Introductions
Whe n Jenkins ej ected Wil son from the Munic ipal Air port becaus e he w as m ere ly apprehens ive about a
poss ibl e di sturbance. In doing so, he viol ate d Wi ls on’s Fir st Amendm ent ri ght of fr ee expres sion. The
Fi rst Ame ndment pr otec ts thos e w ho e xerci se the ir ri ght of fre e s peech in a publ ic forum, e ven w hen that
exe rci se rais es the possi bil ity of a dis turbanc e. In Tinke r v. Des Moi nes School s Di st. , the Supre me Court
rul ed that “undi fferentiated fear or apprehe nsion of dis turbanc e i s not enough to ove rcom e the right to
freedom of e xpress ion. ”
No offici al may deny anyone hi s Firs t Am endm ent ri ghts si mpl y bec ause that offi cial i s vaguely
appre hensi ve that the per son m ight c ause a di stur bance. Ac cordi ng to the c ourt, the offici al mus t point to
“spe cific evi dence of actual or im pending viol ence .” Whe n Jenkins ej ected Wil son he vi olated Wil son’
Fi rst Ame ndment r ight to free expre ssi on, because he coul d poi nt to no suc h spe cific evi dence . H e had only
vague apprehe nsions .
When Wilson exercised his freedom of expr ession by holding a sign in t he
concourse, he did nothing t o evidence an impending disturbance of any kind. He was
st anding silently, against a w all, and not obst ructing or disturbing the concourse in any
way. Moreover, Jenkins can point to no evidence of violence in Wilson’s past that
could have led him t o be apprehensive that Wilson’s peaceful pr otest might become
disrupt ive. C ross C ont inental Airlines found Wilson to be a satisfact ory em ployee f or
ten years, and even during his treatm ent for mental illness, all the evidence indicates
that he was always in contr ol of himself. As reason t o eject Wilson from the concourse
on t he basis of som e risk to passenger s or anyone else, Jenkins can say only that he was
vaguely apprehensive.
When C ross Continent al learned of Wilson’s m ent al illness and it s
misrepresent ation in his r ecords, it fired him because of the falsificat ion of his recor d
and because it believed his condition might lead to violence. When Cross C ontinental
notified Jenkins of Wilson’s pr otest in its concourse and asked Jenkins to eject him , it
comm unicated its concer n about Wilson’s mental illness to Jenkins. Accor ding to
Jenkins, he agreed w ith Cross C ontinental’s appr ehension over the possibilit y of
disturbance and so on the basis of that vague evidence alone, he decided to expel
Wilson from the airport.
Jenkins acquiesced to Cross C ontinental's request to expel Wilson from the airport
because he was appr ehensive that Wilson’s picket ing m ight create a disturbance. But
all Jenkins knew was that Cr oss Continental w as concerned about Wilson’s medical
history and did not want Wilson to pr otest his dism issal in t he concour se. N ot until
C ross Continent al asked him to expel Wilson because of his prot est, did Jenkins have
any r eason to be concerned about Wilson, and even then Jenkins had nothing but
vague apprehensions about the possibility of a dist ur bance. He could point to no
specific evidence of any actual impending dist ur bance.
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I NT RO D UCTI O N
Preamble, Overture,
Framework for Understanding
The Introduction sets the stage for
readers. Readers use Introductions
to set a mental framework for the
argument they will encounter and
the set of concepts they will be
asked to remember.
BOD Y
Development, Resolution,
Fulfillment of Expectations
The Body develops the matters
announced in the Introduction,
responds to the question or problem
raised in the Introduction, and meets
the expectations readers take away
from the Introduction.
Jenkins has a long hist ory of running t he air por t m ore f or t he convenience of the
airlines t han for the needs and r ights of the public. Wilson was not the fir st har mless
protester to be removed f rom airport public spaces on the request of an airline. Since
1982, seven gr oups have obtained cour t or der s allow ing t hem to demonstrat e on
airport pr oper ty af ter Jenkins had them r emoved for no reason better than t he kind of
vague apprehensions he claims in this case. Four of those seven groups had been
repeatedly ejected befor e obtaining court orders. Airport recor ds do not reveal how
many of t he persons ejected from the airport in that period wer e rem oved because they
att empted to present a message t o the public that J enkins or an airline did not like or
approve. But given the seven groups who did take Jenkins to cour t and given the ease
with w hich C ross Continent al was able to get Jenkins to eject Wilson for no good
reason, w e can only conclude t hat it w as r out ine pract ice for Jenkins to deny citizens
their r ight to f ree expression merely to satisfy the r equest of an airline or because
Jenkins was vaguely apprehensive of a disturbance.
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Introductions
The Grammatical Structure of an Introduction
Every Introduction has three grammatical functions.
1. Establish what’s at stake for readers.
Readers will look for your Introduction to tell them what’s at stake for them in reading your document. They
want to know why it will be worth their while to read on, often what in particular the document will deliver. In
professional situations, what’s at stake will normally be some task facing the reader or the writer, a task whose
completion the document will advance. In academic situations, what’s at stake is usually some form of
ignorance or misunderstanding that the document will clear up.
2. In the hot spot, end by moving the reader forward with your global point or a launching
point.
At the end of the Introduction, readers are
conditioned to look for a point important enough to
propel them into the rest of the essay; accordingly,
we call the end of the introduction the hot spot. In
most business writing, the document's hot spot
presents your document's main point. Otherwise, the
hot spot should contain a launching point—a
statement that anticipates that central claim.
3. Set up connecting threads.
Readers will look for your Introduction to announce
those concepts that you will weave as connecting
threads through the rest of your text. Be sure that you
mention them in the last few sentences at the end of
your Introduction. In particular, readers look in your
Introduction for
• the characters who play the principal roles in the
story your sentences tell.
• the key concepts or themes which will be central to
your argument. What these concepts are will
depend on what kind of argument you make.
