Series Title: “LEARNING TO RECOGNISE AND REMOVE BARRIERS TO HEALING”
TOPIC No. 2
“THE BARRIERS
COMING FROM
WRONG ATTITUDES
TO OTHER PEOPLE”
Topic 2. Canon Jim Holbeck
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The Barriers
The barriers are like bricks preventing God’s grace and healing
being received by those who maintain those attitudes
1. Expressing no love
or compassion to
others.
An inability or
unwillingness to
love others.
2. Harbouring
Bitterness and
Resentment against
others
Topic 2. Canon Jim Holbeck
3. Unforgiveness. An
unwillingness to
forgive others
2
1). NO LOVE AND COMPASSION
AN INABILITY OR UNWILLINGNESS TO
LOVE OTHERS
Topic 2. Canon Jim Holbeck
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God’s purpose for the human race
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It was expressed in both the Old and New Testaments. To
love God. To love our neighbour
It was summed up by Jesus in the form of the two Great
Commandments. Mk 12:29 Jesus answered, "The most
important is, 'Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is
one. 30 And you shall love the Lord your God with all your
heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and
with all your strength.'
31 The second is this: 'You shall love your neighbour as
yourself.' There is no other commandment greater than
these."
Topic 2. Canon Jim Holbeck
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Love for others was commanded in both Old and
New Testaments
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Commanded through Moses
(Lev 19:18) You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge
against the sons of your own people, but you shall love your
neighbour as yourself: I am the LORD.
Commanded through Jesus
As above in Mk 12:29-31 and also in the Sermon on the Mount
in Mat 5:43-44 where Jesus affirmed the Old Testament
teaching and added to it in terms of even loving enemies. "You
have heard that it was said, 'You shall love your neighbour and
hate your enemy.' 44 But I say to you, Love your enemies and
pray for those who persecute you
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Love for others was commanded in both Old and New Testaments (continued)
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Paul expressed it. He saw that if people really loved one
another then they would not sin against each other.
They would not break the commandments in the
Decalogue if they were loving their neighbours. (Rom
13:9) The commandments, "You shall not commit
adultery, You shall not murder, You shall not steal, You
shall not covet," and any other commandment, are
summed up in this word: "You shall love your neighbour as
yourself."
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Love for others was commanded in both Old and New Testaments (continued)

Paul saw the law being fulfilled through love. The whole
law could be summed up in the one command to love one’s
neighbour. Gal 5:14 For the whole law is fulfilled in one word:
"You shall love your neighbour as yourself.“

James commented on the importance of love to one’s
neighbour. Jas 2:8, If you really fulfill the royal law
according to the Scripture, "You shall love your neighbour as
yourself," you are doing well.
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Love for others was commanded in both Old and New Testaments (continued)
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Love for one’s neighbour doesn’t come naturally.
Many people are unable to love as they should.
Our ability to love is a sign that we have become
spiritually alive or born again. John put it, 1Jn 3:14 We
know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love
the brothers. Whoever does not love abides in death.

Such love for one another is a sign of His presence
within us by His Spirit. 1Jn 4:12 No one has ever seen God; if
we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in
us.
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Love for others was commanded in both Old and New Testaments (continued)
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God can motivate us by His Spirit to do that which we were not
capable of doing before. How?
John’s answer. 1Jn 4:19 We love because he first loved us.
Responding to His love for us releases love within us for Him but
AND for our fellow humans.
Paul’s answer. Rom 5:5. True love comes from God Himself and
is imparted to His people by His Spirit, God's love has been
poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to
us.
Peter observed. 1 Pet 1:22. Genuine love for others comes from
those who live in obedience to the truth. Now that you have
purified your souls by your obedience to the truth so that you have
genuine mutual love, love one another deeply from the heart.
Topic 2. Canon Jim Holbeck
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AN OBSERVATION ON MINISTRY
One of the great delights in Christian ministry.
 Seeing people who once were unloving being
transformed into sensitive, thoughtful, loving and
caring people.
 That should be happening as people are transformed
more and more by the Spirit of God into the likeness
of Christ. 2Cor 3:18 And we all, with unveiled face, beholding
the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same
image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from
the Lord who is the Spirit.
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AN OBSERVATION ON MINISTRY (continued)
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One of the sadnesses of ministry
Seeing people choose not to love other people as God
commanded them to do.
Refusing to love, places them outside God’s will as John
wrote, Jn 13:34 I give you a new commandment, that
you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also
should love one another.
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They are accountable to God for their unwillingness to
love.
They have failed to appropriate the grace of God which
would enable them to love.
Their attitude is a barrier to their healing and blessing.
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2). HARBOURING BITTERNESS
OR
RESENTMENT
Topic 2. Canon Jim Holbeck
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2). HARBOURING BITTERNESS OR RESENTMENT (continued)
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Why do people become bitter and resentful? Many
different reasons.
