Breathing Life into Essays
(Persuasive)
Homework Packet
This is the rubric you will be graded on at the end of this unit.
1
Focus
Content
Organization
Style
Conventions
3
4
specific audience,
clear thesis
statement with a
point of view,
suggested by each
paragraph
specific audience,
clear thesis
statement,
proved by each
paragraph
three distinct
bullets,
in three paragraphs
supporting
evidence in each
three distinct
bullets,
in three
paragraphs
substantial
supporting
evidence in each
intro,
3 body,
call to action
transitional words
intro,
3 logically ordered
body,
call to action
transitional words,
oppositional
statements used
appropriately
basic and
ineffective
your word choice
sends mixed
messages
varied sentences,
appropriate word
choice
persuasive lingo
varied sentences,
appropriate word
choice
persuasive lingo,
all use to create a
specific tone
too confusing to
understand
mistakes that affect
meaning in:
grammar,
spelling,
punctuation,
complete sentences
three to six mistakes
that don't affect
meaning:
grammar,
spelling,
punctuation,
complete sentences
one or two mistakes
in:
grammar,
spelling,
punctuation,
complete sentences
you have no
thesis,
or no argument
less than two
distinct bullets
missing more than
one feature from
three column
2
no audience in
mind,
weak arguments
two distinct
bullets
missing one thing
from the three
column
Here is an example of what your essay should look like when you are finished.
Dear Mr. Hide,
I heard that you are considering uniforms. That is probably a bad idea because uniforms are
expensive, prevent kids from expressing themselves, and are uncomfortable. I believe that we
should not have uniforms.
Uniforms keep kids from expressing themselves. They keep kids from showing their mood
through colors. They keep them from expressing things they like. For example, lots of kids like
to show team spirit for their own teams or professional teams. It also keeps kids from having
fun shopping experiences. Some kids find shopping exhilarating and mind clearing. They might
enjoy it a lot. Uniforms keep kids from having these experiences.
Some people may say that having uniforms is easier for families, but uniforms can be
expensive. Some families can’t afford to buy uniforms because they have unemployed parents
or they do not make a lot of money. Uniforms would make it harder for them to maintain a
budget they can afford. Uniforms mean having two sets of clothes and that means spending
more money. Plus, you waste more water washing two sets of clothes instead of one. More
water used means more money spent on the water bill. That isn’t easier for families.
Lastly, uniforms can be too uncomfortable. When it is hot, you may have to wear sweaters or
heavy pants. You are not allowed to take them off. One of my friends actually got in trouble
for not wearing her sweater when she was supposed to. You also can’t wear shorts or
sneakers. Dress shoes are terribly hard to walk adding to the discomfort of the uniform. Kids
learn better when they are comfortable, so why would we force them to wear uniforms that
can be uncomfortable?
As I have proved in the paragraphs above, we should not have uniforms. They prevent kids
from expressing themselves, they are expensive, and they are uncomfortable. Mr. Hide, please
reject the idea of uniforms. They would make life harder for everyone.
Sincerely,
Ally
Breathing Life into Essays
Persuasive
Session 1 – How do you win an argument?
Today, in class, we spent time looking at examples of persuasive essays. Tonight, look at the example
below. In your writer’s notebook, make notes on what this author did to try to get people to agree with her
point of view. Then, offer suggests on what she could have done better.
Books are very important for students in school. They can learn many new things and improve
their skills. However, our school library sometimes doesn't have enough types of some books. I think
that the school fundraiser money should be used to buy more books for our school library.
First, our class is doing reports on different animals and there are only a few books available on
each kind. This makes it hard to do research and write our reports if we all have to share books, or
can't take them home to use. If the library could buy more books, we would be able to do our reports
better.
