QUOTE
No birthday presents this year – Mrs. Callaghan (3)
DEEPER MEANING / EXPLANATION
Deliberate cruelty and injustice – the family are on
summer holiday, so they obviously have some
money, making their decision not to buy Isobel a
present particularly unnecessary and nasty.
Every year at this time she said this; every year Isobel has been mistreated for many years
Isobel chose not to believe it…experience told her
there would be no present – Isobel (3)
Whenever she found a new argument against Mrs. Callaghan derives a perverse pleasure in
birthday presents for Isobel, a strange look of relief making Isobel unhappy – Isobel refers to this very
would appear on her face… (4)
idea later on p. 35.
Last year, she had disgraced the family, that was Isobel has been made to feel as though her pleasure
true…[Isobel was] not allowed to go out in case she is shameful, and that anything she enjoys is ‘bad
disgraced the family again…(5)
behaviour’. This haunts her throughout her life, but
she finds new tolerance for the person she was on
p.166.
Her father said, sounding tired…her father was Mr. Callaghan is worn by his own experiences with
eating, paying no attention. (pp.6 and 12)
Mrs. Callaghan and no longer fights back. This is
who Isobel will become if she cannot find a way to
escape / rebel.
She was by nature timid, anxious only to know Isobel is desperate to do the right thing but has
what was required of her so as to keep out of been made to feel that no matter what she does, it
trouble, but she didn’t think she could do that. (6)
is not good enough (because Mrs. Callaghan keeps
changing what is acceptable). She longs for rules
again on p.41 and realises, eventually, that there
are no rules on p.172.
…that was a step towards the kind of person she This may be effective in childhood, but ultimately,
longed to be but did not have the words to describe Isobel’s decision to protect herself behind these
– someone sage behind a wall of her own building. walls isolates her from others – it is not them who
(6)
isolate her. In part, whether initially necessary or
not, she causes her own unhappiness.
The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes: A Case of It is ironic that the title of the first book that offers
Identity…’life is infinitely stranger than anything Isobel comfort is about identity, yet in reading,
which the mind of man could invent’…Birthdays, Isobel both finds and loses her own (‘the birthday’,
injustices, parents all vanished…What a lucky thing not her birthday or my birthday). In this book,
that she had found this new place in time to spend Isobel’s ‘strangeness’ is ‘normal’ and thus she feels
the birthday there. (7)
as though she belongs in the world of books – the
pleasure counteracts the pain of real life.
Caroline and Joanne Mansell would come asking This shows that there are people around Isobel
her to play with them, or Margaret would want her who want to include her in the social world, but she
to go for a swim…After tea she had to play Snap chooses to isolate herself from them. Margaret
with Margaret and the Mansell girls while she even lets Isobel keep the light on later one night
thought about Holmes and Watson and longed to (p.8), but Isobel, as she does throughout her life,
go to bed and read. (9)
does not acknowledge this support. Isobel is, to
some extent, responsible for her own suffering.
‘Besides,’ went on Miss Halwood, ‘it would be a Again, Miss Halwood is another advocate for Isobel.
shame to check her when she is so advanced. I only This also gives Isobel motivation to keep reading as
wish some of my pupils read so well…remarkable it not only offers her escape, but also praise.
advanced for her age.’ (12)
Isobel was living in two worlds. Miss Halwood’s,
where she belonged and things were solid and
predictable, and the other one, where she was
exulting
at
making
her
mother
uncomfortable…Meanwhile there was the world of
Sherlock Holmes, which was better than both of
them. (13)
‘I want you to go down to the shop and buy me a
small writing pad…You may keep the change
because it is your birthday.’
He handed her the kack-coloured insult…You
couldn’t make yourself safe, no matter how you
tried. They could always surprise you. She wanted
to hurl the coin into the water but she knew she
mustn’t express any feeling at all…As for the
repulsive half-penny, she wanted to do something
wicked and outrageous with it, but she lacked
knowledge of the suitable curse. (pp.13-14)
A harsh loud voice came out of her mouth, saying
‘Is that thing mine?’ (14)
It was a present for a real girl. (15)
She lifted it out of the box, set it on the lid and read
it like a book while she ate her lunch. (15)
There was a disturbance…all the grown-ups were
turning on her mother the same glare of
indignation, except Mr. Mansell, who was looking at
Isobel herself with a bright, soft look that puzzled
her, and her pale father, who was going steadily on
with his task of cutting, chewing and
swallowing…Isobel felt an ache of sympathy,
knowing how it felt to be the last chosen, or even
left out of the game. (16)
…retribution was coming, as her mother advanced
with set face and luminous glare and began to slap
her… ‘Don’t you dare cry. Ungrateful little
bitch…You little swine, thankless little swine, you
couldn’t say thank you, couldn’t even say thank
you.’ (16)
There was not much to cry about, for her mother’s
intentions were far more violent than her blows.
Her hands flapped weakly as if she was fighting
against a cage of air. (16)
This reinforces Isobel’s psychological motivation
for reading – she is praised and has self-esteem,
and it also allows her some power over her mother.
It is interesting that she only identifies as living in
two worlds when there are actually three (1.
Where she belongs 2. Reality 3. Books) and already,
her preference for books over reality is obvious.
This establishes a metaphor that extends
throughout the novel. It is ironic that her mother
destroys Isobel’s identity with the very object that
would define her – a writing pad. Isobel now
associates the writing pad (and everything it
offers) with vulnerability and suffering, rather than
potential and creativity. Rather than feeling valued
when finally receiving a present, the half-penny
represents Isobel’s self-worth and her mother’s
deliberate cruelty, and reinforces Isobel’s decision
to escape the pain of the real world by reading. The
writing pad metaphor is explored again on p.178.
Isobel appears ungrateful but her response
highlights the treatment she has received in the
past, thinking only to label the gift as a ‘thing’ that
does not belong to her.
This suggests that Isobel has not previously existed
– the gift has brought her to life (literary allusion to
Pinocchio?)
Isobel now ‘reads’ life, she does not experience it.
Isobel does not hate her mother, and at this point,
is able to feel some connection to her in that they
are both ‘different’. As readers, we can see that Mrs.
Callaghan obviously has her own demons, although
Isobel is not able to properly comprehend the
difference between her mother’s abusive behaviour
and the nurturing qualities of the other adults
(who’s looks of concern puzzle her). She does not
hate her mother but also does not understand the
extent of her abuse and the impact it will have on
her.
Obviously, Mrs. Callaghan’s abuse is awful and
demonstrates the physical assault to which Isobel
is subjected (not just verbal); however, the fact that
Isobel did not say thank you to Mr. Mansell is again
evidence that she is not able (or willing) to
acknowledge the support of those around her.
Her mother’s intentions are to make Isobel feel
worthless (‘swine’, ‘bitch’, ‘idiot’) and it shows both
the verbal and physical abuse Isobel endures. Her
blows are weak though, suggesting that her abuse
is in response to her own embarrassment.
…you bring disgrace on us wherever we go. Words Ironic as words actually define Isobel. This
are wasted on you, gawping there like an idiot.’ establishes Isobel’s lack of self-awareness,
(pp.16-17)
believing that perhaps her own words, as would be
used to be a writer, are insufficient and ‘wasted’.
This corresponds with the idea that anything she
finds pleasurable is shameful. In saying this, Mrs.
Callaghan has taken Isobel’s identity and make her
words / love of reading seem worthless, therefore,
the chapter is about more than a lack of birthday
present – that is not the worst thing that happens
to Isobel in her childhood.
‘Give me that, you don’t deserve to have it. Come Isobel realises that the brooch gives her some
on, give it to me.’ Why hadn’t she said them? Could power over her mother – she cannot take it,
it be that there were things her mother couldn’t do? because the other adults would know – and thus
(17)
finding ways to gain control over Mrs. Callaghan is
something for which Isobel constantly strives
(reading, brooch, grace etc.) It is therefore
confronting for Isobel when Mrs. Callaghan dies,
because it does not set her free as she assumed it
would.
It was hers now, all right. She went and looked at it This can be interpreted in two ways: 1. Isobel
in the glass and stood admiring it. In one way or triumphed over her mother and in a small way, she
another, she would be wearing it all her life. (17)
could wear this ‘badge of honour’ throughout her
life to remind her that power over Mrs. Callaghan
(and other obstacles in her life) is possible. 2.
Isobel is ‘scarred’ and cannot enjoy the pleasures in
her life because they are always connected to pain,
suffering and inadequacy.