The dangers of bitterness and resentment. (If we allow
them to take root and “simmer” within us without dealing
with them).
The Greek word for “bitterness” is pikria. From that word
comes “picric” acid which is noted for its extremely bitter
taste, its instability and its explosive force.
One might say that bitterness is like a vile acid eating
away within us or an instability within us waiting to
explode.
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2). HARBOURING BITTERNESS OR RESENTMENT (continued)
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The Palmist in Ps 73 spoke of his bitterness and the
effect it had on him, 21 When my soul was
embittered, when I was pricked in heart, 22 I was
stupid and ignorant; I was like a brute beast toward
you.
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He lost control and began to act like an animal rather
than as a rational human being.
Bitterness can twist or distort the mind (as well as the
intestines.)
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Bitterness. Pikria. (Noun)
Examples of bitterness in the Bible
 Arising from jealousy or covetousness. In Acts 8 we read
of Simon who before his conversion was heavily involved
in magic and called himself “somebody great”.
 Peter and John came down to Samaria and laid hands on
the new converts. We read, Act 8:18 Now when Simon saw
that the Spirit was given through the laying on of the apostles'
hands, he offered them money, 19 saying, "Give me this power
also, so that anyone on whom I lay my hands may receive the
Holy Spirit."
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Bitterness. Pikria. (Noun) (continued)
Peter recognised that Simon was jealous of the
apostles and covetous. Acts 8:20 But Peter said to him, "May
your silver perish with you, because you thought you could obtain the
gift of God with money! 21 … your heart is not right before God. 22
Repent, therefore, of this wickedness of yours, and pray to the Lord
that, if possible, the intent of your heart may be forgiven you. 23 For I
see that you are in the gall of bitterness and in the bond of iniquity." 24
And Simon answered, "Pray for me to the Lord, that nothing of what
you have said may come upon me.“
Jealousy and being covetous of what another person
has, leads to bitterness of soul.
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Bitterness. Pikria. (Noun) (continued)
Arising from our speech. There may be bitterness in the way
we speak to or about other people. Paul warned in Eph 4:29
Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such
as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give
grace to those who hear. 30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of
God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.
How could they grieve the Spirit? By uttering hurtful or
damaging words. Eph 4:31 Let all bitterness and wrath and
anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with
all malice. 32 Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving
one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
Topic 2. Canon Jim Holbeck
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Bitterness. Pikria. (Noun) (continued)
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Arising from being discontented and critical of others.
Instead of striving for peace and being holy oneself
we verbalise our bitterness and affect others as a
result. Heb 12:14 Strive for peace with everyone, and
for the holiness without which no one will see the
Lord. 15 See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace
of God; that no "root of bitterness" springs up and
causes trouble, and by it many become defiled
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Bitterness. Pikria. (Noun) (continued)
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Arising within a marriage. Paul challenged Christian husbands
in a time when the rights of women were not respected, Col
3:19. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh (bitter)
with them. Pikrainō, (Verb form of pikria).
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From being jealous of other people. Or from having selfish
ambitions. Jas 3:14 But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish
ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth.
(Bitter=Pikros is an adjective). 15 This is not the wisdom that
comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic.
16 For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be
disorder and every vile practice.
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Bitterness. Pikria. (Noun) (continued)
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BITTERNESS is a MASSIVE BARRIER to receiving
God’s blessing and healing.
How do you get rid of it? Ignore it? Excuse it? Deny it?
Try to taper it down? None of these work.
St Paul has a good answer for bitterness. His advice in
Eph 4:31 (NIV) is Get rid of all bitterness, rage and
anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of
malice.
Topic 2. Canon Jim Holbeck
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Resentment
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There are few references in the Bible to “resentment” as such
but it can describe someone who has been ignored or rejected
and who keeps on thinking about how badly they were treated.
It is an inner “smouldering.”
King Ahab was resentful when Naboth refused to give or sell
his vineyard to him, 1 Kings 21:4, Ahab went home resentful
and sullen because of what Naboth the Jezreelite had said to
him; for he had said, "I will not give you my ancestral
inheritance." He lay down on his bed, turned away his face, and
would not eat.
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His wife Jezebel responded to his resentment by having Naboth
falsely accused and put to death to enable Ahab to claim the
vineyard.
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Resentment (continued)
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In 1 Cor 13:5 Paul describes love in this way, It does not
insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful (ESV).
The word for “resentful” literally means, “thinking about
the evil”.
Love then means not focussing on the evil which had been
directed towards oneself but letting it go.
Resentment is closely allied to unforgiveness. It can go
from a person when they get round to forgiving the person
with whom they are angry.
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Resentment (continued)
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If we are RESENTFUL AGAINST GOD then that must cease.
God will never ask us to forgive Him, for He as the judge
of all the earth never does anything wrong.