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The following is the introduction to an article in an economics journal:
The United States is at present the world’s largest exporter of agricultural products:
its agricultural net balance of payments in recent years has exceeded $10 billion per
year. As rising costs of imported petroleum and other goods have increased the U.S.
trade deficit, we face a greater need to understand the effects of this agricultural
surplus. American farmers now account for 43% of the world’s exports of coarse
grains. Agricultural exports maintain profitable market prices for the American
farmer and bolster the national economy by providing over one million jobs. Income
from farm exports is used to purchase about $9 billion worth of farm machinery and
equipment annually. Exports of U.S. agricultural products also reduce pricedepressing surpluses. Thus, U.S. agricultural export policies have a far-reaching
national and international impact.
The following is the introduction to an article in Scientific American.
2
At the dawn of the nuclear age, in the late 1940’s and early 1950’s, it was
fashionable to believe that science, having “split the atom,” had ushered in a new era of
abundant, inexpensive energy. Such comments as the one that electricity would soon be
so cheap it would not be worth metering were perhaps excessive reflections of that
euphoria, but Americans had, after all, been conditioned by a generation of science
fiction to expect the arrival of atomic power in some form. Even in retrospect it is not
easy to see how one could have foreseen that the next two decades would bring with
them a widespread revolt against technology and, as a related event, a great debate about
the desirability of nuclear power. This article is about one aspect of the great debate
about the desirability of nuclear power.
Polls and ballot contests continue to show that a majority of the American people
favor the further development of nuclear power, particularly when they are fairly
presented with the alternatives. Nevertheless, a substantial, concerned, and active
minority have continued to raise three major issues: the potential role of fission-power
reactors in the proliferation of nuclear weapons, the long-term disposal of radioactive
wastes, and the safety of the present generation of “light water” reactors. The further
spread of nuclear weapons to untrustworthy parties is essentially a political problem with
some technical components. Radioactive-waste disposal is a problem whose technical
solution could take many forms, none of which has yet materialized, in part because of
the agony of choice and in part for social and political reasons. Reactor safety, in
contrast, would appear to be entirely a technical problem. Alas, it is not.
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3
GARY & LIST
CERTIFIED PUBLIC ACCOUNTANTS
J. Williams Gary, C.P.A.
K. Garner List, C.P.A.
Janine R. Starr, C.P.A.
Robert L. Windower, C.P.A.
Kim Sung-Flowers, C.P.A.
1300 E. Columbus Street
P.O. Box 1928
Corvallis, Oregon 73584
Phone 802/601-3902
FAX 802/601-2548
INSPECTION PROGRAM REPORT, YEAR ENDING DECEMBER 31, 1993
The firm’s inspection program has been completed for the year ending December 31, 1993.
The inspection program includes a sample review of some of our clients’ files. Reviews of
workpapers, audit program, checklists, and so forth are performed in order to see that all
staff follow procedures and apply them consistently. The purpose of the inspection is to
help us all improve the quality of our work in this office and to prepare for our next peer
review in May of 1994.
The following is a list of findings from the inspection that we can all review and learn from:
1. INDEPENDENCE
Our review disclosed a case where our firm was not independent of a client and where this
fact was not noted in our report. A compilation report was issued but the statement that the
firm was not independent was not included. Everyone in the firm signs a statement on
independence annually, but not everyone may have available the list of clients of which we
are not independent. The following is a list of clients of which we are not independent as of
November 30, 1993: [list of clients]
2. CHECKLIST FOR COMPILATION AND REVIEWS
Last year we issued a policy memo with information about signing off on audit steps in the
audit programs. However, it appears that we may have been somewhat lax about signing off
on the compilation and review checklists.
We need to be sure that these checklists of procedures are followed to the letter and then
signed off. If you have a question about a procedure, ask one of the partners for an
explanation. As a reminder, disclosure checklists also need to be completed for each
financial statement prepared when notes are included.
In addition, a cover sheet is required on the compiled and reviewed financial statement. The
cover sheet must list “date prepared,” “reviewed by,” “typed by” and “footed by,” and
“signed by.” …………………………
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Launching Points Should Be Thematically Explicit
A Launching Point Sentence is thematically explicit when it introduces the
central concepts of the main body of the text.
A Launching Point must offer the reader enough concepts to create specific
expectations about the concepts that will follow in the text. When you use few
or no specific concepts in the Hot Spot at the end of the Introduction, readers
will guess what concepts to use as keys around which to organize the rest of
the essay.
4
a. Talcott Parsons’ reputation should be re-evaluated because his writing negatively
influenced political discourse.
b. Although Talcott Parsons is honored by many as the model for American
sociology, his reputation is tarnished by the inaccessibility of his writing.
Parson’s turgid style so damaged the reputation of sociology that it for decades,
sociology had little influence on our national political discourse.
5
a
Misconceptions about Columbus have had important cultural consequences.
b. Our historical and cultural misconceptions about Columbus’ heroism and
brilliance promote a kind of cultural chauvinism and racial bigotry that distorts
American history and encourages social divisiveness.
6
a. Although the emancipated Russian peasants improved socially, they did not
improve economically.
b. Although the Russian peasants' social standing and social mobility improved
with emancipation, so that they were no longer considered slaves, their economic
condition deteriorated so severely that their higher social status had little effect
on the quality of their daily lives.
7
a. The effects of the Civil War can still be felt in American life today.
b. The effects of the Civil War still divide the politics and economics of the North
and the South, creating antithetical views about the relationship between federal
and state government.
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Introductions
Themes Should Be Developed in Thematic Strings
A Thematic String is a series of related words that remind readers of the
central concepts that organize the discussion in the body.