Part Two: False Idols and a Fireball
QUOTE
…Fireball became another word for lie and the rosy
water was damned up forever behind a wall of
derisive laughter. In the days before she conquered
enthusiasm…[Isobel’s imagination] had become a
‘well known joke’. (18)
You don’t know whether you’re telling the truth or
not – Mrs. Callaghan (19)
It was well established that Isobel was a liar…she
would say no, though she had…Isobel did not
expect to be believed, but she felt that a lie was the
only contribution she could make to the
respectability of the occasion. (19)
Isobel hadn’t taken account of the number of times
she forgot her school money but the accusation did
not surprise her, for at home they had a wild beast
of poverty which broke loose now and then and
filled the air with screaming. (19)
DEEPER MEANING / EXPLANATION
Isobel’s natural creativity and imagination are not
celebrated but used as a tool to mock her. This is
another way in which her parents, particularly her
mother, stifle Isobel’s identity and is yet another
painful aspect of her childhood that haunts her.
Isobel’s creativity is again admonished – she is
made to believe she is a liar and a sinner.
Isobel is aware that she sometimes lies, but she
does so because she believes that is what people
expect her to do. She plays this role as it gives her
‘rules’ – she should lie because she is a liar. It helps
her to feel she is doing what she is supposed to.
This provides some insight into the lifestyle of the
Callaghan family – they are poor, and this explains
Mrs. Callaghan’s embarrassment when this is
discovered. She must ‘keep up appearances’ and
blames Isobel when the truth is uncovered.
Mrs. Callaghan spoke with ‘obvious affectation’. A pretend feeling, behaviour or speech that is
(20)
pretentious and designed to impress. This is how
Mrs. Callaghan feels she should react – she is not
authentic. This is ironic, given that she always
accuses Isobel of being a liar.
This time she had made such an earnest effort to Isobel is beginning to believe in this negative
reach the truth, and in vain, that she felt sure all at portrayal of herself; her inability to distinguish
once that the incident had not happened at all. She between her imagination and reality should be
accepted herself as a hopeless born liar… Her heart celebrated as creativity, but is used a tool of
began to thump with terror...Isobel was the only mockery and shame. This leads to her lack of selfone who told lies without knowing it. (20-21)
esteem.
She did have a lying sort of voice. Even when she This is Isobel’s perspective – does everybody take
was telling the truth it sank to a guilty whisper or her for a liar or is this simply her interpretation?
rose to a shriek of denial, which everybody took as This is evidence that Isobel is beginning to believe
proof of guilt. (21)
and embody Mrs. Callaghan’s negative portrayal of
her.
Bed was Isobel’s kingdom; it was always a comfort This again demonstrates Isobel’s psychological
to arrive there at last, and tonight particularly, she motivation for reading – it provides her comfort,
burrowed and snuggled and with a sigh of pleasure pleasure and escape. In this other world, she is
slid behind the curtain of the dark into her private queen, and is permitted to feel pleasure without
world. (22)
shame.
They’ve tricked themselves, making out that he’s an Isobel relates to Robert and Angelo – the family
idiot…That’s when you were in disguise, isn’t it, old have tricked themselves into believing Isobel is an
fellow? When you were living with them. (23)
idiot and so she wears this ‘disguise’ whilst living
with them. This is a problem later when she leaves
the family home and still cannot find connections.
…Confronted by a sobering thought: Robert and Isobel is aware that her books are fictional but will
Angelo were lies. It was all lies…She wasn’t going to not stop reading because they are the only thing
give it up, either. She was sure of that at once. that provides happiness / escape.
There was no living without the moments. (23)
(There must be moments when Antonia snuggles An interesting commentary on how Isobel views
up to Gerald, but those are too tedious to heterosexual relationships, probably influenced by
contemplate.) (24)
her parents’ fractured relationship, too.
They were lies but not ordinary lies about mission Isobel believes that she is going to go to Hell
money and chocolate and so on; there was because she is worshipping ‘false idols’ – Robert
something about them that was like the Virgin and Angelo have replaced her belief in Catholicism,
Mary and Baby Jesus. False idols. Not she was in although not to the degree that she lives guilt-free.
real trouble…Now that she came to think of it, she This is yet another burden that Isobel must bear:
never did talk to the Virgin Mary any more. Robert she is a sinner who is going to Hell because she
and Angelo had taken her place, which proved it; worships books. Again, Isobel’s pleasure is marred
they were false idols all right. That was mortal sin with suffering and confusion, which shows how
and her worst yet – a real hellfire affair, if she didn’t successfully her mother has influenced Isobel’s
give it up. (24-25)
own sense of identity.
But they were so lovely, her people, so kind and This is more psychological motivation for Isobel to
happy and dear. (25)
continue her reading / escaping.
…Now she had a new idea about sin and discovered Isobel knows she is a sinner but does not know
that the sum was not so simple…First of all, she had exactly what she has done that constitutes a sin.
to know exactly what the sin was…then add it to She says that once she discovers what it is, she will
the list she was memorizing – there was a moral need to remember not to do it, suggesting that
check in this…Still, she saw the deathbed Isobel is trying to ‘memorise’ a set of rules /
repentance as her particular way to salvation…(25)
Glaring into the dark, she indulged herself in hatred
of her mother, thinking of the hideous times when
she asked, ‘Do you love me?’ … Say, ‘Mummy, I love
you one whole shillingsworth’… And if I’m such a
born liar, thought Isobel, why does she believe me?
That spurt of malice brought relief, a dribble of
tears, and then sleep. (25-26)
…the new school turned out to be a safe place,
positively restful. [After returning back to her old
school] – Isobel was not reluctant to go; by this
time, she could rely on the scanty cover that time
provides…Nothing had changed…she still accepted
herself as a born liar, but she wanted to be a
knowing sinner, to know the difference between
truth and lies, and she hoped to find some clue in
the nun’s face, but Sister Ignatius didn’t seem to
notice at all, so that hope came to nothing. (27)
‘Isobel put it on and went out for a walk and lost it.’
‘What’s become of your diamond, May?’ and her
mother with a modest, worldy look was answering,
‘Ssh! My solicitor,’ following the words with a
strange, shamefaced smile. Whoever this solicitor
was, Isobel thought, he had the bracelet, too. (28)
She saw this and she didn’t believe it for a moment.
(28)
Margaret walked on in silence, frowning at the
ground. (28)
expected behaviours by which to live. She decides
to ‘gamble’ and repent her sins on her deathbed
(although she does not know her sin so lives in fear
of committing a mortal sin).
Isobel has come to the point where she believes
that she hates her mother, and recognizes Mrs.
Callaghan’s contradiction – she believes Isobel is a
liar, yet believes her when she says ‘Mummy, I love
you’. Despite her ‘hatred’, this thought makes Isobel
cry, suggesting that she does feel some sympathy
either for herself or for her mother.
IMPORTANT: Isobel understands that time
provides ‘scanty cover’ so people tend to forget
about things that happened in the past. This is what
she realises again in Part 5: time has allowed her to
forget the reasons why she built walls and read
books in the first place. This is also important
because Isobel is looking for an adult to guide her,
but nobody does so. She is thus forced to believe
that she can only rely upon herself, and no one else
– this belief follows her into adulthood.
Here we can see that Mrs. Callaghan is in fact the
liar and that she is selling precious valuables (such
as her diamond ring and Margaret’s bracelet) and
blaming Isobel for losing them. We never discover
who the solicitor is – an affair? Divorce
proceedings?
Isobel sees through her mother and understands
the truth: she is not a liar, her mother is.
Everyone knows Mrs. Callaghan is lying but no one
confronts her deceit thus no one advocates for
Isobel in this way.
Isobel did not speak. It was a moment for breathing Isobel realises here that she is not a liar, and her
quietly, in relief. Sister Ignatius would never haunt eyes have been opened to the behaviour and lies of
her again. She knew she had seen a fireball, too. She her mother. Once again, Isobel is made to believe
could never be mistaken about that. (28)
that she can trust herself and not rely on others to
define what is true. This is dangerous later, as
Isobel’s ‘truth’ creates the belief that no one likes
her and that she does not belong, which is
essentially not true at all. This is important,
however, as it is yet another belief that is founded
in childhood and extends into adulthood, making
her life more difficult than it needs to be.