Second, there is sometimes only one copy of a fiction book on the shelf and kids have to take turns
checking it out. If the library could buy more copies of a book, then two kids could check out the
same book and partner-read together. This would help us get better at reading, plus it's fun to read
with a friend!
Third, there are many new things happening in the world and new information needs to be there for
kids to learn and read about. For example, maybe a new kind of dinosaur is discovered, or a new
president is elected. Without new books being bought for the library, kids will not be able to learn
about these things if we just have old books to check out.
So, it is important to buy more books for the library and the school fundraiser is a good way to get
the money! Kids will have more choices to read. We can keep up with new things that happen in the
world. Plus, we won't have to wait so long to have a chance to read our favorite book!
Breathing Life into Essays
Persuasive
Session 2 – Collecting Ideas & Choosing a Thesis
Today, in class, we came up with a thesis that we will be writing about during the day. Tonight, your
homework is to collect ideas and come up with another persuasive thesis. This will be a thesis that you will
continue to write about for homework each night.
Today, we wrote:
Topic: Field Trips
My school thesis was: Schools should send students on more field trips.
For example:
Ideas of things I could write about:
Topic: Snow days
Possible theses:
-People should help each other shovel.
-Teachers should be able to hold classes online so we don’t have to make up the days later.
-People who throw snowballs at cars should be punished.
Topic: Games
Possible theses:
-Kids should be allowed to play games at school.
-People should be kicked out of games if they cheat.
Topic: School
Possible theses:
-We should go with a year-round school model.
-The times of school days should be flipped so elementary kids go to school earlier and high
school kids go in later.
-School days should be extended.
My home thesis: The times of school days should be flipped so elementary kids go to school earlier and high
school kids go in later.
Breathing Life into Essays
Persuasive
Session 3 – Types of Appeals
Today, in class, we talked about three types of appeals that could help to develop our argument.
These appeal types are emotional, logical, and community spirit. Tonight, use these types of appeals to help
you brainstorm ideas for your home thesis. Write two paragraphs supporting your thesis. Each paragraph
should use a different type of appeal.
For example:
My home thesis: The times of school days should be flipped so elementary kids go to school earlier and high
school kids go in later.
Emotional appeal:
Parents want what’s best for their kids. Parents of teenagers know that their kids just can’t get up in the
morning. It breaks their hearts to see their kids struggling to get out of bed and get to the bus in time. Since it
is so hard for these kids to get up, they often miss breakfast or eat something less healthy. Do we really want
our kids to be unhealthy just so they can catch the bus on time? No! We care about our kids and want them to
get the right amount of sleep, eat right, and get the most out of their school day.
Logical appeal:
Studies have shown that younger children naturally wake up earlier. In addition, teenagers’ bodies stay up
later and need more sleep overall. Since this is the case, shouldn’t younger kids go to school earlier and older
kids go to school later? Other studies have also shown that high school students do better on tests when they
start school later in the day. It just makes sense to let them go to school later if it is better for their bodies and
has proven success academically.
Breathing Life into Essays
Persuasive
Session 4 – Planning with Boxes and Bullets
Today, in class, we came up with supporting ideas for our thesis. The thesis was the box and each
supporting idea was a bullet. Then, we came up with supporting details for our bing, bang, and bongo.
Tonight, you will do the same for your home thesis.
For example:
My thesis for homework:
The times of school days should be flipped so elementary kids go to school earlier and high school kids go in
later.
The times of school days should be flipped so elementary kids
go to school earlier and high school kids go in later.