8
In comparison to the statutory method, plaintiffs may find certain advantages in the
equitable right of recovery. First, plaintiffs need not strictly comply with statutory
requirements. Second, they may be able to recover more because their recovery can be
tailored to the equities of the controversy. If, for example, a plaintiff tried to recover rents
through a statutory action, he could recover only the value of use and occupation
exclusive of improvements to the property. In an equitable proceeding, on the other hand,
a plaintiff can recover rents based upon the value of the property with the defendant’s
improvements thereupon, as the plaintiff did in Wilson. Also, plaintiffs face a relaxed
evidentiary standard in equitable proceedings. In Tyson, the plaintiff was allowed to
produce evidence of the original cost of the improvements instead of how much the
improvements had enhanced the value of the land. Most importantly, in order to recover in
equity a plaintiff would not have to possess the property one year before he files suit.
Theme A, equitable recovery: equitable right of recovery, recover , recovery, equities, recover ,
recover, equitable proceeding, recover, equitable proceedings, equitable proceedings
Theme B, statutory method: statutory method, statutory, statutory action
9
Since Abco has not used strategic planning to make decisions, we need to be particularly
careful with the first strategic planning exercise. First of all, we must make line managers
believe in strategic planning. Line managers will accept a system for making decisions
only if it is practical and allows them to translate strategic goals into daily action. If line
managers believe that the first exercise has failed, they will be reluctant to accept
strategic planning, and all our efforts could be damned from the start. Second, line
managers will raise a host of analytical issues during the first exercise, and we must be
prepared to address them. If we are going to have ready answers, we will have to
anticipate line managers' questions and prepare appropriate analyses before we define the
strategic plans fully. For the first exercise, this process will be time-consuming. But in
future planning exercises line managers should raise many fewer issues unless outside
occurrences dramatically change the competitive landscape. Finally, in developing
strategic plans, we will have to review certain details of Abco's management practices.
Doing so, we are bound to expose plenty of corpses and highlight organizational problems
that stand in the way of clear-headed decision-making. If we do not dispose of these
problems effectively and tactfully right at the start, the ultimate system could suffer
considerably.
Theme A, credibility: believe in, accept, is practical and allows, believe, failed, reluctant to
accept, damned, be prepared, ready answers, corpses, problems, dispose of these problems
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Theme B, strategic planning exercise: strategic planning, strategic planning exercise, system
for making decisions, strategic goals, strategic planning, exercise, strategic plans, exercise,
planning exercises, strategic plans, system
The Oppenheimer committee’s arguments for stopping the Superbomb project were sound,
but it is not certain that President Truman could have taken this sound advice. The
President had to consider a much wider range of factors, including an array of domestic
and international political tensions that could not be ignored. Truman faced a cold war
that was intensifying, and he was anxious about the belligerent Sino-Soviet bloc
proclaimed by Mao Tse-Tung and Joseph Stalin. His bipartisan foreign policy was being
deserted by angry Republicans, and he knew that general Congressional and public
opinion was beginning to come down heavily on the side of a strong response to the first
Russian atom-bomb test. A professional politician like Truman would inevitably conclude
that the atmosphere was too intense to run even a small risk of being second in the arms
race. He had to think that to reject the Superbomb was politically too difficult an
alternative. Though the advice was sound, it was impossible politics.
10
Theme A, domestic and international politics: domestic and international political, Sino-Soviet
bloc, bipartisan foreign policy, Republicans, Congressional and public opinion, Russian,
professional politician, politically, politics
Theme B, tensions: tensions, cold war, intensifying, anxious, belligerent, angry, intense, risk,
arms race, difficult
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11a
Introductions
The following documents are two versions of a university student’s response to a
persuasive letter assignment. The author’s task was to write a query letter to an
area business asking it to participate in the University Partners Program, a program
in which professional writing classes go to work for local organizations. (The
student was to write the letter in the instructor's name.)
University of Illinois
at Urbana-Champaign
Department of English
208 English Building
608 S. Wright St.
Urbana, Il linois 61801
(217) 333-1006
May 18, 2001
Mr. John Richards
Publications Manager
Hunter LAN Technologies
800 S. Mattis Ave.
Champaign, IL 61821
Dear Mr. Richards:
The University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign is one of the most respected and
honored universities in the country. We at the U of I have attained this reputation by
offering our students a variety of special and interesting opportunities for learning. One
of these programs is the University Partners Program, and now we have chosen Hunter
LAN Technologies as a potential participant in it.
We created the University Partners Program to allow University of Illinois students in
professional writing courses to work with real world businesses and generate quality
written products. This program seeks to develop the skills of our professional writing
students by allowing them to create, research, design, and edit projects for area
businesses.
Mr. Richards, this is your chance to be part of the U of I’s success! By participating in
this program, Hunter LAN Technologies will be able to contribute to this fine institution.
Past students in the University Partners Program have received the chance to work with
Signet Information Systems, Inc., and the Salvation Army. One group of professional
writing students developed icons for Signet’s computer systems; a second group
generated screen design standards for Signet engineers to follow. The diversity of
students allows them to complete many different activities from which they develop their
writing, presentation, research, collaboration, and negotiation skills.
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John Richards
May 18, 2001
Page 2
Once Hunter has decided on a product for students to create, the University Partners
process can be initiated. The program schedule begins with a presentation by a
representative of your company to explain your organization and the possible areas in
which students can participate. After explaining the project to the students, you will have
the opportunity to create a personalized work schedule with them. The students will
present Hunter LAN Technologies with a detailed proposal and progress reports for you
to evaluate.
This is an opportunity to become involved with the community, while at the same time
helping University of Illinois students develop and hone their professional
communications skills. Please contact me for further information and to set up projects
for this fall semester.
Thank you,
Marissa DiPaolo
Instructor of Business and Technical Writing
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11b
University of Illinois
at Urbana-Champaign
Department of English
208 English Building
608 S. Wright St.
Urbana, Il linois 61801
(217) 333-1006
May 18, 2001
Mr. John Richards
Publications Manager
Hunter LAN Technologies
800 S. Mattis Ave.
Champaign, IL 61821
Dear Mr. Richards:
When Signet Information Systems, Inc., needed someone to create and produce a series
of computer icons to label books into categories, they didn’t turn to an in-house design
team or to some expensive consultant. They came to the University Partners Program
at the University of Illinois, where they worked with students in professional writing
courses to produce the work they needed. Students researched the characteristics of
icons, tested their theories, and presented their findings to Signet. The presentation was
accompanied by documents that established standards for Signet engineers to follow.