Part Three: The Grace of God and the Hand-me Down
QUOTE
The grace of God descended on Isobel during late
Mass…she had a guilty feeling it had come to her by
DEEPER MEANING / EXPLANATION
mistake. (29)
‘Consider, my dear brethren, the sinful human soul.
It is not beautiful. There are thick cobwebs looped
in dirty corners, and scuttling insets which, only
half-heartedly, we try to drive out.’ (30) The priest
This talk of scuttling insects struck home to Isobel…
‘The one little window is so thick with grime we
hardly see the sky. But if the light of the Holy Spirit
should penetrate all at once into this cracked
cobwebbed cell, dear brethren, what a glorious
change!’ (30)
Mass was over and she was sorry, for now she had
to take her new treasure out into the uncertain
world…[she] considered how to preserve it. (30)
‘You should be proud of your daughters.’ Mrs.
Callaghan had walked home almost silent, crippled
by this injustice… ‘Oh, I could tell him a thing or
two. Street angel, home devil. That’s Miss Isobel.’
(30)
And looking at it another way, the harder it was [to
be good], the better. You would know then that you
deserved the light. (31)
‘It’s too hot for you to go round to Auntie Ann’s this
afternoon, Margaret. Isobel will have to go.’
…Dreamily, she chewed cold mutton and looked
with wonder at past rages.
… ‘ Saint Isobel of Plummer Street.’ (pp.31-32)
It was a new idea – that there was nothing her
other could do about that…After a moment, her
mother came to the same conclusion. (32)
‘There’s a jug of lemonade in the ice-chest. Get
yourself a glass of that but don’t go drinking it
when you’re hot.’ Such warnings were the common
coin of love to Auntie Ann…The Wide, Wide world
[was] open in front of her. (33)
Margaret looked so taken aback that Isobel began
to grin in triumph. In time she saw the danger:
quietly and without warning, the world nearly had
her. Her temptation was to be not the rage of defeat
but the smirk of victory, for practising humility she
had acquired power. (33)
Think of the inward light and hold on. (34)
‘…You nasty little beast. Miss Superior I can read
you like a book…you brazen little liar…’
But it doesn’t matter, as long as I’m telling the
truth. If she doesn’t believe me, that’s her affair.
This was so simple she wondered why she hadn’t
Links to pp.171-172 – Isobel remembers this
moment & it leads to her epiphany. Links to p.143 –
the cobwebs at Michael’s house (the ‘dirty corners’
of Isobel’s soul & Miss Havisham’s wedding cake.)
Links to ‘The Lady of Shalott’ who must also take a
risk in an attempt to improve her life. Isobel tries to
do this but it still does not work so she is reluctant
to try again – this is yet another aspect of her
childhood that influences her adult decisions.
Isobel wants ‘rules’ to live by so she can maintain
her state of grace.
Mrs. Callaghan is jealous and resentful of Isobel’s
intelligence. She reinforces the lie to Isobel that she
is a ‘home devil’ and that she is inherently sinful
and ‘bad’.
This is typical of her entire journey – she needs to
suffer so that she can feel deserving of the grace
and power she can have over her own life.
Her grace is tested and Isobel can now see that it is
easy to have power and control – she just has to
rise above and not give in or react to her mother’s
behaviour.
Isobel can control her responses and her mother
knows that, too, so in this way, Isobel can have
power over her own life.
Auntie Ann is yet another advocate for Isobel but
again, Isobel does not recognise her support.
Isobel’s hope for the future, due to her grace, is
symbolized by her choice of book.
Isobel is confronted by her reaction when grace
gives her power. She must be humble as that is
what grace actually is – she should not be superior
or smug about her triumphs.
Maintaining her grace is a conscious effort.
Irony that Mrs. Callaghan believes she can read
Isobel like a book.
Grace, her lack of reaction, gives her power and
control over her mother.
thought of it before…she knew she was telling the
truth. (34)
She doesn’t want me to tell her, she wants me to
scream. I do something for her when I scream.
Then she saw that her mother’s rage was a love
animal tormenting her, that she Isobel was an
outlet that gave some relief and she was torturing
her by withholding it. (35)
Her father used to do that, sitting silently while her
mother raged at him, chewing his food slowly,
turning the pages of his newspaper deliberately –
doing what Isobel was doing now.
But one night he had put the paper down with a
fierce thump and shown a white face, wild eyes and
a mouth gaping as if his tongue was swollen. His
chair had crashed over, he had picked up the knife
from the bread board and run at her mother…there
had been two little glittering points of satisfaction
in her mother’s eyes, two little sea monsters
swimming up from… (pp.35-36)
But I’m not doing it on purpose to torment her,
thought Isobel, so that’s all right. She didn’t care
about her mother’s suffering. Grace was selfish.
(36)
Grace was wearing thin for Isobel. She had to do
something quickly to affirm it. She shut her book,
got up and began to set the table. (37)
[Her mother was] darting looks of luminous hatred
at her – real hatred, no mistake about it. She
needed armour against them, but then, she had it,
not shining on the outside, but so long as she had
the light inside, she was safe. (38)
Shakespeare belonged to Isobel…Grace, grace. (38)
Margaret was speaking to her in an ordinary voice
as if she was a friend. Trusting her not to tell,
too…Things could change. That was the
breathtaking thought. (pp.38-39)
Thinking Shakespeare belonged to her – that was
an insect, all right. Shakespeare belonged to
everybody, like God. (39)
Margaret said sharply, ‘I couldn’t be expected to let
them down now. You said it would be all right. If it
wasn’t, you should have said so in the first place.’
Mrs. Callaghan looked as if she had walked into a
wall. She didn’t recover in time to answer. (40)
‘Who’d have children? Heartless and ungrateful.
Give up everything you’ve got for your children and
what do you get? Abuse. Speaking like that to a
widowed mother…’ (41)
This new knowledge and understanding again gives
Isobel power and control over her mother. It also
provides an insight into Mrs. Callaghan’s mental
health issues.
Note the past tense: ‘used’. Has her father already
died here? If so, the lack of acknowledgment of his
funeral / death is important. This also shows that
Isobel’s actions are deliberate, not authentic.
Her father was broken and this is potentially what
will happen to Isobel if she is not able to maintain
her state of grace / power over her mother.
Grace gives Isobel comfort, power and control – it
allows her to hope for a better future.
Grace is a conscious effort for Isobel. She wants /
needs ‘rules’ to help to maintain this state / control.
She is scared of losing her power and grace.
Isobel feels as though her mother truly hates her –
it is not imagined. She knows, at this point, that the
state of grace is her armour against her mother’s
abuse and as long as she can maintain it, she cannot
be hurt again.
Her state of grace is tested.
Again, Isobel is not really alone – there is potential
for real connection with Margaret, but this is
quickly forgotten.
Link made between books and religion. The ‘insect’
is Isobel’s thoughts.
Margaret is different to Isobel as she has the
strength to actually stand up to her mother.
Irony – she is the abuser. Also, here is the proof
that Mr. Callaghan has died, but there was no
mention of his death or funeral. Why? Consider
what this implies about his role in the family.
If only there were rules to keep, to be safe…So
began her study of the saints...Lives of the Saints,
The Oxford Dictionary of Saints…She found at once
that grace was every saint’s business, and they had
some very funny ways of keeping it. (41)
She didn’t want to be like them…They had the
world beaten, they were sure of themselves and
made short work of parents and even of children.
(How could Perpetua leave her baby? But she
could, and that gave Isobel a glimpse of a splendid
freedom in having no choice.) (42)
As for keeping the state of grace, there was one
message that came through, always: sacrifice. (42)
[Margaret’s] feelings were no longer to be read. She
had a new friend, Louise, and spent Saturdays at
her house; the alliance with her mother had gone
forever. (43)
Isobel was left to witness her mother’s sufferings,
which were real and ludicrous. (43)
‘Heartless ungrateful children…Selfish. You’re all
tarred with the same brush.’ (43)
She could not help it; grace told her to withdraw
and she did what grace demanded, though it was
more of a holding position now than an inner joy.
(43)
…Her mother was angry with fate, as usual.
Aunt Noelene was the manageress of a dress
factory and owned shares, had a car, took smart
holidays…(44)
‘If I’d been allowed to know how sick her
was…Perhaps you’ve forgotten a thing or two, too.
