Verbal and Nonverbal Messages

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VERBAL AND
NONVERBAL
MESSAGES
1
Rebekah Andrus and Kilie Keddington
P. 92-93
VERBAL MESSAGES
What the manager said.


Your performance was
below par last quarter. I
really expected more out of
you.
I’d like that report as soon
as you can get it to me.
What the manager meant.


You are going to have to
try harder, but I know you
can do it!
I need that report within a
week.
2
CLARITY AND AMBIGUITY


P. 93-94
Equivocal Terms- Those with two different, but
equally acceptable or common meanings also
known as misunderstandings.
Example: You agree to meet a
Co-worker at dinner. She is across the
Globe and she thinks dinner is around
2 where as here we think dinner is
Around 6 or 7. Miscommunication
Leads to frustration on both sides.
3
CLARITY
Low-level abstractions


Specific, and concrete
statements that refer
directly to objects or
events that can be
observed.
Statement

The job will take a
little longer
P. 94-95
High-level abstractions


Cover a broader range
of possible objects or
events without
describing them in
much detail.
Clarification

How much longer:
hours? Days? Weeks?
4
SLANG


P. 95
Slang is alright to use with friends and family,
but when you are trying to impress your boss or
clients try to stay away from slang language.
Examples





Dude
Bro
Sup
Sick
Dope (sweet)
5
JARGON
P. 95-96
Time saver
 A certain amount of jargon has its value for
outsiders as well. Speakers who sprinkle their
comments with jargon will appear more credible
to some listeners.
 Brief snappy or
roll off the tongue.

Examples:
LOL- Laugh out Loud
BFF-Best friends forever
TTYL- Talk to you later
6
AMBIGUOUS LANGUAGE
Brute Honest


This work isn’t good
enough.
I don’t want to work
with you.
P. 96-97
Strategic Ambiguity


I think the boss will
want us to back up
these predictions with
some figures
Right now I don’t see
any projects on the
horizon.
7
CHOOSE THE OPTIMAL DEGREE
P. 97-98
OF POWERFUL LANGUAGE.
Some types of language make a speaker sound
less powerful, while other types create an air of
power and confidence.
 Speakers who use more powerful speech are
rated as more competent, dynamic, and
attractive than speakers who sound powerless.

MORE
POWERFUL
Less
Powerful
This report is good!
This report is
good, Isn’t it?
8
BIASED LANGUAGE
P. 98-99
EMOTIONAL PROBLEMS ARISE WHEN SPEAKERS INTENTIONALLY
OR UNINTENTIONALLY USE BIASED LANGUAGE.
Biased Language

It’s a gamble.

She’s so wishy-washy
Listeners restatement
So you don’t think the
idea is a reasonable
risk. Is that it?
 You think Susan isn’t
willing to make a
decision?

9
TRIGGER WORDS
P.99
 Be
aware of your sensitivity towards others.
If they have a different view on things you
can offend them by saying some trigger
words.
NothingMeans
something
is wrong
Fine- means a woman
knows she’s right and
wants you to shush.
Wow- not a
compliment. She
is amazed that
you actually
thought it was
okay to say or do
a certain thing.
Go Ahead- It’s
like a dare.
They are
daring you to
go ahead and
do whatever
you are
thinking of
doing!
10
GENDER DIFFERENCES
Feminine
Rapport Talk
 Emotions
 Apologize
 Supportive


EXAMPLES
Did you hear about?
 Oh really?
 Is that right?

P. 99-103
Masculine






Report talk
Less emotions
Independence
Get things done
Advice to solution
Short and to the point

Examples
I’ll make reports for
Sara
 Fax these reports to
accounting.