The University of Illinois Partners Program was created to allow local businesses and
community organizations to work together with university students. Businesses help
students develop their professional writing skills by having them create, research,
design, and edit projects. Students gain from working in an authentic real-life situation,
and client organizations receive an original perspective and high-quality work.
Past participants in the University Partners Program have included Wolfram Research,
Inc., the Salvation Army, and Allied Hobby. For Wolfram, students conducted
usability tests of manuals for the Mathematica computer program, and created and
distributed marketing surveys to university and high school student users and teachers.
For the Salvation Army, students were in charge of public relations, writing four press
releases for the Salvation Army’s annual Christmas media kit. For Allied, students
wrote and revised manuals for assembling radio-controlled model cars. Scott Calliope,
Product Development Manager of Allied, puts it best: “It was really a win-win
situation: we were able to give students the kind of experience not found in a the
typical classroom, and their insightful input offered us a different perspective.”
The University Partners Program offers a variety of benefits for businesses that
become clients. A collaborative work atmosphere presents a fresh perspective and new
innovative ideas for your work. The time you offer is the only cost you have. You have
access to a pool of students’ ideas and to University resources. You own the legal
rights to any work produced. You are participating in a cutting-edge program.
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John Richards
May 18, 2001
Page 2
As an instructor of a professional writing class, I would like to invite Hunter LAN
Technologies to become a client of the University Partners Program. This program will
allow you to establish strong ties to the University and to become mentors to students
who are developing their professional communications skills. I will call in one week to
schedule a meeting to discuss the University Partners Program with you. If you have
any questions before then, you can contact me at 217/333-1234 or email me at
maris@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu. Thank you very much, and I look forward to talking to you
soon.
Sincerely,
Marissa DiPaolo
Instructor of Business and Technical Writing
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The Social Structure of an Introduction — I
Common Ground
Here are two introductions to a student essay. They introduce the same
characters and themes (though neither explicitly states a problem). They
differ in the kind and amount of Context they offer. Which essay do English
professors predict will receive an “A” and which a grade of “C” or below?
Why?
12a
Donne’s “A Lecture upon the Shadow” gently admonishes his lover to maintain the
honesty and integrity implicit in their relationship lest they should come to deceive
themselves as they had the lovers in their separate pasts. The poem is in two sections, each
tightly defined by rhyme scheme and line length (see attached). The first is primarily a
metaphoric history of their past relationships, in which the shadow speaks for both the
insubstantial, though haunting quality of the past and their deliberate deception of previous
lovers. Donne then tells us that past behavior no longer applies, and thereby implies his
current relationship is everything the previous ones were not: mature; complete; emotionally
honest. With an eye toward preserving this newfound purity, the second section moves into
the future and prescribes against the disingenuousness of the first.
The opening couplet establishes Donne’s seriousness . . . .
12b
“Come with me and be my love . . . .” What lover of poetry has not been thrilled by
words like these? Love has always been one of the most durable and exciting appeals that
poetry makes on its readers. Love is certainly one of the most important sources of appeal in
the poetry of John Donne, although sometimes the love in question is love of God. Unlike
other love poets, however, John Donne tries to use argument to make his lovers love him.
Donne’s “A Lecture upon the Shadow” is a poem that makes an argument. In this poem,
Donne gently admonishes his lover to maintain the honesty and integrity implicit in their
relationship lest they should come to deceive themselves as they had the lovers in their
separate pasts. The poem has two sections. Each section has the same rhyme scheme and
stanza structure. In each section, Donne has one long stanza (aabbcddceee) with varied line
length (in syllables, the lines run 6, 10, 7, 7, 10, 10, 6, 10, 8, 8, 10) and a closing couplet.
The first section is a primarily a history of their past relationships told in metaphors. In this
section the shadow speaks for both the insubstantial, though haunting quality of the past and
their deliberate deception of previous lovers. Donne then tells us that past behavior no
longer applies. Thereby he implies his current relationship is everything the previous ones
were not: mature; complete; emotionally honest. With an eye toward preserving this
newfound purity, the second section moves into the future. In it Donne prescribes against
the disingenuousness of the first section.
The opening couplet shows that Donne is serious . . .
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One important consideration in designing Introductions is how quickly ideas
are put on the table. An Introduction such as 13 assumes that its readers
know a great deal: for example, that they already have intimate knowledge of
the “Fluid-film forces in squeeze-film dampers.” As a result, it limits itself to a
narrow and very specialized audience, taking a stand toward its readers that
is highly technical and elitist. On the other hand, 14 treats its background as
information that it first has to introduce — treats it, in other words, as
relatively new information. As a result, even though 14 requires some
technical knowledge, it will be understandable to a wider range of readers
and does not have the exclusive, elitist feel of 13.
13
From a technical journal:
Introduction
Fluid-film forces in squeeze-film dampers (SFD) have nearly been always obtained
from the Reynolds equation of classical lubrication theory. However, the increase in
size of rotating machinery and the use of light viscosity oils have brought the need to
include fluid inertia effects in the analysis and design of SFDs.
14
From a technical journal:
Introduction
One of the more promising methods of protecting downstream migrating juvenile
fish at hydroelectric power developments is diversion by screening in the turbine
intakes. The method consists of suspending a screen in the intake water passage-way
to direct the fish toward and into a gate well for subsequent collection and release
downstream of the dam. Such a system is under development for the Corps of
Engineers’ dams on the lower Columbia and Snake Rivers (Farr 1974; Krcma, et al.
1980). In 1983, Grant County Public Utility District (PUD) undertook a project to
develop, on a trial basis, a similar system for the Wanapum Development and the
Priest Rapids Development on the mid Columbia River. The design of the intakes at
Wanapum and Priest Rapids is quite different from those of the Corps, and hence
different screen designs for these intakes had to be developed. (The intakes for
Wanapum and Priest Rapids are virtually identical, and consequently the same screen
systems could be used for both.)