You haven’t always been an angel.’ (46)
Pinned to the skirt was a sheet of paper with
ISOBEL printed in large letters…Mrs. Callaghan
uttered a scream of anger, as if Aunt Noelene had
left her an insulting message. Isobel knew at once
what she had to do: give up, sacrifice. It was harder
than she had foreseen. (47)
The state of grace, the peace and security of it,
meant more than any dress. (47)
Her mother gave her a look of hate…till she heard
the dull snap of threads and tearing noise. (48)
‘Damn you, damn you, it was mine. It wasn’t yours
to tear.’ She saw the look of peace and relief on her
mother’s face as she walked away and she knew
what she had done. The old sick closeness was back
and she was the same old Isobel. (48)
‘It’s only a dress,’ said Isobel. She had lost more…It
Isobel wants rules so that she can be accepted in
society and by others (even though she already is).
She realises that there is no ‘right’ way for her to
maintain her grace.
Isobel both fears and admires the saints but what
she realises is that serving grace and the greater
good (or following rules) allows for no choice, and
this is what Isobel craves.
Isobel must sacrifice if she wants to maintain grace
– this is relevant later when she gives up the dress.
Isobel feels abandoned by Margaret, and that her
hopes for a relationship with her were futile. This
has an impact later in life, as she cannot connect
with her peers, despite them being open to it.
‘Left’ suggests that she feels alone. ‘Real and
ludicrous’ gives an insight into Mrs. Callaghan’s
mental health.
Another insult from Mrs. Callaghan.
Again, grace is now a conscious effort for Isobel,
rather than an authentic inner-joy. Even her gift
from God has been tested and ultimately ruined by
her mother.
Mrs. Callaghan resents her lot in life, especially
when compared to Aunt Yvonne and Aunt Noelene.
Aunt Noelene offers Isobel an alternative – a strong
and independent woman in a man’s world.
Implication – is Aunt Noelene making a comment
about Mrs. Callaghan’s fidelity or mental health?
Again, Aunt Noelene is supporting Isobel by gifting
the yellow dress to her – this gesture is largely
unrecognized by Isobel, who continues to believe
that she is entirely alone (despite Aunt Noelene’s
financial support and advice later in the novel).
Isobel prioritises grace and power over material
possessions – she knows she must sacrifice.
The dress is symbolic of Isobel’s grace and hope,
and Mrs. Callaghan is the one who destroys it.
Isobel reacts to her mother tearing the dress and
thus ‘loses’ the state of grace, and the power and
control she had over her mother.
Isobel has lost hope for the future, and the hope
was much more, and it was gone, and so was the
state of grace. (48)
that her life could somehow be better. Both girls at
this point in the novel are completely dejected and
unable to hope for happiness.
Part Four: Glassware and other Breakable Items
Isobel after her mother’s death, not fitting in, trying to be independent:
QUOTE
‘There was no hope of calling up any decent feeling
from her evil heart, which was rejoicing in the
prospect of freedom and even of new shoes’. (p.50)
‘Yet there was in her, deeper than her relief, a
paralyzing sorrow, not at her mother’s death but
being unable to grieve at it’ (p.50)
‘Perhaps the funeral would touch her feeling and
make her a member of the human race’ (p.50)
‘…her mother had become like other people at last.’
(p.51 – could make a link to p.167)
‘Margaret and Aunt Yvonne sat together on the
back seat of the taxi, as like mother and
daughter…Isobel sat beside the driver.’ (p.53)
‘Goodbye.’ It wasn’t a last word. It was a first word.’
(p.54)
‘She considers her indebtedness to Aunt Noelene….
You do too much for me. I don’t want to be a
burden.’
‘You can’t be expected to look after yourself at your
age. Who else is going to look out for you, for God’s
sake?’ (67-71)
‘Understand this. You will get nothing out of this
world unless you fight for it….Look, love, I don’t
think you’ll make it. You’re no fighter. They’ll tread
you into the ground.’ (pp.71-73)
‘Isobel had not known life was like this. She had
expected it to be simpler.’ (p.73)
‘People spoke poetry…Why did this fill her with
anguish, with longing and a sense of exile? Longing
for what? Exile from where?’ (pp.74-75)
‘She did not know what to say that would please,
she did not know how to please.’ (p.75)
‘Any rag will make a doll for the idiot in the
attic…Isobel had an idiot in the attic.’ (p.120)
‘Her body was a dog that answered to the orders of
others.’ (p.129)
‘You built a wall around yourself and too late you
found yourself walled in.’ (p.137)
DEEPER MEANING / EXPLANATION
Isobel feels as though she can finally be free now
that her mother has died, although she feels guilty
about feeling relieved.
Isobel feels guilty about her response to her
mother’s death – she feels relief (the same way
Diana feels when Nick dies).
Feels as though her response is inhuman – changes
later when she realises all human belong because
they are all mortal.
The ‘carriage’ – what unites the human race (even
Isobel!) is that everyone eventually dies.
Isobel still feels like an outsider.
Isobel believes that moving into the boarding house
will be the beginning of a new chapter in her life.
Aunt Noelene is one of Isobel’s biggest supporters
and advocates, but Isobel cannot acknowledge this
because she has built walls as a defence mechanism
against being hurt as she was in childhood.
Question – is Isobel a fighter? Aunt Noelene does
not think so, and perhaps at this point, Isobel does
not have the means to fight.
Life is not as freeing or as simple as Isobel thought
it would be after her mother’s death.
Isobel still feels as though she does not belong –
she feels as though she is in exile and is drifting but
does not know where from / where she belongs.
She is still looking for rules, but does not yet realise
that being authentic would be most fulfilling.
Isobel has a side of her that yearns for connection
but she labels this as an ‘idiot’ that needs to be
locked away.
Again, Isobel is looking to others to define her
behaviour and what is ‘right’ – she is not being
authentic.
Her defence mechanisms established in childhood
are no longer effective in adulthood.
‘You could change your name, have your face
altered, change your country and your language,
but in the end you would resurrect yourself.’
(p.146)
‘She shut the book and put it in the suitcase. Once is
never quite alone.’ (p.146)
Isobel feels as though there is nothing she can do to
escape her past – she wants to be someone
different but does not know how to be. She is trying
to reject / deny her authentic self.
Isobel is not ever alone because she has her books –
these are the only connections she has in life.
Isobel at the boarding house:
QUOTE
‘…her words were welcoming’ (p.54)
‘It was a commonplace little room but she was
prepared to love everything in it.’ (p.56)
‘She resisted temptation and went on with her
unpacking, having a modest ambition to meet life,
to be adequate. She had an idea of a life of her own,
like the room of her own, where she chose the
furniture…’ (p.56)
‘…she saw her face in the glass, so happy and
hopeful that the likeness to her mother, which
seemed to her usually to be a curse from birth,
seemed unimportant.’ (p.56)
‘…[she] thought of changing her name to Maeve:
Maeve Callaghan, poised, serene, quietly selfconfident.’ (p.57)
‘She didn’t, after all, say ‘Maeve’. They would know.
They would look at her with scorn and say, ‘No,
you’re not. You’re Isobel’.’ (p.57)
‘Was it dialogue? Were they acting in a play?’ (p.59)
‘Do you play cards? … She hoped nobody would ask
her to try.’ (p.59)
‘Isobel reflected that Betty hadn’t told her the most
important thing – how to be like her: cool, kind and
self-possessed, able to accept the peculiar Madge,
to deal easily with the boisterous young men…Still,
such a manner must be for all seasons. The seasons
of Maeve, who would study to attain it.’ (p.60)
‘No, it would not do to take Trollope down to the
dining room, not the first night.’ (p.60)
‘As soon as the excitement had passed, she was
ashamed that such a little notice should cause such
a flurry.’ (p.78)
‘She saw no sympathy anywhere, but surely she
was entitled to read, had seen to it that she
inconvenienced no-one. People who wanted her to
give up reading were asking too much without
offering anything in return. Right behaviour didn’t
work unless everyone practiced it….She was more
at home in the kitchen where she had to status of a
domestic pet.’ (p.79)
DEEPER MEANING / EXPLANATION
Isobel is initially welcomed to the boarding house.
Literary allusion – Virginia Woolf: A Room of One’s
Own. She has space to be herself (in theory).
Wants to sit and read but decides to unpack
because she wants to be adequate in life. Link again
to A Room of One’s Own.
Link to p.158 when Isobel has the epiphany that
her face is not only defined by her mother. She sees
her face as a curse – this changes later in part 5.
Again, Isobel is trying to reject her authentic self
and start again as someone new – as Maeve.
She is afraid that the fellow boarders will see her as
a fraud.
