Fluency: Varying Sentence
Structure
HOW CAN I GET MY STUDENTS TO INFUSE
THE ADVANCED SENTENCE STRUCTURES
THEY LEARN INTO THEIR WRITING?????
WRITE!!!
 You have five minutes to write about WHATEVER
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


you want
Audience: Teachers (professional writing)
Purpose: You choose
Remember, based on your audience, it should be
academically sound writing (follow the rules)
If you can’t think of anything, write about your day
today, or a problem you have had this week
What is fluency???
Instructions:
Sentence Fluency (based on the 6+1 rubric)
PUT YOUR WRITING
AWAY – WE’LL COME
BACK TO IT. FIRST, I
NEED TO BRIEF YOU
ON THE WHERE MY
STUDENTS WOULD
BE BEFORE I WOULD
TEACH THIS LESSON!
Advanced/5: The writing has a natural flow and
rhythm.
A. Varied sentence structure and length
demonstrate conscious planning.
B. The sentences are rhythmic and graceful.
Acceptable/3: The writing moves mechanically.
A. The writer shows control over simple sentence
structure, but uses complex sentences infrequently.
B. The sentence rhythm is attmpted but
inconsistent.
Unacceptable/1: The writing moves awkwardly.
A. The sentences tend to be choppy, incomplete, or
rambling.
B. The sentence rhythm is clumsy and jarring.
What we’ve covered at this point:
1) Add an infinitive phrase:
Before: All I wanted to do was improve my score in timed writing and getting those improved scores became
very important to me.
After: To improve my timed writing score I should practice timed writing.
2) Use a subordinating conjunction to combine sentences:
Before: I thought I did excellent on my timed writing test. My grade was much lower than I thought.
After: I thought I did excellent on my timed writing test until I saw my grade.
3) Change a statement to a question in quotes:
Before: My friend and I thought about abandoning our friend as the bear attacked.
After: I turned to Bill and asked, "Should we warn Terrance or just go?"
4) Add a present participial phrase (that's a phrase beginning with a word that ends in 'ing').
Before: We ran faster than we had ever run before as the big bear ripped out Terrance's guts with its paw.
After: Looking on in dismay as the bear ripped out Terrance's guts, we awoke from our startled state
and ran.
5) Join two sentences with a comma and a coordinating conjunction (and, but, for, nor, yet, so) and
create a compound sentence.
Before: We knew we didn't have to outrun the bear. We had to run a little bit faster than Terrance.
After: We knew we didn't have to outrun the bear, but we did have to outrun Terrance.
6) Add dialogue:
Before: We told Terrance to get out of the tent and run.
After: I yelled, "Terrance, there's a grizzly bear outside the tent! Run!"
7) Start with an ly word:
Before: I was sad when I saw Terrance's body strewn across the mountain.
After: Sadly, we looked at Terrance's mangled body.
8) Start the sentence with a prepositional phrase:
Before: I ran really fast the moment I saw Terrance's arm torn off and thrown across the campsite.
After: At that moment, I ran faster than I'd ever run.
How I taught the info on the previous slide.
 I fell and hurt my knee. I was running too fast.
 Combine these sentences and start it with an verb that ends in
–ing.
 Start a sentence with a word that ends in –ly
 Go through the stages of showing students, giving direct
instruction to mimic (like in the 2nd bullet point), and having
them create their own sentences that mimic the structure
 Spend time having students re-order their own sentences so
they learn how to add introductory clauses by restructuring
 Consider creating a sentence wall where you collect sentences
that follow various structures
Now, OBSERVE!
Short Choppy 3rd grade:
Poetry is difficult. I don't write it
very well. My English professor in college
agrees with me. He sent me a book. He sent
me Poetry for Dummies. I felt stupid after
seeing it. I still talk to the professor. We
don't talk much about poetry. He sent me
that book, after all. We do talk about our
chidren. I asked for his recommendation on
poetry books for children. He suggested
something to me. He suggested they teach
me poetry. He really humiliated me. I am
over it now. I talked to my therapist about
it. I decided to do a poetry extravaganza. I
went to the library with my kids. I chose 20
poetry books. They voted on the top 5.