Since the efficiency of the fish screens is determined by the interaction of the fish
behavior and the hydraulic flow conditions, a new screen design can be evaluated to
a certain extent by determining the hydraulic performance of the screens. Hydraulic
model studies can provide such data and were considered essential for the design of
effective screens. The model studies served not only to test the hydraulic
performance of the screens, but also to guide improvement in the structural design of
the screens. The study resulted in a better understanding of the hydraulic features of
the technique, which can be a guide for future designs.
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Note how 15 makes witty use of the principle we saw in 13 and 14. The first
sentence sounds like a slow introduction that makes allowances for readers
who do not share the author’s knowledge. But what it does not do is name
that large, complicated English satire published in 1704. (Jonathan Swift’s
Tale of a Tub, which even some experts will miss because it is usually
associated with 1699, the date of its composition.) Unless you know a great
deal about not only the traditional canon of English literature, but also about
its publishing history, you are not likely to recognize the reference to Tale of
a Tub and so will be excluded from the audience of this piece. This is an
elitist, insider’s move par excellence: its masquerade of openness only
implicates the knowing reader as an insider as elitist as the author.
15
From a literary journal:
Satires, especially large, complicated English satires published in the year 1704,
often seem to have two faces because, as a genre, they direct their vision in two
different ways. On the one hand, they see or sense the way things ought to be under
the law of rational decorum, disciplined allegiance, traditional order, which was our
forefathers’ seemly style of living; on the other hand, they are painfully aware of the
many outrages and indignities daily perpetrated against this standard by the knaves
and fools into whom our race has degenerated. Men of longsighted, judicious, and
scholarly vision naturally take the nobler and more positive view; and, apart from our
superior wisdom, we are often assisted in doing so by convenient circumstances,
such as a relatively secure income, an established place in an established hierarchy, a
set of values (if not wholly unchallenged) we feel confidently of being able to
defend. Unfortunately, we are not usually the people who pen great and unsettling
satires.
A Caution for Students: Because they are professional academics, professors
are free to use the statement of Context to shape their readers’ responses in the
way we have seen. They can do so because their status gives them a certain degree
of automatic trust: they are assumed to know at least as much as their readers. As
students, you can’t count on your readers to make the same assumption. You
generally have to earn your readers’ trust. For students, the statement of Context is
your chance to demonstrate that you know the background to your subject, that you
have in fact “done your homework” in preparing the essay. So you usually can’t
afford to leave out most of the Context in the way that the writer of 14 has done.
On the other hand, you also can’t afford to include too much Context. If you explicitly
state information that “goes without saying” for your reader, then you portray
yourself as an outsider who knows too little. It is as important to know what you
should not say as to know what you should say.
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The Social Structure of an Introduction — II
Resolution, Promise or Point
1. Point First
“Reader, I am telling you right up front my Point, the solution to your problem or
the answer to your question. Because you know right from the start both the
problem/question and my response, you are in control of this text. You can stop
now, if you like my response and trust me to have supported it to your
satisfaction. Or you can read everything carefully, or just the sections that interest
or concern you. I leave it up to you.”
ISSUE
DISCUSSION
Introduction
Body
Conclusion
Point
2. Point First and Last
“Reader, I am telling you right up front my Point, the solution to your problem or
the answer to your question. Because you know right from the start both the
problem/question and my response, you are in control of this text. Stop now or
read on; it’s up to you. But because this is a long document or section and I think
you might read on to the end, I will repeat my Point in the Conclusion, just to
make sure you remember it.”
ISSUE
DISCUSSION
Introduction
Body
Point
Conclusion
Point
3. Promise First, Point Last
“Reader, I promise you up front, in my Launching Point, that I will get to the
solution to your problem or the answer to your question. But that Main Point
won’t be coming until the end. Because you don’t know where I will lead you,
you’ll have to pay close attention and stay with me until the end. Mind now that
you don’t get lost along the way.”
ISSUE
DISCUSSION
Introduction
Body
Promise
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Point
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The Nature of Introductions
Your Introduction tells readers what to expect:
Readers always take Introductions as the conceptual
basis for the rest of the text. They use to it create a
cognitive framework of concepts, story lines,
attitudes, and other elements of the mental scenario
they will build as they read. The more effectively your
Introduction prepares readers, the better they will
understand what follows.
Readers understand books, memos, and even paragraphs by building a mental model or
scenario. Readers can only build this scenario if they can organize the information in the
text because they know what to expect. When it succeeds, the Introduction does more
than any other part of the text to control readers’ developing sense of the coherence and
meaning of the whole.
The Introduction controls readers’ developing sense of coherence and meaning in two
ways:
Key Characters and Key Concepts that the reader can use to build
a coherent model of the story conveyed by the text.
What’s at Stake for readers by relating matters developed in the
text to some need, problem, or interest that can play a role in the readers’ life and
work. We all organize our knowledge and beliefs in terms of those needs, problems,
and interests that govern our life and work. (Call this self-interest if you will.)
If readers can understand your text in terms of the needs, problems, and interests that
organize their knowledge and beliefs, and in terms of characters and concepts connected
to what they know and believe, they will understand your text well and easily – and,
even more importantly, they will understand it in your terms.
There are many ways to use Introductions to create a base for coherence and meaning,
ranging from the most explicit declaration (“The purpose of this report is. . . .”) to
extremely subtle means of seeding in a reader’s mind ideas that may not appear until
later. In later sessions we’ll talk about the range of possibilities for using Introductions
strategically.