She cannot converse with others easily.
The boarders are welcoming and supportive – it is
Isobel who does not want to interact with them.
Isobel wants rules or guidance on how to be cool
and self-possessed, as these are all traits that she
feels she lacks. Again, she references Maeve,
believing that whilst Isobel may be lacking, Maeve
could be kind and able to accept others.
Isobel wants to read on the first night – she is
isolating herself from the boarders.
This is in response to Norman taunting her – ‘it’s
alive! It breathes!’ Isobel is pleased but this
demonstrates the distance she has created.
Isobel sees no sympathy, but is this actually
accurate? The fellow boarders, Mrs. Bowers and
Mrs. Prendergast were all very welcoming, yet she
was the one who created the distance from them
(due to the walls she built in childhood). All she
wants to do is read, and does not believe that
anyone has the right to ask her to stop.
‘This roused conflicted feeling: warmth and
gratitude – it was astonishing to be remembered –
but uneasiness, because she felt more return was
needed than she could give.’ (p.82)
‘Usually, Mrs. Prendergast’s plaintive but placid
tone removed her memories and forebodings out of
the range of human feeling; this time Isobel was
seized with such anguish for the unsuspecting
object in the baking dish that she wanted to run
away, did not know what she was doing in this
kitchen, which now seemed subterranean.’ (p.99)
‘You’re a clever little thing, aren’t you?’ (p.99)
‘She never disliked Madge more than when she was
doing the very thing Isobel would have done in her
place.’ (p.107)
‘The other boarders, except Mr. Watkin, who
moved like a small planet in his own atmosphere,
were hostile to her now.’ (p.109)
‘‘But oh, Joseph, why do they hate me? If it was just
the Eleventh Commandment I could bear it.’ The
Eleventh Commandment was Thou shalt not be
different.’ (p.110)
‘I wanted her to like me. This is when I worry, when
people dislike me and I don’t know why.’ (p.110)
Isobel looks to Mrs. Bowers as a mother-figure, but
feels inadequate as she cannot return the
compassion Mrs. Bowers has shown towards her.
This is Isobel’s response to the baby in the bakingdish. She does not understand her reaction simply
because she is not ready to confront the demons of
her past. Isobel feels anguish for the suffering baby
but is unwilling to explore the reason for her
response. All she wants to do is ‘run’ – compare the
perspective to p.175.
She is praised but is sits uncomfortably.
Isobel resents Madge and envies her ability to
stand up to her mother, as Isobel was unable to do
so herself.
Remember, this is Isobel’s perspective – are they
really hostile, or is she just interpreting it as being
so? They were welcoming so what has changed?
Isobel confides in the imaginary Joseph, knowing
that Joseph in ‘real-life’ could never be as good. She
believes that everyone hates her because she is
different. To what extent is this true?
Isobel’s coping mechanism as a child – to build
walls – is not working in adulthood yet she does
not have the skills to rectify the situation.
‘It was always like this. She had tried, been polite,
This is yet another example of when Isobel feels
passed the salt without being asked, would have
isolated as her time at the boarding house
liked Betty if that had been allowed. It had not been continues. She does not feel as though she was
allowed, and tonight the coolness was more
‘allowed’ to like the others, such as Betty, although
marked than usual, bringing the familiar stab of
it is she who established these ‘rules’ – in this way,
fear that she had done something to offend, sharper Isobel is at least in part responsible for her own
because of the hour of peaceful excitement and self- isolation and pain.
forgetfulness in Trevor’s room. self-forgetfulness
was always dangerous.’ (p.118)
‘Awed by Madge, Isobel thought, ‘If I could ever
Again, Isobel wishes she had been able to stand up
have done that…’ ‘ (p.119)
to Mr. Callaghan the way Madge has to Mrs. Bowers
‘You didn’t hate Madge for her methodical
Isobel can now see that she has taken Madge’s
mastication. You hated her because you took her
place as the ‘favourite child’ – probably because she
place.’ (p.119)
never was in her own household.
‘You left the house thinking of freedom, of being a
She realises that she was happy to be the ‘domestic
different person, seeing the world ahead of you, but pet’ because it made up, in some small way, for
you didn’t go on, you went back. To fight the old
what happened in her childhood. She understands,
fight and this time to win, to have to verdict set
however, that she ‘went back’ rather than moving
aside, to be the favoured child.’ (p.120)
forward with her life.
‘At least she knew where she was going wrong – no Isobel believes now that this is what has caused the
wonder the others disliked her, watching her suck
distance between her and the fellow boarders –
up to Mrs. Bowers, taking what ought to be
they could see that Isobel was trying to replace
Madge’s. Idiot wants a mother. Idiot can’t have one. Madge. This is painful because she just wants peace
Life is very difficult.’ (p.121)
from the past, but will not admit this to herself.
Isobel in the workplace:
QUOTE
‘At half past eight the next morning, Maeve
Callaghan stepped up the stairs, washed, combed
and neatly dressed, opened the door marked
Lingard Brothers Importers…’ (p.61)
‘Dejected and awed by this display of competence,
Isobel nodded and began with painful effort to
transfer Mr. Vorocic’s anxieties to the page. She felt
closer to Mr. Vorocic than to anyone nearby.’ (p.65)
‘This was just like school, therefore endurable, but
disappointing. She had hoped for an improvement.’
(p.65)
‘Sometimes she thought she carried an invisible
knife, wounding people without being aware of it.’
(p.66)
‘She had offended two bosses, humiliated herself at
the typewriter and failed in German. Olive’s look
gave her no comfort.’ (p.67)
DEEPER MEANING / EXPLANATION
Again, she wants to leave Isobel in the past and
move into the next phase – work – as Maeve,
believing that this will give her confidence.
Isobel is humiliated by her lack of typewriting
ability – she other women kindly show her, but she
views this as mockery. She relates to words on a
page rather than her workmates (‘I’m in
Czechoslovakia’).
Isobel is disappointed because her life has not
improved after leaving home – she still feels just as
isolated and confused as she did at school.
Isobel knows that she has the ability to hurt people
but does not always know how she does so.
Had she really? She interprets her first day as a
failure but this is not necessarily reality. She is so
used to being defeated that this has become her
automatic response.
‘She carried it [the German dictionary] as if it had
The German dictionary saves her from further
virtue, like a talisman stone.’ (p.68 – link to p.153)
‘humiliation’ – she often refers to books as talisman
‘I am not here, I am in Czechoslovakia.’ (p.68)
Is not present at work, escapes through reading.
‘Frank was a neat, cheerful little man who radiated Frank is a support for Isobel and is someone with
some of the virtue of the chance-found German
whom she feels comfortable. Again, she is unwilling
dictionary.’ (p.69)
to acknowledge this advocacy.
‘If you’re putting on an act, calm outside and boiling Frank’s advice to Isobel is to be authentic, but she
inside, that’s no good. It takes too much out of you.’ does not heed his words.
(p.76)
‘Finally, she too admired the ring, though it seemed Isobel is different to the other females as she does
an odd thing to do.’ (p.84)
not know how to respond to Rita’s engagement.
‘This was life: no sooner had you built yourself
Isobel started to feel as though she was making a
your little raft and felt secure than it came to pieces fresh start towards freedom (raft) but now feels as
under you and you were swimming again.’ (p.86)
though she is suffocating / drowning.
Frank is a Communist.’ (p.87)
He, like Isobel, is ‘different’.
‘Isobel felt deep astonishment at the words ‘nice
She does not know how to accept Frank’s
little face.’’ (p.88)
compliment because it is so foreign to her.
‘I want to be one of the crowd.’ (p.88)
This is her goal and her response to Frank’s
encouragement to be a writer. She wants to belong
but is unwilling to be vulnerable / authentic.
‘A had touched her arm. She looked up. Mr. Walter, Mr. Walter is very kind to Isobel when she receives
looking gentle, was nodding. ‘It’s all right.’ ‘ (p.136 – the news of Nick’s death.
link to p.164)
‘Who could have imagined such kindness in Mr.
She is surprised, showing that she does not
Walter?’ (p.137)
consider him an advocate.
‘Olive put her arms round her. ‘Oh, poor Isobel.’
Olive, too, is very kind and comforting to Isobel
False pretenses, but she put her head against
upon Nick’s death. Isobel goes through the motions
Olive’s body and felt the weight of sadness subside
a little.’ (p.137)
– ‘false pretenses’ – but it is not until later that she
realises the support she has had all along.