Teenagers’ bodies would be helped by a later start time.
Teenagers’ performance in school would improve.
Families of elementary school kids would be helped.



Teenagers’ bodies would be helped by a later start time.
Their sleeping patterns would match their bodies’ needs.
They would be able to get the amount of sleep their bodies need.
They would get into less car accidents rushing to school
B
I
N
G



Teenagers’ performance in school would improve.
Teenagers would be in a better mood if it weren’t so early
Teens would be able to pay attention better.
Studies show that teenagers do better.
B
A
N
G



Families of elementary school kids would be helped.
Younger children wake up earlier.
Younger kids get in their parents way early in the morning.
It’s easier to pick up a little kid out of bed to get them ready.
B
O
N
G
O
Breathing Life into Essays
Persuasive
Session 5 – Opposing Arguments
Today, in class, we came up with opposing arguments for our thesis. Tonight, you will some up with
examples of what people who disagree with you might say and ways that you can refute their ideas.
For example:
My thesis for homework:
The times of school days should be flipped so elementary kids go to school earlier and high school kids go in
later.
The times of school days should be flipped so elementary kids
go to school earlier and high school kids go in later.



Teenagers’ bodies would be helped by a later start time.
Teenagers’ performance in school would improve.
Families of elementary school kids would be helped.
Opposing argument: Teenagers have many after school activities. They wouldn’t be able to get them all done
if they started school later.
I say: It would take less time to do homework if they were more awake and alert, so they could still do all their
activities.
Opposing argument: Elementary kids would get out of school too early and no one would be home to watch
them.
I say: Many families have to have day care in the morning and afternoon due to their parents work schedules.
This way, parents would only have to find daycare after school.
Breathing Life into Essays
Persuasive
Session 6 – Sharing to Test Your Ideas
Today, in class, we shared our boxes and bullets with our writing partners. We basically said our
essay out loud as complete sentences. Our goal was to weed out any bad ideas and/or come up with better
ideas by hearing our ideas out loud and giving our writing partners a chance to comment and give
suggestions. Tonight, find someone with whom to share your home boxes and bullets. In your writer’s
notebook, make any changes or jot down any ideas you receive from your nighttime helper.
For example:
Notice the changes from last night:
My thesis for homework:
The times of school days should be flipped so elementary kids go to school earlier and high school kids go in
later.
The times of school days should be flipped so elementary kids
go to school earlier and high school kids go in later.



Teenagers’ bodies would be helped by a later start time.
Teenagers’ performance in school would improve.
Families of elementary school kids would be helped.



Teenagers’ bodies would be helped by a later start time.
Their sleeping patterns would match their bodies’ needs.
They would be able to get the amount of sleep their bodies need.
Their brains would be ready to learn.
B
I
N
G



Teenagers’ performance in school would improve.
Teenagers would miss less school.
Teens would be able to pay attention better.
Studies show that teenagers do better.
B
A
N
G