11
NON VERBAL
COMMUNICATION

P. 103-105
Messages expressed by other than linguistic
means.









Appearance
Movements
Blushing
Avoiding eye contact
Shaking your head
Yawn
Laugh
Facial expressions
Distance
12

Hitch
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oqps_QfnOQ
13
p. 105
TYPES OF NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION
Voice
 Appearance
 The Face and Eyes
 Posture and Movement
 Personal Space and Distance
 Physical Environment
 Time

14
p. 105
VOICE
Social scientists use the term paralanguage to
describe a wide range of vocal characteristics, each
of which helps express an attitude:
Pitch (high-low)
 Resonance (resonant-thin)
 Range (spread-narrow)
 Tempo (rapid-slow)
 Articulation (precise-imprecise)
 Dysfluencies (um, er, etc.)
 Rhythm (smooth-jerky)
 Pauses (frequency and duration)*
 Volume (loud-soft)*

15
p. 106-107
APPEARANCE PAYS



People who look attractive
are considered to be
likeable and persuasive,
and they generally have
successful careers.
Beginning salaries
increase about $2,000 for
every point increase on a
5-point attractiveness
scale.
More attractive men (but
not more attractive
women) are given higher
starting salaries than less
handsome counterparts.
Attractive Factors
Potential employers,
customers, and co-workers
are usually impressed by
people who are:




Trim
Muscular
In good shape
Well dressed and groomed
16
p. 107
HOW SHOULD I DRESS?

Whether to dress up or down depends on several
factors, including the industry or field of work.
Most Liberal
California’s
outdoor gear
clothing
manufacturer
Patagonia, Inc.
Shoes are not
required
Most
Conservative
Most informal
Financial
Services and
Public
Administration
High-tech,
Utilities, and
Natural
Resources
Companies
17
p. 107
TIPS FOR CHOOSING A SMART WARDROBE
Look around. Look at key people in the industry
and country where you work.
 Be flexible. Within your company’s dress code,
choose an outfit that fits your daily activities.
 Don’t confuse “casual” with “sloppy.” A T-shirt
and grubby denims send a different message
than well-fitting khakis and a sharp shirt or
sweater.
 Never risk offending. Your definition of
appropriate attire may not match those of people
whose approval you need.*
 Dress for the job you want. It makes it easier for
people to visualize you in the position you want.

18
THE FACE AND EYES
A subordinate’s confused
expression indicates the
need to continue with an
explanation
A customer’s smile and
nodding signal the time
to close a sale
A colleague’s frown
indicates your request
has come at a bad time
p. 108
A
person’s
face
indicates
emotions
clearly.
19
EYES

One can control an interaction
by knowing when and where to
look to produce desired results.


p. 108-109
Since visual contact is an
invitation to speak, a speaker
who does not want to be
interrupted can avoid looking at
people until it is time to field
questions or get reactions
Eye contact:





Can indicate how involved a
person is in a situation.
Can be deceptive. People can lie
while looking you in the eye.
Can mislead intentionally or
unintentionally.*
Its meaning varies by culture.
In most conversations people
make eye contact 50-60 percent
of the time.
http://www.youtube.com/watc
h?v=qU3cAGHnPJU
20
p. 109-110
POSTURE AND MOVEMENT




Reflects attitude
Body relaxation/tension
indicates who has the power
in one-to-one relationships
Height—tallness usually
equates with dominance
Exaggerated gestures can be
misleading
Height—tallness usually
equates with dominance.
Posture reflects
attitude
21
p. 110
COMMON GESTURES AND THEIR POSSIBLE PERCEIVED MEANINGS
Gesture
In Moderate Form
When exaggerated
Forward lean
Friendly feelings
Hostile feelings
Direct eye contact
Friendly feelings
Hostile feelings
Unique dress and
hairstyle
Creativity
Rebelliousness
Upright posture
Expertise; selfconfidence
Uprightness; hostility
Variability in voice
pitch, rate and loudness
Lively mind
Nervousness; anxiety;
insecurity
Smiling
Friendliness; relaxed
and secure composure
Masking hostility;
submissiveness
Averting gaze
Shyness; modesty
Guilt; unreliability
Knitted brow
Involvement
Hostility
Nodding and reaching
out the hands while
talking
Self-confidence
Uncertainty
22
p. 110-112
PERSONAL SPACE AND DISTANCE
Intimate: physical
contact to 18 inches
Social-consultative:
4 to 12 feet
Casual-personal:
18 inches to 4 feet
Public:
12 feet and beyond
Get in
the
Zone—
Distance
zone
23
PHYSICAL ENVIRONMENT AFFECTS
COMMUNICATION