Isobel and the special crowd (refer to parts of speech handout for extra information):
QUOTE
‘The facile Lord Byron’ (p.90)
‘His air repose tormented Isobel, so that she
realized her anger came not from loyalty to Byron,
but from jealousy.’ (p.92)
‘Are you alone? Come and join us. Take a seat, do.
I’ll get your things.’ (p.94)
‘The question, if not hostile, was at least
challenging. She was not to be so easily accepted.’
(p.95)
‘Making them laugh might make her acceptable.’
(p.95)
‘How clever they were.’ (p.95)
‘She walked to the boarding house entranced, full of
wonder at hearing her own language spoken in a
foreign city. If she never saw them again, she would
know, still, that that was possible.’ (p.97)
‘Joseph…he had grown in her mind already: tall,
understanding, severe and loving. It would never
do to set eyes on the real one…’ (p.100)
‘She must entertain, she must be a success.’ (p.101)
‘Trevor saw the disturbance and took it to be
shame at ignorance being exposed…Isobel raised
her head, shocked by her rage and baffled by it,
too.’ (p.102)
‘She was really alive now.’ (p.104)
‘I thought I could make my life into a room and
choose what came into it. I was a bit above myself,
wasn’t I?’ (p.105)
‘The currents and undertows were mysterious evil
passions, rage and envy; most of all an
unconquerable sadness – no matter how willingly
they accepted her – at being somehow disqualified,
never to be truly one of them.’ (p.105)
‘How dreadful, to be a corpse before you died, with
the flies buzzing about you, buzzing ‘no selfrespect’, ‘what a bind’.’ (p.113)
‘Trevor was asking her to come into his bedroom.
She was locked in panic…She got up and followed
him, so nervous that she felt herself plodding
across the room and clung to the bannisters on her
way upstairs behind him.’ (p.115)
DEEPER MEANING / EXPLANATION
An insult – Isobel loves Byron and the special
crowd label him as being superficial.
Isobel is jealous of the easy way the university
students interact and speak aloud about literature.
The special crowd welcome Isobel to their group –
they are never anything but nice to her.
Isobel participates in the parts of speech game (see
handout). She labels herself a ‘preposition’ – a vital
component of a sentence and thus, society.
She is not being authentic; she is playing a part so
that she can be accepted.
She is in awe of the special crowd.
Isobel has renewed hope for the future; she feels as
though there may still be a place in which she
belongs.
Joseph becomes a figment of her imagination – she
still prefers to exist in the imaginary realm than
real-life.
Again, she is not being her authentic self.
Isobel is ‘exposed’ as being a fraud because she
does not know what Madge’s chant means. No one
makes her feel this way but herself – she
admonishes her own ignorance.
Suggests that she was not truly living beforehand.
Life has not been as easy as Isobel thought it would
be – she thought she could start again but now
realises that is an arrogant belief.
Even though the special crowd have been nothing
but welcoming and supportive, Isobel does not feel
as though she can ever truly belong. Why? It is her
own insecurity that makes her feel this way – this is
not reality.
Isobel openly judges Diana, but later realises that
both Diana and her mother were ‘corpses’ because
they refused to change.
Isobel does like Trevor and does not want to offend
him, yet she feels awkward when going to his
bedroom. This suggests she has not fully connected
with him or let down her walls.
‘What was the wrong way of reading, then? It was
always like this: whenever she acted without
thinking, she made herself ridiculous – but what a
burden, to have to think about everything…and
where were the rules? What did she have to go by?’
(p.116)
‘Stop looking for insult when there aren’t any.’
(p.117)
‘A naked soul was just as shameful as a naked
body.’ (p.125)
‘…if you had a life without change, it might be as
good as death, I suppose…well, when you can’t
change, I suppose you are as good as dead.’ (p.127)
‘Why did he make these off little remarks that made
her feel awkward with him?’ (p.128)
‘Selfish and heartless Isobel. I did feel for her. Once
or twice I felt for her very much.’ (p.129)
Isobel is made to feel that she reads the ‘wrong’
way simply because she reads for pleasure and not
to critique. This links back to her childhood, when
all her pleasures were correlated with sin. She is
looking for acceptance but is not willing to be
vulnerable, she will not take down her walls.
Typical behaviour of Isobel – she misinterprets
people and their ‘agendas’.
She is unwilling to be vulnerable / authentic. Link
to her nakedness later with Michael.
She is afraid that this will be her, but is relevant to
both Diana and Mrs. Callaghan.
Trevor is being social but because Isobel lacks
social etiquette, she interprets him as awkward.
Who is ‘her’? Is it Diana or is it Mrs. Callaghan?
Interesting that she has adopted her mother’s
language to describe herself – shows the impact.
‘There was a remoteness in his tone today that
She feels as though there is a distance between
made her uneasy. Had she done something wrong? herself and Trevor, and she does not know why.
How much she wanted not to offend Trevor.’
She fears offending people without knowing how
(p.132)
she does so.
‘ ‘Isobel’, and he put his arms around her. It was her This is evidence that people do like Isobel but that
body that fought, not she. It stiffened and struggled it is she who pushes them away (literally and
against being pushed out onto a tightrope from
figuratively). She is still not willing to let down her
which it must fall. Her hands went up and pushed
walls and be vulnerable with Trevor.
at his chest, pushing him away.’ (pp.133-134)
‘It was all gone in a second, the café, the books, the
She believes that after pushing Trevor away, she
conversation, and she had hurt Trevor, made him
has lost everything. Again, this is Isobel’s own
gasp with pain. Later, she thought wistfully of the
interpretation of the situation and the ‘rules
vanished prospect of being Trevor’s girlfriend, of
‘ she has given herself – no one else has made her
belonging…Couldn’t she have pretended? Would it feel this way. She years for meaningful connection;
have been enough, if she had done everything he
she admits she had wanted to be Trevor’s
wanted? That would have been no trouble, she
girlfriend, but does not know why she was unable
would have bee n quite ready always to do what
to allow it to happen. This is because she is
Trevor wanted. But she would have had to know
unwilling to let down her walls and be vulnerable,
what he did want. It would be like being a spy in a
simply because she is terrified of being hurt again,
foreign country, having to pass for a native. She
as she was in childhood. She decides to remove
would be found out. The penalty for being found
herself from the special crowd, because she is
out appeared as Diana, walking and watching,
afraid of becoming like Diana – obsessed with
obsessed with suffering. That moment when you
suffering and wondering why everyone ‘hated you
found out they hated you and you did not know
and you did not know why’. She decides to deprive
why – any deprivation was better than that.’
herself to spare herself the pain of rejection.
(p.134)
‘The feeling was appearing now: relief. Isobel was
Isobel tells Diana about Nick’s death and can see
the prison governor who had brought her news of
herself in Diana’s reaction – just as Isobel was
her reprieve…All right is no word for it. She’s glad
relieved when her mother died, Diana is relieved
he’s dead. She feels the way I felt when my mother
that Nick is dead. Both Diana and Isobel were
died. He wasn’t a human being to her, he was a
seeking acceptance and love from a source that was
thorn in her side, a stone in her shoe.’ (p.140)
incapable of providing it, and the death of Mrs.
‘Isobel went away. She did not belong with them,
though they had not shut her out.’ (p.145)
Callaghan and Nick should ultimately set them free.
Again, it is Isobel who is responsible for her own
isolation – she ‘went away’, they had not asked her
to do so.
Part Five: I for Isobel
QUOTE
Isobel woke up out of a blue and gold dream (147)
…A stain in one corner, yellow, like…sunshine?
Butter? Honey? Paler than pumpkin, darker than
pee…There are words. Words we have plenty of,
nasty little buzzing insects that they are. Awake
two minutes and the word factory is at it already.
And you at the loom, zoom zoom…It is stain
coloured and shut up. (147)
In the corer a clotted cobweb softer than dust. Like
Miss Havisham’s wedding cake. (148)
Told to bugger off and not come back…that was the
sentence she had been working on last night (148)
‘Who the hell do you think you are, sitting there
with that superior look on your face?’
Superior. If only they knew! (148)
Isobel knew what was tolerated in other people
was not forgiven in her. She very much wished to
know why this was so. (149)
Doctor, I have this problem. Some people count
lampposts, I describe them…a word picture of each,
to be handed in nowhere at the end of the day. 149
When they woke, you had to start guessing, how to
look, what to say, what they wanted you to be.
