Writing an essay
introduction
Your full introduction has 3 parts:
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Hook/Lead: literally “hooks” the reader
Connecting Details: reasons why
Thesis: states main argument with subject and
opinion
It’s like a sandwich….the meat =
connecting details, with the hook and thesis
being the bread!
I’m the connecting
details!
SOMEWHERE WITHIN THE 3 PARTS OF
YOUR INTRO. YOU NEED TO INCLUDE
DEMOCRATIC IDEALS AND
CONSTITUTIONAL PRINCIPLES
(see handout)
Democratic Ideals: the standards we
live by in our government
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Justice = fairness
Equality = the state of being alike in status/nature
Life = existence
Pursuit of Happiness = the right to find
happiness
Liberty = freedom from oppression
Common Good = something that benefits all
Diversity = individual difference/uniqueness
Truth = an indisputable fact
Popular Sovereignty = voting
Connecting your topic to the ideal…
Write your topic in the “my topic” circle on
your paper.
 Now, create a web that illustrates the
relationship between your topic and the
democratic ideal.
EXAMPLE:

EQUALITY – If equality
is an ideal valued by our
country, how is it that all
people are not treated
equally in the eyes of the
law?
GAY
MARRIAGE
Constitutional Principles = Rules/Guidelines
that must be followed by gov’t:
Rule of law = law applies to EVERYONE, even gov’t
Separation of Powers = division of gov’t authority among
the 3 branches
Representative Government = a gov’t where citizens take
part through elected officials who act on their behalf
Checks & Balances = a process that allows each branch of
government to limit the power of the other branches
Civil Rights = rights of individuals to get equal treatment
Human Rights = fundamental rights possessed by all
humans
Federalism = Government that is divided between a central
government (Washington DC) and more localized
governments (states, cities, etc.)
Connecting your topic to the
PRINCIPLE…
Now, create the last side of the web that
illustrates the relationship between your topic
and the Constitutional Principle.
EXAMPLE:

GAY
MARRIAGE
CIVIL RIGHTS – All
individuals are entitled to equal
treatment, so this violates the
14th amendment’s right of
equal protection under the
laws.
YOUR INTRO TASK:
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
You must include AT LEAST TWO Democratic
Ideals and/or Constitutional Principles in your
intro paragraph. More would be better, but at least
two are required (you can have one from each list,
or two from one…just have two!).
Your topic sentences for body paragraphs should
include mention of the Ideals or Principles-- let
these guide each essay paragraph!
The hook (a.k.a. lead)
 There
1.Hook
2.Conn. Details
3.Thesis
are my types of hooks.
Let’s look at your handout for
examples…
Connecting details: These are the
three reasons you’ll use to prove your
thesis…
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Connecting details lead to your thesis…they are
the reasons you’ll use to prove your thesis
Your paper will have three body paragraphs;
each will focus on a different idea that will prove
your thesis. If you list these main ideas before
your thesis, they become your connecting
details.
Connecting Details Example:
Hook: Close your eyes. Imagine being forced to pray to a god in which you
don’t believe. Or being tortured for criticizing your leaders. Or being arrested
for participating in an anti-government rally. Imagine living in a country
without freedom of religion, speech or assembly. Luckily, we Americans
possess all of these basic human rights and don’t have to.
Connecting Details: In this country, both our citizens and news mediums have
the freedom to express what they deem important. We can practice religion
without interference from the government, and we can come together peacefully
in protest. Where would be without these critical rights that promote the
common good?
Thesis: The rights guaranteed to all Americans under the First Amendment are
rights we simply could not live without.
(can you pull out the subjects of my body paragraphs???)
Uno mas example-ito:
Hook:
If the drop is too short, death comes through gradual strangulation; if
too long, the jerk of the rope rips the head off. Too many precious
lives have been taken in cruel manners such as these.
Connecting Details:
Life is a gift, and truth cannot be disputed: history has shown that
America’s death penalty violates the 8th Amendment’s ban on cruel
and unusual punishment, that the application of the death penalty is
racist, and that innocent people are sometimes executed
(can you pull out the subjects of my body paragraphs?).
Thesis:
America’s death penalty should be abolished in favor of punishments
that don’t lend themselves to a system that is harshly unfair.
Thesis Statement
Has…
A subject and an
opinion
A Thesis Statement:
1.
2.
3.
4.
Must state your main argument (with subject
and opinion).
Must NOT be in the first person: “I think, I
feel, I know…”.
Is often stated in one complete sentence, but
can be several.
Generally appears toward the end or middle
end of your intro.
Are these thesis statements? Why or Why not?
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The 8th Amendment bans cruel and unusual
punishment for those convicted of crimes.

In Washington state students are not required to say
the pledge of allegiance, but they should be for the
common good* of all Americans.
*common good is underlined because it’s a democratic
ideal!!
In the following thesis statements, underline
the subject once, and the opinion twice
Corporal punishment is pure justice* and
should be allowed in school to improve
student behavior.
 The Electoral College is unjust* and should
be abolished in favor of popular vote.

*justice is a democratic ideal; unjust is just
another form of the word!
Thesis Statement

On the back of your Hooks/Leads paper (or in
available space in your packet) please write your first
draft of your thesis statement.

Start with “This paper will argue that…”
Gun control should be increased so that…
 Foreign-born citizens should be allowed to…
 The Electoral College should be abolished in favor of…
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Share…
Thesis Statement
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Now cross out “This paper will argue that…”
Now take a minute and try to include a democratic
ideal or constitutional principle (but you don’t need
to if its found elsewhere in your intro).
Share at your tables. Check for subject and opinion
and demo. Ideals/const. princ. Share with the
class…
Now I need a volunteer…

…to highlight the hook, 3 details/reasons, and
thesis in the intro paragraph on the next slide.
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Who??
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You also all need an eval sheet….they’ll
highlight stuff, then you’ll evaluate it!
Intro from paper titled “Freedom”
“It’s not just the books under fire now that worry me. It is the
books that will never be written. The books that will never be read.
All due to fear of censorship. As always, young readers will be the real
losers.” (Judy Blume) Judy Blume would be sad to know that more
than a book a day is banned from America’s public schools and
libraries. This denies the common good by preventing kids from
learning and reading what they choose. It is a basic human right to be
able to both express and receive ideas, but censorship prevents this
from happening. Books that some claim to be harmful to kids
actually provide an opportunity to teach some important lessons;
often lessons that parents don’t feel comfortable teaching themselves.
The First Amendment clearly provides for free expression, so books
should never be targeted for censorship. Book banning is blatant
censorship that hurts society, and should not be allowed under the
First Amendment’s freedom of expression clause.
Next, let’s look at more sample intro paragraphs
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You need a pencil and intro paragraphs
You also need a group
And some highlighters (3 colors per group)
As a group, read the paragraph aloud. Identify and
highlight each of the following in a different color:
Hook
 3 reasons why/details
 Thesis
 After you’ve done this for the first paragraph, use the
eval sheet provided to score it. Then go on to next…
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