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Whe n Jenkins ej ected Wil son from the Munic ipal Air port becaus e he w as m ere ly apprehens ive about a
poss ibl e di sturbance. In doing so, he viol ate d Wi ls on’s Fir st Amendm ent ri ght of fr ee expres sion. The
Fi rst Ame ndment pr otec ts thos e w ho e xerci se the ir ri ght of fre e s peech in a publ ic forum, e ven w hen that
exe rci se rais es the possi bil ity of a dis turbanc e. In Tinke r v. Des Moi nes School s Di st. , the Supre me Court
rul ed that “undi fferentiated fear or apprehe nsion of dis turbanc e i s not enough to ove rcom e the right to
freedom of e xpress ion. ”
No offici al may deny anyone hi s Firs t Am endm ent ri ghts si mpl y bec ause that offi cial i s vaguely
appre hensi ve that the per son m ight c ause a di stur bance. Ac cordi ng to the c ourt, the offici al mus t point to
“spe cific evi dence of actual or im pending viol ence .” Whe n Jenkins ej ected Wil son he vi olated Wil son’
Fi rst Ame ndment r ight to free expre ssi on, because he coul d poi nt to no suc h spe cific evi dence . H e had only
vague apprehe nsions .
HO T SPO T
When Wilson exercised his freedom of expr ession by holding a sign in t he
concourse, he did nothing t o evidence an impending disturbance of any kind. He was
st anding silently, against a w all, and not obst ructing or disturbing the concourse in any
way. Moreover, Jenkins can point to no evidence of violence in Wilson’s past that
could have led him t o be apprehensive that Wilson’s peaceful pr otest might become
disrupt ive. C ross C ont inental Airlines found Wilson to be a satisfact ory em ployee f or
ten years, and even during his treatm ent for mental illness, all the evidence indicates
that he was always in contr ol of himself. As reason t o eject Wilson from the concourse
on t he basis of som e risk to passenger s or anyone else, Jenkins can say only that he was
vaguely apprehensive.
When C ross Continent al learned of Wilson’s m ent al illness and it s
misrepresent ation in his r ecords, it fired him because of the falsificat ion of his recor d
and because it believed his condition might lead to violence. When Cross C ontinental
notified Jenkins of Wilson’s pr otest in its concourse and asked Jenkins to eject him , it
comm unicated its concer n about Wilson’s mental illness to Jenkins. Accor ding to
Jenkins, he agreed w ith Cross C ontinental’s appr ehension over the possibilit y of
disturbance and so on the basis of that vague evidence alone, he decided to expel
Wilson from the airport.
The "Hot Spot " at the end of
Introduction is the most important
spot for setting the stage for readers.
This is where you should
concentrate the words naming the
key concepts or themes that will
serve as connecting threads for your
argument.
This is also the "launching point,"
which should either state the main
point of the essay or state a lesser
point that anticipates the main point.
Jenkins acquiesced to Cross C ontinental's request to expel Wilson from the airport
because he was appr ehensive that Wilson’s picket ing m ight create a disturbance. But
all Jenkins knew was that Cr oss Continental w as concerned about Wilson’s medical
history and did not want Wilson to pr otest his dism issal in t he concour se. N ot until
C ross Continent al asked him to expel Wilson because of his prot est, did Jenkins have
any r eason to be concerned about Wilson, and even then Jenkins had nothing but
vague apprehensions about the possibility of a dist ur bance. He could point to no
specific evidence of any actual impending dist ur bance.
Jenkins has a long hist ory of running t he air por t m ore f or t he convenience of the
airlines t han for the needs and r ights of the public. Wilson was not the fir st har mless
protester to be removed f rom airport public spaces on the request of an airline. Since
1982, seven gr oups have obtained cour t or der s allow ing t hem to demonstrat e on
airport pr oper ty af ter Jenkins had them r emoved for no reason better than t he kind of
vague apprehensions he claims in this case. Four of those seven groups had been
repeatedly ejected befor e obtaining court orders. Airport recor ds do not reveal how
many of t he persons ejected from the airport in that period wer e rem oved because they
att empted to present a message t o the public that J enkins or an airline did not like or
approve. But given the seven groups who did take Jenkins to cour t and given the ease
with w hich C ross Continent al was able to get Jenkins to eject Wilson for no good
reason, w e can only conclude t hat it w as r out ine pract ice for Jenkins to deny citizens
their r ight to f ree expression merely to satisfy the r equest of an airline or because
Jenkins was vaguely apprehensive of a disturbance.
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Tracking Key Concepts through Thematic Strings
When you use an effective Thematic String, you help your readers organize their
understanding of your argument around a set of key concepts that serve as
continuing points of reference.
To signal these key Themes to your reader, use Strings of repeated or related
words which can occur anywhere in your sentences, except as characters. You can
strategically use Thematic Strings to guide your readers along as they read, to
continually reinforce your points about the story you’re telling.
How Thematic Strings Go Wrong
The major function of Thematic Strings is to keep a reader on track, to keep in the
forefront of a reader’s mind those ideas that are central to your discussion.
Thematic Strings are a major source of the continuity and unity of your text. A
Thematic String is an invitation to a reader to see and remember a relationship
connecting the different parts of your story. Perhaps most importantly, unlike the
sentence-level structures we’ve discussed previously, Thematic Strings that are
properly managed tend to be remembered. When you make your Thematic Strings
out of the words and concepts most important to your point, you are most likely to
prompt readers to remember your argument in the way you want.
Thematic Strings in an entire section or document are more likely to go wrong
than Thematic Strings in a paragraph, although they can go wrong even there.
Thematic Strings tend to go wrong in three ways:
1. Too much variation
A Thematic String is any series of repeated or related words. If you use too many
different words and phrases to name a concept or a group of related concepts, your
reader may not be able to see their relationship, especially when your reader is less
knowledgeable than you (as in most professional writing situations). Readers who
know a lot about your subject will tend to be better at seeing the connection in a
group of different but related words and phrases. Readers who know very little
will not see those connections well at all. And in any case, all readers will do
better when you take charge of your material and use a small set of words that you
have consciously selected. Only the very rare writer repeats the relationships
between his concepts too often.
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2. Wrong or Inappropriate Thematic String
Sometimes a writer focuses on a set of concepts or an idea which is not her best
selling point given the context of her document, the problem she wants to solve.