Always guessing wrong. There was the young man
who had said, ‘Why can’t you be yourself a little
more?’ That got right under your skin and it’s still
there like a splinter, because what’s to answer? I
am the vacuum Nature abhors. And not only
Nature, come to that. (149-150)
Not the head. Plenty going on in there, the word
factory spinning and spinning and what for?
Thoughts running like mice on a treadmill and a
door held straining against memories…(150)
Penguins, colour-cued to the young man’s interests,
drawing a map of his mind’s country, where she
wished, fleetingly, she could meet him. Not much
chance of that. (151)
DEEPER MEANING / EXPLANATION
Literary allusion: The Lady of Shalott.
Isobel resents her thoughts and the words in her
head – her creativity and imagination (consider
why – childhood?) Describing words as ‘nasty
insects’ means that the words in her head annoy
her and she cannot escape her thoughts – is she
therefore, a born writer? The loom is another link
to the Lady of Shalott.
Literary allusion: Great Expectations. Like
Havisham, rather than gaining any personal
revenge, she has only caused more pain. Could link
to the priest’s sermon on p.30.
Isobel remains an outsider. She is always inside her
head analysing rather than being present.
Isobel’s lack of communication and appropriate
social etiquette is often misinterpreted as
arrogance or superiority. Consider who is to blame
for this…Isobel?
Link to p.105. This is HER impression – she may
feel like an outsider but is she really? Do people
exclude Isobel or does she isolate herself?
Isobel views her word factory / her imagination
and creativity as futile and pointless – there is no
purpose in her thoughts, they only make her
different from her peers.
She does not know what ‘herself’ actually is – she
has no sense of identity or purpose. She is still
looking for rules to guide her into being accepted –
she is not the authentic version of herself because
she does not know what that would constitute. She
has the impression that everybody hates her, but
do they? There have been advocates and
supporters throughout her journey so why can she
not recognise them?
She sees no purpose in her thoughts. She is actively
avoiding her memories – her childhood, her
mother, the reasons why she is different etc.
Cannot connect, even intellectually, because she is
too unsure of herself.
‘You can’t tell me by my cover either, you see?’
(151)
More naked than ever, she plunged for cover in a
book. (151)
You do it because you can. Two ways to do it and
our Isobel would get it wrong. You like to join the
human race on the only level you can manage. 152)
…Stopped clocks. All my own work. Call it inertia.
(152)
It was the book. There was no doubt about it, the
calm she felt flowed into her from the solid little
faded book in her hand. She read the title, Words of
the Saints. Mysterious. A feeling of freedom, of
stepping out of chains. (152)
She put it down, panic threatened. She picked it up
and was calm. Amazing. I wave this wand. (153)
A safety fence. She was going to steal the
book…(154)
…for once the word factory was out of action, and
oh! The peace and quiet. (155)
Memory rose like vomit. Now you remember who
you are, Isobel. You’re a pervert, a phone freak.
(155)
[calling] had been a dirty private pleasure but the
best worst moment had been when the words
came, and she shuddered with satisfaction as she
let out the stream of hatred.
‘What an unhappy person you must be.’ She had
put the phone down, writhing in defeat and
humiliation.
That was the one that had stopped her with a real
answer; crying ‘I’m sorry, I’m sorry’, she had put
the phone down on that dirty little secret forever.
(156)
If a telephone box can make you sick to your
stomach, why shouldn’t a book make you feel
better? (156)
Once it was shut, the book was a talisman again.
…Looking in the glass and hating her face, as usual,
because she had got so much of it from her
mother…she was thinking those features weren’t
her mother’s; she had had the tenancy of them for
fifty years but they had been on the go for
generations…(158)
…The squalor of the room, the unwashed china and
the greasy frying pan on the table, the heap of dirty
clothes on the floor in the corner – a person
She is implying that there is more to her than meets
the eye – true, but does she even know what it is?
Books provide comfort and safety when she is
feeling vulnerable. Psychological motivation.
Isobel is desperately yearning for human
connection but cannot find it – this is why she
sleeps with men; she is searching for connection.
Link: Havisham & stopped clocks. Inertia: resistant
to change in its state of motion.
Again, books provide comfort when vulnerable. The
book connects to the state of grace / power she had
over her mother in childhood. Is this why it
provides comfort – it reminds her of grace? Grace
did give Isobel hope for a better future; remember,
Wide, wide world at Auntie Ann’s house.
Books have magical powers – they offer her escape,
safety and comfort. Talismans.
She likes the feeling and comfort the book offers –
it gives her protection from the world.
She does not like her thoughts – she is trying to
stifle her creativity, just as her mother did.
Insight into her emotional disturbance – this is
perhaps the only way Isobel can voice her anger
and hatred – abusing strangers on the phone.
Isobel was made to feel ashamed of her pleasure
when she was younger – reading, intelligence,
creativity, imagination, dancing, birthdays – and
now it seems that has become a self-fulfilling
prophecy as she feels pleasure in doing shameful
things. She regrets her behaviour, but only when
she receives an apology – perhaps Isobel is
projecting her hatred and anger at her mother and
she can move on only when she hears the apology
she feels she deserves.
Again, this references the power of books in
Isobel’s life.
IMPORTANT! Isobel comes to realise that there is
more to her than her mother, she no longer needs
to be defined by her. She understands that she can
have a brighter future, because like her ancestors,
she is nineteen and the world (‘she loved the
place’) will be what she makes of it.
Isobel’s room reflects her inner-self and her life – it
is a mess. She realises now that she has not been
happy, yet still blames herself (in part) because her
couldn’t make such a mess by accident, she must
have been trying to tell herself something. Silence
and solitude. Silence had started the word factory,
solitude had driven her to the evil telephone game.
Squalor within demanded squalor without…(159)
One works from the laundry bag inwards. (159)
She didn’t have to be solitary. (159)
loneliness had caused her self-hatred. She still
cannot see that the word factory is her identity, her
creative soul; instead, she rejects it as being a cause
of her suffering.
The worst thing…was the flap of wallpaper hanging
loose above the table. She had tried to glue it once;
the glue had failed and she had resigned herself to
it, though it nagged at her with the urge to seize it
and rip, making things worse. She could trim that
off and hide the patch, tack up a colour print from a
magazine – she was caught by a longing for
richness, for padded satin stitch glowing in crimson
and russet, a panel of embroidery. You could make
one…Well-known for her embroidery, our Isobel…
Miss Harman was far away, perhaps dead, and
Isobel could embroider flowers in any colour she
liked, pink, purple, whatever. This was known as
freedom. (160-161)
One thought she had been dodging – suppose it was
religion that gave the book its power?
This is a metaphor for Isobel’s life: she can see that
she is damaged and she is frustrated because she
has tried in the past to fix it, but it keeps coming
‘unstuck’ and more frustrating than ever. Rather
than ripping or cutting it off, Isobel will cover it
with beauty, the embroidery representing the
change she now feels she deserves. This is not easy,
though, as it brings back painful memories when
she was mocked for her embroidered flower – once
again representative of when Isobel’s creativity
was hampered in childhood by an uncaring adult.
She had had a religious craze once…it had been kid
stuff – God the imaginary friend…You couldn’t tell
Him everything, you had to be on your best
behaviour. Besides, she hadn’t liked Him. No, it
couldn’t be religion. The book meant friendship,
company at least. Communication and
understanding. (162)
Something stirred in the dead country. How did she
know so much about the saints? (163)
They were for Nick, for whom she hadn’t felt
entitled to grieve – but she was entitled; she was
one of them. She saw Helen and Trevor, holding
each other so tenderly, but Mr. Walter, too, and
Olive, moved to such kindness as they heard the
rumble of the cart. (164)
Mortality. That’s where love and brotherhood have
to start, in what we have in common: you belong
because you are mortal.
Look to your own awakening…She must go back to
the suburb she grew up in, retracing her steps to
see if she could find a memory, a clue to the
meaning of the book. (165)
Jesus Christ, everybody has the right to go to the
She starts to clean without and within. Change!
Finally, she sees that people have been there for
her.
Again, books – as they always have – provide Isobel
with comfort when she feels lonely and isolated.
She has blocked her experience with the grace of
God from her memory (consider why?) and admits
here that books and the characters within them
replaced her religion, as they seemed to offer her
more.
Isobel has blocked her childhood from her memory
– it is too painful so she allows time to provide
comfort; the ‘scanty cover of time’.
