COUNTER CULTURE PROTEST: KENT. STATE UNIVERSITY 1970.
The following memoirs are from Margo Pettit, a student at Kent State at the time of the shootings. This event ended with four students dead, one paralyzed, and numerous others injured. President Richard Nixon ordered the National Guard to “lockdown” Kent State as a result of protests over the Vietnam War.
I was 18 years old at the time of the shootings feeling too young and unsure of myself, I wanted to work a year or something instead of starting college after graduation @1969, I had no self concept, no idea what I wanted or what to do with my life except get married and have 7 kids like my mom. That was a choice down the road, but not in 1970 because my high school sweetheart had a plan of building a home for us on a XMAS tree farm that a friend of his family wanted him to take over in NH and live the life of rustic, hippie lifestyle-close to the earth, peacenik, ultra alternative, but my father would not approve of me marrying the guy, so I had no choice but find a college---so to show my disappointment, anger etc. I picked the school furthest away from home that accepted me-
-HA! Little did I know! At that time a female had 3 choices to be a teacher, a nurse or a secretary-SERIOUSLY!!! And although the folks wanted me to go to college, it was made clear by my Dad and society that women were stupid, useless and should stay home and have kids--a small contradiction-so because I cheated and flunked typing class-secretary was out, my mother who I HATED was a nurse so screw that! I was fascinated by the Montessori method /my teachers were my mentors and so I choose Early Childhood Education, but it was my freshman year and was only taking basic stuff--KSU was on trimester--having no idea how to study, etc (I was just diagnosed last month with ADD/ADHD which now
EVERYTHING makes sense NOW!) I flunked out 1st trimester and returned in March or April 1970 after doing remedial work, counseling etc.
It was now the 3rd trimester and shortly thereafter the shit hit the fan! Also what was so weird was it was unthought-of of that I would EVER be in a "combat" situation because of having 4 older brothers. I never,
NEVER envisioned being chased out of the woods by helicopter lights, tear gassed, and shot at. So when it all happened there was no reference to base the experience on initially-- I was not for the idea of confrontation, violence, mayhem, war or adversity of any kind---equal rights for ALL, living peacefully amongst diverse groups without prejudice, hatred, judgment and living happily ever after as an earth person---my idols were JFK, RJK and MLK ,

John Lennon, etc ---all authority figures. But my brother
Chris was serving in NAM at the time voluntarily after his best friend, Ray Enners was killed, so I felt that I could not participate in the protesting @ KSU but earlier had marched on Washington.
The shootings and days thereafter were surreal!!
2days before the shootings I went with my new friends to
Cleveland to see my first porno movie--always hangin with the guys-- I was not into drinking or drugs and under age
21. Nothing regarding " THE REVOLUTION" or protesting was widespread on a campus of I think 11,000 students. On the way home we could see fire on the horizon which turned out to be the ROTC building (a small wooden framed structure) was ablaze late that Friday night--the next night I was in downtown Kent, a small very quiet town with bars and restaurants on every corner---sitting with friends in the coffee house watching the flick "Big Man Little Man" when stuff started flying thru the plate glass windows--the whole town was being destroyed by young people spontaneously which was organized by an outside group of protestors, presumably a fraction of the SDS, but definitely not locals. We are talking conservative cow country, cornfields, bible belt folks! Not too many people had an opinion about anything other then God. So the town was destroyed and everything was SHUTDOWN, WE WERE MANDATED
TO STAY ON CAMPUS WITH A CURFEW---the guard was called in
(this was on a weekend) people continued to gather to peacefully protest but we were not to congregate in threes or more so those sitting-in protest were tear gassed, bullied, etc--I felt helpless because I did not know how to help those injured and because the whole country was in upheaval with others protesting injured/killed I felt it was immediately necessary to learn how to care for others because it was eminent that the same circumstances would recur and I needed to be prepared for the next time!
No one believed the guard had real bullets! Either rubber ones or none at all! We socialized with them as they stood in lines surrounding the center of the campus-putting flowers in their rifle ends, casual, relaxed, party like atmosphere everyone sitting around the lawns watching each other on the first really warm sunny day--students smoking pot with 1 or 2 guardsman, girls flirting with them--most were as young as us--carnival like until the tear gassing started after dark during curfew and helicopter chasing myself and 1 other out of a small patch of trees with spotlights on us as we were walking back to the dorm just prior curfew that night--this was the

beginning of believing I needed to become a nurse--the next day we had classes then it went out that professors and students would gather at 12 noon to begin protesting the violence on campus and the war--people peacefully gathered with teachers and students equally outspoken with bullhorns calling out for peace and order, gathered to hear people speak individually, some holding hands singing and eventually when people would not disperse the guard started to move in lines to split the crowd peacefully but tempers began to flare with 1 small handful of students at the furthest distance away from the crowd at the farthest edge of the action from behind parked cars began to throw small rocks towards the guard in the crowd people started to leave and at one point with no warning as a line of guard walked away from the crowd-actually a small group of the crowd that had been separated but were not engaged in any violence==the guard walked away up an incline out of range of any harm, or threat-about 75-100 feet away they turned and fired into the crowd--it was an automatic reflex for me to hit the ground as shots were fired even though we thought there were no bullets in the guns--I was on a ridge looking down observing because of my brother Chris--and within what truly seemed like 1 minute an ambulance was arriving as if it was pre-orchestrated! It was bizarre!
The campus was immediately shutdown indefinitely at
4pm you had to be packed and gone! Many people I never heard from or saw again the mass exodus on the 2 lane highway was surreal--I spent the night in Cleveland with a women I was friendly with--for whatever reason I only hung out with juniors & seniors. 2 days later I flew back to NY and when I got in the driveway and my dad told me that I should have been shot with the rest of them! I was devastated and the days that followed when reading the articles in the NY Times about the days ad events I was furious due to absolute lies. Misrepresentation and misperceptions of EVERYTHING that had occurred--it was as if the authors were in a complete other reality it was too unbelievable that the country read and believed exactly the opposite truth of reality--placing full blame on the students, etc. Our only communication for the rest of the summer was packets mailed to us from each professor of each course I was taking with assignments to complete to receive a grade--as if nothing had happened--nothing else was said-
--it continued for years to play out in the press until years later the families of those 4 killed and 11 injured were given very small compensation and the guard held partially responsible for their inappropriate stuff

It was either that same week or the week or so later that a group of students were killed/injured in the South.
So I returned the following year with literally 2 armed men on every corner of the campus which was large rolling hills--it was so frightening!! Living in a police state afraid to breathe--it was so stressful!!!! I did not return after that year--my life was completely changed!!! I began drinking and drugging and for 18 years with the war cry of anti--establishment I drank and drugged daily-miserably believing the world had let us all down especially when my brother Chris came home from NAM thru the LA airport and he was greeted by people throwing trash at him!! It was all about rage at the government. Little did I know I was self-destructing and trying to kill myself--believing at the end that I was destined to be a drunk and an addict in the gutter!!! I believed that was why I was here on earth and my lot in life with no belief in god or another human being until I was diagnosed with my
2nd cancer in 1988, I was suddenly afraid to die after self destructing my entire life and found spirituality and hope by getting clean and sober---those few days were life changing @KSU---thanx for "listening!" Love to you all! and so thankful you did not need to follow the same path I did!!! Love, Auntie M