For example, in example 2 in this session, the writer has probably not picked the
best rhetorical strategy for persuading Mr. Smith to become a client of the
University Partners Program. By focusing her letter around ideas like how
students benefit and how the university is doing the client organization a large
favor, the writer uses her Thematic Strings to make the wrong – the less effective
– appeal.
3. Too little notice or wrong promise
Your readers need to know, when they begin reading your document, what will be
the key words that show up in the important Thematic Strings. You can’t afford to
let your readers recognize an important Thematic String after it is well under way
– your readers will have failed to understand and remember your story at all, or
they will have remembered a version of it other than the one you’d prefer. Take
special care to announce in the opening segment those major category terms that
will be the central words or phrases for your major Thematic Strings. In general,
you should always announce in that crucial opening segment what your readers
should expect in the rest of the text.
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Point: The Rhetorical Telegram
Coherent units of discourse are built around a sentence or a short sequence of
sentences that you could send as a telegram. We call this telegram the Point of the
unit. If the unit is a paragraph, the Point is usually just a single sentence, or even
part of a sentence; if the unit is a short report or a series of paragraphs constituting
a section, the telegram transmitting the Point might be a couple of sentences. In a
much longer work, the telegram might be as much as a paragraph.
The Point is NOT what the reader infers as the gist or main idea or purpose for
writing. Rather, the Point is a sentence on the page, a sentence (or two or three)
that the writer could point to, underline, read aloud, that she would offer to
someone who wanted to send a telegram capturing the claim for which the rest of
the unit exists. The Point answers the question, “So what?”
If the Point is the Point of the whole memo, article, report, proposal, or book, we
call it the Global Point. Global Points ordinarily occur in one of two places:
1. In most academic and professional writing, the Global Point occurs at the end
of the Global Issue. Practically speaking, this means that the reader feels that
the Point comes first. Only very rarely, however, will the Point ever actually
be the first sentence of the text.
2. In certain kinds of writing, including several kinds of academic writing, the
Global Point appears at the end of the whole text. These kinds of writing
include newspaper editorials and newspaper columns, some persuasive letters,
belletristic essays, etc.
This does not mean that the Point must come at the end of these kinds of texts,
only that it MAY. You put the Global Point at the end of the whole unit of
discourse when you want for some reason to show your reader how you reached
your Global Point. For example, you may be writing to a reader who is
unreceptive to what you have to say, who may not even believe that the problem
you want to solve exists. In such a case, you might want to make the case for your
problem and for the feasibility of your solution before you make your request for
action.
There are two corollary rules associated with making points:
1. The Politeness Rule: Unless you are writing a long document or section, you
can make your point only once per unit of discourse. Most readers will think
you pushy, rude, overly insistent if you make your point more than once at the
same level (more than once in a paragraph, more than once in a section, more
than once in a document, etc.). It is, however, acceptable to repeat the point of
a large section as the point of one of its sub-sections. Yet even then, many
readers get impatient with writers who repeat their points very often.
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NOTE: There are two instances in which most readers will prefer that you
make your Point more than once even in short documents: (1) In most letters
and memos, you should state your Global Point (or a brief summary of it) in
the subject line as well as in the text itself; and (2) in most letters, memos, and
reports, you should make your Section Points in your headings as well as in
the text of the sections themselves. Or, each heading should serve as a kind of
launching point for your section. This is what textbooks mean when they say
subject lines and headings should be “direct” and “informative.”
2. The Rule of Relevance: A unit of discourse should include only information
that helps to make the Point of the unit. It is not enough that the information
be on the Topic; it must also be to the Point. Writers who violate the rule of
relevance take significant risks. When a reader unexpectedly encounters
information that is on the Topic but beside the Point, he will often try to
reinterpret the Point to make the recalcitrant material relevant. Since getting
the Point is the key to understanding, you cannot afford to have readers try to
reinterpret a Point they otherwise would have understood.
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When the Main Point Is Not in the Issue
Every unit of discourse must have a single main Point. It may be expressed in the
Hot Spot at the end of the Issue. Or it may be expressed at the end of the
Discussion.
In paragraphs or short sections, if you save the main Point for the end of the
Discussion, you must still make some kind of point in the Hot Spot at the end of
the Issue. That Launching Point must suggest, lead up to, or otherwise anticipate
the main Point. Its function, of course, is to launch the reader forward into the rest
of the unit.
For entire documents in most business and professional settings, readers expect
the Global Point of the document to come at the end of the Global Issue. There are
a few situations in which professional writers save the Global Point for the end of
the Discussion, and some academic or belletristic writers routinely save their
Global Point for the end of the Discussion. However, documents which save the
Global Point for the end are normally harder to read than documents which put the
Global Point near the beginning, at the end of the Issue. So, if you do save your
Global Point for the end, you have additional responsibilities.
If you position your Global Point at the end of your document, you must be certain
that at the end of the Global Issue, you have another strong sentence promising
your reader that an important Global Point awaits. That is, if you position your
Global Point at the end of your essay, you have to construct a Launching Point
and position it at the end of your Global Issue, in the Hot Spot. That Launching
Point must
1. promise to pay-off the reader for the attention you are demanding;
2. establish particularly rich Thematic Strings that will lead the reader to the
Global Point.
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On the Style of Point Sentences
. . . Point Sentences have to be clear, specific, and prominent.
 Know where to put them.
•
The Global Point Sentence should be positioned either at the end of the Issue,
or at the end of the Discussion.
•
Major Sub-Point Sentences (the Point of a large chunk of discourse) should
be positioned either at the end of the Issue of the chunk, or at the end of the
Discussion of the section.
•
Paragraph Point Sentences frequently occur as the last sentence of the Issue
of the paragraph. This usually means the Paragraph Point is one of the first
three sentences of the paragraph. Otherwise, the Paragraph Point is the last
sentence of the paragraph.
 Know how to phrase them.