Families of elementary school kids would be helped.
Younger children wake up earlier.
Younger children learn better in the morning.
It’s harder to get daycare for younger kids in the morning.
B
O
N
G
O
Breathing Life into Essays
Persuasive
Session 7 – Composing Mini-stories
Today, in class, we brainstormed mini-stories that support our theses. Tonight, use the guidelines to
help you as you compose some mini-stories to go with your nighttime thesis. Remember saying them
aloud (to a parent, friend, or even a pet) will help you to make sure you angle each story so it proves the
point from the essay.
Guidelines for Writing Supporting Stories for Essays
 Writers usually include a transition into the story
 The story needs to have a beginning, middle, and end.
 The story needs to be told to especially reveal the
part of it that illustrates the thesis and bullet points.
 At the end of the story, it is usually wise to include a
sentence that refers back to or repeats the main idea
of that paragraph.
For example:
When I was a teenager, I loved school. The problem was it was hard to stay awake. One time, I was sitting
in class trying so hard to pay attention. I could feel my eyelids starting to droop. I shifted positions in my
seat to try to keep myself awake. I tried to keep my pencil moving as I was taking notes on what the
teacher said, but my writing was getting messier and messier. My blinking was getting slower and slower
until I finally opened my eyes to see that my notes had become one long, crooked line. If only I had gotten
enough sleep, I would have been able to pay attention better.
Breathing Life into Essays
Persuasive
Session 8 – Drafting
Today, in class, we wrote a draft of our essays. Tonight, you will do the same with your home thesis.
Use your box and bullets plan to write the intro, three supporting paragraphs, and conclusion that reminds
people of your thesis, your three reasons, and your call to action. Your draft doesn’t have to be a letter, but
you should have a specific audience in mind.
For example:
Dear School Board Members,
I am writing to ask you to switch the high school and elementary school starting and ending schedules. Why?
There are many reasons to do this. First, teenagers bodies would be helped by a later start time plus their school
performance would improve. Also, families of elementary school kids would be helped by this move.
As children grow, their bodies change and need different things. The change in schedule would really help
teenagers’ bodies. Younger children go to bed earlier and wake up earlier, but teenagers’ sleeping schedule is
different. They can’t go to bed earlier, even if they want to! Their bodies don’t naturally get sleepy until 11:00 pm.
Since they can’t get to sleep until later, it would be helpful if they could sleep later in the morning. Teenagers’
bodies need about nine hours of sleep. The later start time would help them achieve that. Finally, with the right
amount of sleep, their brains would be ready to learn.
The change in schedule would also allow teenagers’ performance in school to improve. One reason is because
they would miss less school. Currently, teenagers oversleep often due to their bodies’ needs for sleep. They also are
absent from school more. It’s hard to keep healthy when you are not getting enough sleep. When I was a teenager, I
loved school. The problem was it was hard to stay awake. One time, I was sitting in class trying so hard to pay
attention. I could feel my eyelids starting to droop. I shifted positions in my seat to try to keep myself awake. I tried
to keep my pencil moving as I was taking notes on what the teacher said, but my writing was getting messier and
messier. My blinking was getting slower and slower until I finally opened my eyes to see that my notes had become
one long, crooked line. If only I had gotten enough sleep, I would have been able to pay attention better. This isn’t
just my opinion. Researchers have done studies that show teenagers’ do better in math and reading.
Another reason you should change the schedule is because it would help families of elementary school students.
Younger children naturally wake up earlier. They may spend the morning watching tv or playing video games.
Wouldn’t their time be better spent learning? In fact, younger children’s brains learn better in the morning. Finally,
many families have a tough time finding daycare for their children in the morning when parents have to be at work.
Afternoon daycare is much easier to find.
Some people think switching schedules is a bad idea because high school students have many after school
activities. They think that with a later schedule teenagers wouldn’t be able to play sports, have jobs, and do
homework. Studies of districts who have switched have proved this to be false.
As you can see, there are many reasons to switch the elementary and high school schedules. A new schedule
would better match the needs of teenagers’ bodies. In addition, high school students will do better once the
schedule matches their health needs. Finally, families of elementary students will benefit from the change. Knowing
that this change in schedule will have so many positive effects, you should make the change for next school year.
Sincerely,
Persuading Person
Breathing Life into Essays
Persuasive
Session 9 – Crafting Effective Leads & Endings
Today, in class, we revised our leads to ensure that they let readers know that what you are about to
tell them is important. We revised endings to show how we are acting differently or how others should act
differently based on what you have written. Tonight, use the charts to help you revise your home
introductory and concluding paragraphs.
Ways to Start an Essay




Tell a story about one person needing the information this essay will convey. What (that person and)
others need to know is that…
Many people (don’t know, don’t realize, don’t think), but I’ve (come to know, think it’s important)…
Have you ever (wondered/wanted to know)…? I have found …
Raise a question that people ask… and show that this essay will answer it.
Ways to End an Essay