Space allocation—where is
the boss’s office?
Proximity affects who will
talk to whom.
Furniture arrangement and
seating choices can influence
others’ comfort and can
increase or decrease your
approachableness.
“Out of sight, out of mind.”
Proximity and visibility
encourage contact;
distance and closure
discourage it.
p. 111
How to create a
setting which
encourages informal
contact:



Make it centrally located so
that people must pass
through it on their way to
other places.
It should contain places to
sit or rest to be comfortable.
It should be large enough
that those gathered there
won’t interfere with others
passing through or working
nearby.*
24
p.113
CUBICLE ETIQUETTE
Privacy—treat others’ cubicles
as if they were private offices.
 Noise—don’t add to the noise of
the cube farm.
 Odors—your favorite scent may
be someone else’s allergen.
 Children—usually best kept
away from work except on
special occasions.
 Illness—if you wouldn’t want
someone in your state of health
coming to work, try to stay
away yourself.

25
ITS ABOUT TIME . . .



p. 112-115
Be particularly
scrupulous about your
use of time during the
first few months you are
on the job.
Recognize monochronic
cultures.
Recognize polychronic
cultures.
26
p. 116-117
IMPROVING NONVERBAL EFFECTIVENESS

Monitor your nonverbal behavior

Frequently ask yourself “how am I
doing?”
Demonstrate interest in others
 Be positive
 Observe conventions



Honor culture
Dress appropriately, according to
expectations
27
p. 116
DEMONSTRATE INTEREST IN OTHERS
Immediacy: verbal and nonverbal behaviors that
indicate closeness and liking.*
 High immediacy leads to greater career success.
 Immediacy cues are especially important when
making a first impression.
 Take the Nonverbal Immediacy Assessment

28
BEE POSITIVE
p. 117
“We catch feelings
from one another as
though they were some
kind of social virus.”
 You can “infect”
someone with your
mood in as little as 2
minutes.

Avoid becoming
contaminated with
the negative attitudes
of people around you.
29
p. 117
SEXUAL HARASSMENT

There are two types of sexual harassment:

Quid pro quo (Latin term meaning “this for that”)
Example: A direct or indirect threat not to promote someone who
won’t date you. Or implying that employment depends on the giving
of sexual favors.

Hostile work environment
This includes any verbal or nonverbal behavior that has the intention
or effect of interfering with someone’s work or creating an
environment that is intimidating, offensive, or hostile. Unwelcome
remarks (“babe,” “hunk”), humor, stares (“elevator eyes”), hand or
body signs, and invasions of physical space all can create a hostile
work environment.
30
AVOIDING SEXUAL HARASSMENT PROBLEMS
p. 118
Be especially sensitive in situations where others
might take offence at your words or behaviors.
 Read your company’s sexual harassment policy
and be very familiar with training and
information from your HR professionals.
 When in doubt, don’t do it!

31
p. 118-119
RESPONDING TO SEXUAL HARASSMENT
Targets of sexual harassment are entitled to
legal protection. But sometimes fighting sexual
harassment through legal channels can be more
burdensome than it is worth. Taking care of
harassment at the lowest, most informal level
may bring results that solve the problem
without creating further discomfort to the
target.
Response options:
 Consider dismissing the incident.
 Tell the harasser to stop
 Keep notes
 Write a personal letter to the harasser
 Ask a trusted third party to intervene
 Use company channels
 File legal complaint
32
Remember: Actions speak louder than words
Whatever language you speak, don’t
underestimate the importance of body language!
The Little Mermaid - "Body Language" in Foreign
Languages – YouTube
33
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