That's why I'm writing this.
The opposite problem!
Poetry, the bane of my
existence, an activity, enjoyed by my
English professor that tormented me, a
college graduate, for many years. My
professor, still a good friend of mine
who converses with me from time to
time about literature and other tidbits,
told me I was not very good at poetry,
going as far as to send me a copy of a
book, a rather useful yet insulting book,
entitled Poetry for Dummies, which,
although intended as humor, hurt my
feelings. I talked to my therapist, a
rather good man who, like me, has a
general disdain for poetry, and he told
me I should have a poetry extravaganza
with my children--Tom, Joe, and Mary-and let them see if they enjoy poetry.
The invitation to appreciate:
On one corner of my dresser sits a smiling toy clown on a tiny
unicycle--a gift I received last Christmas from a close friend. The
clown's short yellow hair, made of yarn, covers its ears but is parted
above the eyes. The blue eyes are outlined in black with thin, dark
lashes flowing from the brows. It has cherry-red cheeks, nose, and
lips, and its broad grin disappears into the wide, white ruffle around
its neck. The clown wears a fluffy, two-tone nylon costume. The left
side of the outfit is light blue, and the right side is red. The two
colors merge in a dark line that runs down the center of the small
outfit. Surrounding its ankles and disguising its long black shoes are
big pink bows. The white spokes on the wheels of the unicycle
gather in the center and expand to the black tire so that the wheel
somewhat resembles the inner half of a grapefruit. The clown and
unicycle together stand about a foot high. As a cherished gift from
my good friend Tran, this colorful figure greets me with a smile
every time I enter my room.
Let’s practice different structures so that we can
infuse them into our writing.
 Each small group will receive a packet of sentence
puzzle pieces
 The pieces are color coded: red goes with red, blue
with blue, etc.
 For each same-colored group of puzzle pieces, create
as many different sentences as you can. Use
different types of clauses and different structures.
With each sentence you create, you will have to leave
out certain pieces.
 You have 15 minutes
PRACTICE
How many different
sentences structures
can you create with the
following components?
BECAUSE
ZOEY SAID THANK YOU
TRYING TO BE POLITE
.
Example:
Intro clause with a
conjunction:
Because the girl said
thank you, Grandma
gave her more food.
,
;
WHEN
GRANDMA GAVE HER MORE FOOD
Other sentences:
 Trying to be polite, Zoey said thank you when
Grandma gave her more food. (complex)
 When Grandma gave her more food, Zoey said thank
you. (complex)
 Grandma gave Zoey more food (simple)
 Grandma gave Zoey more food; she said thank you.
(compound)
Return to your writing
 Variable B: Count the number of sentences that start
the word “the,” “there,” or a subject.
 Variable A: Count the number of sentences that start
with a word a present progressive verb (-ing), an
adverb (-ly), a preposition, or a conjunction
(because, but, etc.)
 Write your calculations as A:B
 At minimum, your ratio should be one to one. If
you’re already there, challenge yourself to increase it
to 3:1.
Revision stage
 After having students calculate their a to be ratio, I
would normally have them revise their work. On
another day I would implement another revision
exercise:
 Highlight:
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
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YELLOW: Simple sentences (one independent clause
consisting of a subject and predicate.)
PINK: Compound sentences (two independent clauses joined
by a comma and a conjunction or a semicolon)
ORANGE: Complex sentences (an independent clause
preceded by or followed by a dependent clause)
REVISE!
 Rewrite your paragraph incorporating all three
sentence structures, and working to improve your
improve your fluency ratio
Sources:
 Everyday Editing by Jeff Anderson
 Mechanically Inclined by Jeff Anderson
 Mini Lessons for Revision by Susan Geye
 Mrs. Sherman – an English teacher from high school