Last Name 1
Student Name
Mrs. Benke
English III
September 29, 2014
Title of My Wonderful Paper
Intro paragraphs can start broad about the general topic. They can begin with an
anecdote, which is a little story that helps the reader get in the frame of thought of the paper
itself, or this paragraph can begin with a scenario, which is like a generic anecdote, giving a
situation related to the topic. Finally, the last sentence of the introductory paragraph is your
thesis sentence, an opinion statement about your topic. (What you do NOT see in this paragraph
is a rhetorical question or facts from your sources.)
Altitude sickness impairs or hinders a person in many ways. Some of the symptoms
include “weakness, shortness of breath upon exertion and decreased coordination” (“Altitude”
21). This evidence confirms that higher altitude will negatively affect a person’s state of mind.
Upon analysis of these symptoms, the higher one climbs, the weaker he or she will become. As
stated by Jon Krakauer in his book Into Thin Air, an interview with Dale Kruse, a mountain
climber, reveals that he “had an incredibly difficult time simply trying to dress himself”
(Krakauer 140). This shows that an illness of this nature makes the simplest tasks seem complex.
Furthermore, someone who is not a seasoned climber, should prepare him/herself properly.
Subsequently, following up on Druse’s interview, he claims to have “ ‘completely lost the ability
to think or speak’ “ (Krakauer 140). This is relevant because the symptoms can become so
serious that this condition may be considered life-threatening. (You will add several more body
Last Name 2
paragraphs, of course. THEN, your last page of your paper will be the Works Cited – on a page
of its own, like the one below listing all of the sources you used. According to the paragraph I
have above, I should have two sources).
Works Cited
“Altitude Illness.” World of Sports Science. Ed. K.Lee Lerner and Brenda Wilmoth Lerner. Vol.
1. Detroit: Gale, 2007. 21-22. Gale Virtual Reference Library. Web. 8 June 2011.
Krakuer, Jon. Into Thin Air: A Personal Account of the Mount Everest Disaster. New York:
Villard, 1997 Print. 140-150.