you?
3. What caused the threat
– what are their underlying
concerns?
A better response
Surrender
Disarm and
Negotiate
Counter-threaten
Disarm and negotiate
Tips for disarming threats
• Treat the relationship as a partnership
• Understand what’s behind the threat
– what really matters to them
• Get all the issues on the table
– and keep them linked
• Know your facts in order to
disarm theirs
• Understand their alternatives
Essential DON’Ts!
•
•
•
•
Don’t try to negotiate unless you’re prepared!
Don’t become dependent on one customer
Don’t bluff – know the facts
Don’t whinge – take a problem-solving
approach
What if they won’t negotiate?
•
•
•
•
Ask why
Use active listening
Acknowledge their emotions
Make proposals and invite criticism
X
Fighting back
Tips for fighting back
• Say NO
• Stand up for your interests
• Be prepared to walk away
Manage the emotions
• Don’t counter-threaten
• Address the problem, not personal issues
• Allow your opponent to save face
Tactics for dealing with ultimatums
• Refuse to accept the ultimatum
– Keeps the negotiation moving
• Play for time
– Reduces the likelihood of the threat
being carried out
• Develop your alternatives
– Strengthens your ability
to resist
Surrendering
(when to do it, and what to do next)
Think twice about it!
• Do you really have little or no power?
– What’s your BATNA?
– Where does their power come from?
*BATNA = Best Alternative To Negotiated Agreement
When to surrender
• When you’ve exhausted all options for
improving the deal for both sides
AND
• When your BATNA (best alternative)
is worse than the offer
on the table
*BATNA = Best Alternative To Negotiated Agreement
After surrendering to a threat
• Figure out why you had to,
and remedy the situation
– Improve your alternatives
– Reduce your dependence
– Benchmark your offer
– Develop a partnership
approach
Final thoughts
• Threats can be self-invited:
Are you “needy” when you negotiate?
• Threats can be self-perpetuating:
Have you conceded to threats in the past?
Summary
Summary
• Avoid knee-jerk responses to threats
• Disarming your opponent should always
be your first option
– Change the nature of the negotiation
– Take the emotion out of the situation
• If you’ve got to fight it out, stand up for
your interests
Questions and Answers
‘Winning Negotiation Strategies’, a 2-day
training programme led by Stephen Boyle,
takes place on 24-25 February
Please contact Gillian Brown,
Programme Manager at (01) 716 8818
or email gillian.brown@ucd.ie