•
Avoid Metadiscourse. Don’t talk about yourself or your paper in an
introductory subject-verb pair. State your Point directly.
1a.
This analysis will consider the central role of family education in successful
behavior modification programs.
1b. In successful behavior modification programs, family education plays a central
role.
2a.
This report will discuss GM’s acquisition strategy from its birth in 1908
through the 1930’s.
Notice that we cannot simply translate sentence 2a into one with an obvious
Point, because the new sentence would only assert that GM had an acquisition
strategy. That is always a problem with topic-announcing Preliminary Points.
If, however, everyone believed GM did not have an acquisition strategy, then
the Point could be stated this way:
2b. But in fact, GM did have an acquisition strategy from its birth in 1908 through
the 1930’s.
•
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Put the crucial words in the Stress position (crucial words are italicized).
a.
The American agricultural surplus has taken on greater importance as rising costs
of imported petroleum and other goods have increased the U.S. trade deficit.
American farmers now account for 43% of the world’s commerce in coarse
grains. Agricultural foreign trade maintains profitable market prices for the
American farmer and bolsters the national economy by providing over one million
jobs. Income from farm surplus sold abroad is used to purchase about $9 billion
worth of farm machinery and equipment annually . . . .
b.
As rising costs of imported petroleum and other goods have increased the U.S.
trade deficit, the American agricultural surplus has taken on greater importance.
American farmers now account for 43% of the world’s commerce in coarse
grains. Agricultural foreign trade maintains profitable market prices for the
American farmer and bolsters the national economy by providing over one million
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jobs. Income from farm surplus sold abroad is used to purchase about $9 billion
worth of farm machinery and equipment annually. . . .
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Signal that you are making a Point. Use explicit verbal signs that a Point is
coming when you don’t trust your readers to recognize your Point. But use
them sparingly.
The point is. . . .
In short, . . .
Most significantly, . . .
Or, assert something then deny it. If a sentence occurs near the beginning of a
paragraph, section, or essay and begins with but, however, nevertheless, etc.,
that sentence will almost certainly be the most important sentence of the Issue,
and therefore the Point of the Issue.
 Know how often to use them.
Think of a document longer than three pages as a long circus tent. If you put up a
pole at the two ends, it will sag in the middle. Don’t let more than three pages go
by without restating your Point or, if you are moving toward your point,
synthesizing the Points you have made so far into a tentative Point. You have to
prop up the tent every few yards. Otherwise it hides everything you want to show.
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Revising on the Page
Problems with Thematic Coherence
Diagnose You probably have a problem with Themes if you. . .
1.Draw a line under the first six or seven words and DO find the name of a
character that you have heard of before.
2.Circle the key words in the Issue of the chunk and DO NOT find those words
or closely related words repeated regularly through the chunk.
3.Circle the key words in the sentence or paragraph that makes the main point of
the chunk and DO NOT find those words or closely related words repeated
regularly through the chunk.
Revise
1.Circle the key words in the sentence or paragraph that summarizes, gives the
“bottom line,” or makes the main point of the chunk.
2.Circle the key words in the opening segment of the chunk.
3.Make sure that the key words you circled in step 1 are the same or very close to
the words you circled in step 2.
4.Drop in the key words you circled throughout the chunk, at least two or three
times per page.
5.If the key words just will not fit into the body of the chunk, then you have
either to rewrite the chunk or rewrite the opening segment and the main point.
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Frequently Asked Questions
?
“Won’t my documents sound repetitive if I keep using the same words over
and over again?”
First of all, you don’t absolutely have to use the same word over and over, but that is one
good way to make sure that you don’t have a problem with Thematic Strings. Readers are
even less likely to notice repeated words in Thematic Strings than in Topic Strings.
For those times when you cannot use or prefer not to use repeated words in your
Thematic Strings, the first step is to make sure that the related words that refer to the
same general concept are in fact related enough in the minds of your readers. Then, once
you have selected a group of words that you are sure your readers will recognize as a
group, there are two things you can do to help your readers see the relationship:
1. Be sure that in the opening of the chunk you use (1) the most familiar term for each
key concept and (2) the most general “category term” for each key concept and (3) the
word that you will in fact repeat most often. (It is better if these are all the same term,
but if necessary you can use three terms – most familiar, most general, most often
repeated – in close proximity.)
2. When you mention a key word that is less obviously related to your key concept for
the first time in your document, or for the first time in a few pages or so, mention this
word in connection with another key word that you are certain your reader will
recognize.
?
“What do I do if the key concepts in my opening are not the same as those in
the rest of my paper?”
You have three choices. The least successful is to force the Concepts in the opening into
the rest of the paper, whether they fit or not. (Do that only when you have no more than
two minutes to revise.) The other two choices are to rewrite the opening section or to
rewrite the rest of the paper. Sometimes, you will have written an opening that promises a
much better paper than you’ve actually written, in which case you may feel compelled to
rewrite the rest of the paper. But most of the time, it’s a heck of a lot easier to fix the
opening.
?
“Sometimes I don’t want to state my Point directly in a sentence or two.
Sometimes I want to be more subtle, and sometimes my Point is too complex to
be reduced to a sentence.”
Maybe. And maybe not. When you have a Point worth making – and you understand it
fully yourself – you won’t often feel the need to avoid making it. We aren’t saying that
everything you say in your document should or could be reduced to a sentence, an actual
telegram sent via Western Union; what we are saying is that a Point should be a part of
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Frequently Asked Questions
your text, a part whose function will be to help your reader organize her understanding
and memory of what you wrote. With your best statement of your Point, your reader can
organize her understanding and memory in a useful way – to a limited degree, in your
way. Points are one of the key features that let you have a say in how your reader
understands and remembers.
So you can always decide that your Point is too subtle or complex to be said outright – so
long as you also recognize that you are leaving it up to your reader to discover some Point
around which to organize what you say. And that you risk having your reader miss your
Point. Or infer one quite different from what you intended. Or decide that what you have
to say is Point-less.
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