(My thesis) is true. Because this is true, isn’t it also true that…
I realize that…
This makes me think…
I realize that when I…, I feel …
Other people should care about this because…
This is important because…
For example:
New introduction:
I know that you have dedicated your lives to helping students in our district to do their best and
receive the best education possible. If there was something easy that you could do to improve their ability to
learn as well as the quality of their lives and it wouldn’t cost the district any money, you would do it, wouldn’t
you? There is! All you have to do is switch the high school and elementary school starting and ending
schedules. Teenagers bodies would be helped by a later start time and their school performance would
improve. Also, families of elementary school kids would be helped by this move.
New ending:
As you can see, rock climbing is not easy. It takes skill. Balance is one important skill. Making decisions
is also very important. Finally, you’ll need to be able to do more than one job. This makes me think that
rock climbing is not for everyone. Is it for you?
Breathing Life into Essays
Persuasive
Session 10 – Revising for Style
Today, in class, we revised for style. We did this by adding transitions and figurative language. We
also played with our sentences by using independent and dependent clauses as well as various sentence
types. Tonight, revise your nighttime piece using these same strategies.
Examples of sentences with dependent clauses… at the beginning:
When writing, try to vary your sentences.
Before climbing, it is important to check your equipment.
…at the end.
Try to vary your sentences when writing.
It is important to check your equipment before climbing.
For example:
Dear School Board Members,
I know that you have dedicated your lives to helping students in our district to do their best and receive the best education
possible. If there was something easy that you could do to improve their ability to learn as well as the quality of their lives and it
wouldn’t cost the district any money, you would do it, wouldn’t you? There is! All you have to do is switch the high school and
elementary school starting and ending schedules. Teenagers’ bodies would be helped by a later start time and their school
performance would improve. Also, families of elementary school kids would be helped by this move.
As children grow, their bodies change and need different things. The adjustment in schedule would match the changes in
teenagers’ bodies. Younger children go to bed earlier and wake up earlier, but teenagers’ sleeping schedule is different. They can’t
go to bed earlier, even if they want to! Their bodies don’t naturally get sleepy until 11:00 pm. Since they can’t get to sleep until later,
it would be helpful if they could sleep longer in the morning. A later start time would allow high school students to get the nine
hours of sleep their bodies need. Finally, with the right amount of sleep, their brains would be ready to learn.
With their bodies ready to learn, teenagers’ performance in school would improve. One reason is because they would miss less
school. Currently, teenagers tend to oversleep. This causes them to be late for school. They also are absent from school more. It’s
hard to keep healthy when you are not getting enough sleep. When I was a teenager, I loved school. The problem was it was hard to
stay awake. One time, I was sitting in class trying so hard to pay attention, but I could feel my eyelids starting to droop. I shifted
positions in my seat to try to keep myself awake. I tried to keep my pencil moving as I was taking notes on what the teacher said, but
my writing was getting messier and messier. My blinking was getting slower and slower until I finally opened my eyes to see that my
notes had become one long, crooked line. If only I had gotten enough sleep, I would have been able to pay attention better. This
isn’t just my opinion. Researchers have done studies that show teenagers’ do better in math and reading in school that start later.
Another reason you should change the schedule is because it would help families of elementary school students. Younger
children naturally wake up earlier. They may spend the morning watching tv or playing video games. Wouldn’t their time be better
spent learning? In fact, younger children’s brains learn better in the morning. Finally, many families have a tough time finding
daycare for their children in the morning when parents have to be at work. Afternoon daycare is much easier to find.
Some people think switching schedules is a bad idea because high school students have many after school activities. They think
that with a later schedule teenagers wouldn’t be able to play sports, have jobs, and do homework. Studies of districts who have
switched have proved this to be false.
As you can see, there are many reasons to switch the elementary and high school schedules. A new schedule would better
match the needs of teenagers’ bodies. In addition, high school students will do better once the schedule matches their health needs.
Finally, families of elementary students will benefit from the change. Knowing that this change in schedule will have so many
positive effects, you should make the change for next school year.
Sincerely,
Persuading Person
Breathing Life into Essays
Persuasive
Session 11 – Planning for a Prompt
During this unit, we have gone through all the steps for brainstorming, planning, drafting,
revising, and publishing an informational essay. If we plan well, we can be assured that our piece will be
organized and be well on its way to having a sufficient amount of content. Tonight, plan all the boxes
and bullets for the prompt that follows.
Your school is thinking about adding a class or activity for students next year. Pick an activity or class you think
your school should have. Write a letter to your principal to persuade him or her why your school should have
this class or activity.
Your homework should include all of the boxes and bullets.
The times of school days should be flipped so elementary kids
go to school earlier and high school kids go in later.



Teenagers’ bodies would be helped by a later start time.
Teenagers’ performance in school would improve.
Families of elementary school kids would be helped.



Teenagers’ bodies would be helped by a later start time.
Their sleeping patterns would match their bodies’ needs.
They would be able to get the amount of sleep their bodies need.
Their brains would be ready to learn.
B
I
N
G



Teenagers’ performance in school would improve.
Teenagers would miss less school.
Teens would be able to pay attention better.
Studies show that teenagers do better.
B
A
N
G



Families of elementary school kids would be helped.
Younger children wake up earlier.
Younger children learn better in the morning.
It’s harder to get daycare for younger kids in the morning.
B
O
N
G
O