Instead we need to ask God to forgive us for holding
resentment against Him.
If we are RESENTFUL AGAINST OTHERS then that too has
to cease.
We are to forgive and to let go, rather than refusing to
forgive and deliberately holding on to the resentment.
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3).
UNFORGIVENESS
AN UNWILLINGNESS TO FORGIVE
OTHERS
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3).
UNFORGIVENESS. AN UNWILLINGNESS TO FORGIVE OTHERS
(continued)
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We all need to experience the release of being
forgiven by God.
We also need to know the release that comes as we
actually forgive other people.
Forgiveness is not an option.
It is a command from God Himself and to hold on to
unforgiveness is to remain outside His revealed will
for us.
That has consequences for every part of our lives,
physically, emotionally and spiritually.
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The dangers of unforgiveness
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Jesus taught about the dangers of unforgiveness in
the “Parable of the Unforgiving Servant.
True forgiveness as seen in the Master had 3 main
elements.
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a) a decision to show mercy,
b) cancelling the debt owed and
c) letting the sinner go free.
The unmerciful servant refused to do any of these.
Jesus said that the unforgiving servant was “handed
over to the jailers to be tortured”.
When people refuse to forgive they expose
themselves to “self-inflicted” torture.
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What it means to forgive
The New Testament words for “forgive” indicate that
forgiveness brings freedom and release to those who do it.
There are three main words for “forgive”.
The first is “apoluō” meaning to let go or to release, such as
in Lk 6:37 "Judge not, and you will not be judged;
condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and
you will be forgiven.
In the letting go of others’ sins we can be released ourselves.
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What it means to forgive (continued)
The second word is “aphiēmi” meaning to remit, to
loose, to divorce, to let go, to forgive, and it is the
usual word for forgiveness in the New Testament.
It is used for example in the Lord’s Prayer, Mat 6:12
and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven
our debtors.
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What it means to forgive (continued)
The third word is “charizomai” coming from “charis”
meaning grace.
It is used in Eph 4:32 Be kind to one another,
tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in
Christ forgave you
and in Col 3:13
bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint
against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord
has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.
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What it means to forgive (continued)
In these verses the emphasis is on the need to imitate
God in His forgiveness of us.
He forgives us freely in Christ and we are meant to do
the same.
We could never deserve or earn our forgiveness from
God, yet in grace He chose to forgive us.
The people we need to forgive could likewise never
deserve or earn our forgiveness, but in grace following
God’s example, we can choose to forgive them.
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The Consequences Of Unforgiveness Mat 18:31-35
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Accountability before God. The unforgiving servant
was accountable to God
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If we refuse to forgive others we too are guilty
before God. (Suppressing guilt does not get rid of it).
We reap what we sow. The first servant felt that
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He did not need to show compassion.
He felt that every debt should be paid.
He wanted to live by the application of law and not by
grace.
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The Consequences Of Unforgiveness Mat 18:31-35 (continued)
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The master withdrew his compassion and law
came into force. Mat 18:34 And in anger his master
delivered him to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay
all his debt.
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Unforgiveness leads to imprisonment. Until we
forgive people we are bound to them in a negative
way and what they said or did still controls us.
Forgiving them brings us release and freedom.
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SUMMING UP
The attitudes expressed as the bricks in this wall below
are major factors in not being able to receive God’s
blessing and healing.
1. Expressing no love or
compassion to others.
An inability or
unwillingness to love
others.
2. Harbouring
Bitterness and
Resentment against
others
3. Unforgiveness. An
unwillingness to forgive
others
The healing comes as we allow God to dismantle the wall to
allow His grace to flow into our lives
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How can we allow God to dismantle the wall? Getting
rid of the barriers
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1). By confessing our sins before Him and asking for His
forgiveness in Christ as our Saviour.
2). By asking God to fill us with His Holy Spirit Eph 5:18 …do not
get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit,
3). By allowing His love to fill our hearts and to flow out through
us into the lives of other people especially those we need to
forgive. Rom 5:5 and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love
has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given
to us
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4). By specifically forgiving everyone we need to forgive. How?
By following the steps of true forgiveness.
Topic 2. Canon Jim Holbeck
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Getting rid of the Barriers
The steps of true forgiveness. Mat 18:27
1).
Deciding to show mercy to them.
(Gracing them with something they could never earn or
deserve).
2).
us.
Cancelling the debts they owe us due to their sin against
(Letting all those sins go)
3).
Letting them go free off the hook of our unforgiveness.
(Letting them go free)
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THE RESULT?
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As we release the sins of the other people against us
and let them off the hook of our unforgiveness WE
BECOME FREE
We should forgive
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Because God commanded us to do so
Because it is foolish not to
Otherwise we remain bound to those who hurt us and
without trying to, they will still dictate the rest of our
lives.
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THE END
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