After reading through the book on the saints, Isobel
learns that she does belong in society, and she can
now recognise the kindness of those around her,
perhaps finally seeing that she has never truly been
alone, but unwilling to let down the walls. The cart
means death (see next quote).
Everyone is human so everyone belongs, even
Isobel. Mortality unites human beings.
Isobel wants to know why she relies on books –
why she needs them and who she is.
Isobel realises that the things that happened to her
lavatory; you don’t have to be a charmer for that.
She looked back at the waddling figure with a new
tolerance. (166)
The loose flap would still be visible of course – she
was amused at that, but it did not matter, since she
had discovered a small authentic piece of her lost
self. (166)
But how far? Two miles? Not very far to travel in
nineteen years…on her own, she hadn’t gotten far.
in her childhood were not her fault, and she begins
to forgive herself for the torment.
Her past will still be within Isobel, she cannot erase
it, but this no longer matters because she has hope
for her future; she is beginning to find her true self.
Isobel has not been able to be as free or
independent as she thought she would be – she
realises that she needs other people, a sense of self
is not enough.
In the cart carrying forward. Not strollers, she
The cart represents death, and sometimes, even
thought with horror, hearing remembered screams, children die. She wonders the point of loving
thinking what the price of human love might be.
someone when everybody dies but then
When she got into the bus, she was still thinking
understands that we all must live without fear,
with anxiety of the enchanting, perishable
otherwise, life would be too difficult. She can now
baby….This is serious; you are mortal but you must see that she does need to let her walls down and
live as if you were immortal – otherwise, who
connect with other people authentically as that
would dare? (167)
leads to a more fulfilling life.
She had to skulk about back streets, pretending she Isobel always felt guilt about not going to church
was going to ten o’clock, walking, walking, rapt in a when she was younger, and was terrified that he
mutter of thoughts she was too frightened to
mother would find out. She knows she is entitled to
express, like, I have a right to my beliefs, as much as her beliefs, but was always beholden to her
anybody else, but petrified all the time with the fear mother’s intimidation and mockery.
of being seen and reported to her mother. (168)
The pulpit was a surprise…The pulpit for some
She does not know why at this point, but can be
reason touched her feelings, giving out the same
linked to p.29 when the young priest gave the
friendly calm as the book. (169)
sermon that gave her the grace of God.
Why couldn’t you have gotten a couple wrong?
Isobel felt isolated because she was smarter than
Why did you have to set such a high standard for
her classmates. She was bullied for this but was left
the rest of them?
disappointed when a male classmate did not hit
her, but left her alone, because even though it was
Leaving her disappointed. She had not been so
frightening, she felt connected to someone.
close to anyone before. (171)
The mental arithmetic expert, the political animal,
Isobel can now look back and see that of all the
the survivor, was a little girl twelve-and-a-half
things she thought she was guilty she was only a
bricks high. (171)
child. She is learning to forgive herself.
All of the miserable self-images were invention, or
She feels like a fool because she had believed all of
at least embroidery. She hoped nobody would find the negative perspectives of her and in the process,
out what a fool she was. (171)
lost who she truly is.
She had received the Holy Ghost or something.
Isobel now remembers receiving the grace of God
Well, she had known from the beginning that it was as a child and her confusion about how to maintain
a mistake, meant for the woman next to her
it. She remembers that the state of grace gave her
probably…the joy [of grace] came first and you had power and comfort, referring to it as ‘tranquil
to guess how to keep it – there weren’t any rules.
weather’ and now understands that the book from
Michael’s house has ‘magic’ because it reminds her
Still, she looked back at a spell of tranquil weather, of the power she had in her childhood – it reminds
the calm that came when she touched the book. She her of the best version of herself.
didn’t remember reading that one, but she might
have, or the word Saints on the cover had been
enough to bring back the calm of the season. (172)
It was religion, after all. How sad. She felt in her bag
for the book, feeling nothing as she touched it but
melancholy…Of course [religion] made you happy;
that wasn’t the point. (172)
Run, Isobel, run! You put a lady’s name in the
paper, Isobel. She’s going to have you put in jail. We
can’t save you…Run, Isobel, run! Run and hide!
(173)
Isobel in her big quaking body felt like Alice after
she had been at the magic drink. Drink me. She
could do with a few of the cakes, right now. (173)
What rubbish it was…The ignorance of her parents,
and the years of misery it had caused her! Years of
terror: doing the messages, she had bolted past the
house in a frenzy of fear, getting past unseen,
usually, but when Mrs. Adams had seen her and
called her, how she had run, till her legs went to
jelly and her breath hurt her lungs. (174)
While she was reading a lot of things came back.
There’s a writer in there, Isobel; a naked infant
greased and trussed in the baking-dish with an
apple jammed in its mouth. (175)
I was so pleased, I bought you a book to paste your
poems in…I asked your mother to give it to you, but
she said it would encourage you to waste time
away from your school work.
No, they wouldn’t want a writer about the house. A
witness, a recorder. (176)
She had to get out, fast, because she was coming to
pieces, in great slabs, in chunks, like an iceberg
breaking up. (176)
Bastards, bastards, bastards. Cruel, deceitful
bastards. (177)
Then she roared aloud, ‘Spiteful, tormenting
bastards.’ Her father, too. She used to delude
herself that he father had loved her, seeing that he
had died too soon to disprove it, but it wasn’t so, he
had been just as bad, with his pompous talk about
libel and slander – libel and slander, for God’s sake,
the woman owned a cat. (177)
Her sobs were so loud that even in this wasteland
she had to put her hands over her mouth to muffle
them…(177)
I am a writer. I am a writer. Too late. It must be too
late. The poor little bugger in the baking dish;
nobody came in time. Suppose I tried? Suppose I
went through the motions? The writer might come
back. (177)
Isobel is disappointed that it was religion / grace
that gave her power and comfort as she had
expected that it would be something more
significant.
This is an example of the lies her parents told her
and another way in which they stifled her
creativity.
Literary allusion – she feels like she wants to shrink
away from Mrs. Adams, even as a young woman.
Isobel can now see that her parents are responsible
for her suffering. She looks back at how she would
run past Mrs. Adams’ house in fear, but can now see
that there was no reason for doing so. She
understands that her parents lied to her and she
believed them.
Link to p.98 – Mrs. Prendergast’s story. The baby in
the baking-dish is Isobel’s identity, but also her
creativity and intelligence that was stifled by her
parents. The ‘apple’ prevented her from speaking.
Mrs. Callaghan deliberately stifled Isobel’s
creativity by not giving her the book that Mrs.
Adams bought for her. Mrs. Adams was yet another
person who supported Isobel but was prevented
from doing so because of Isobel’s parents, who did
not want the truth about their family situation to be
revealed.
As soon as Isobel realises that her parents are
responsible for her suffering, she weakens. The
symbolism of the iceberg (more under the surface).
Isobel can now see her parents for who they are
and what they did to her.
It was not just Mrs. Callaghan, but Mr. Callaghan
who is also responsible for the lies and fear they
instilled in Isobel. She now sees her father’s
absenteeism as a lack of love, and he did participate
in the abuse with his ‘pompous talk about libel and
slander’ so he is not just apathetic.
Isobel’s epiphany allows her to release all the pain
and suffering she had been withholding – these are
her authentic feelings.
She can now see her identity is to be a writer, to be
creative and use the word factory to her advantage.
Initially, she feels stifled and that it is too late, but
decides she could try – a more positive outlook for
the future than she has ever had in the past.
The crying had slackened. There was such a feeling
of limbs stretching, of hands unbound, she knew
she could choose to be a writer. A pen and an
exercise book, that was all it took, to be a rotten
writer, anyhow. (178)
It meant giving in to the word factory…Maybe that
was what the word factory was all about, the poor
little bugger trying to get out of the baking dish.
(178)
This is the happiest moment of my life. (179)
The shopkeeper brought her the exercise book; she
groped for her purse and touched the book. That
was a moment, when she exchanged one talisman
for another. (179)
The Book is Gone (179)
The book must go, of course, back to Michael…She
was sad to think of parting with it, but she could
live without it. There were words to carry as
talismans. (180)
Christ, was that just a weekend? (180)
I met the ghosts of two murderers when I was out
for a walk, found the semi-strangled body of an
infant learning to talk…(181)
She smiled so happily that Rita said, ‘I do believe
our Isobel has met someone.’ (181)
O, yes, she thought joyfully. I met someone. (181)
Link to p.13 when the writing pad became a source
of pain and loss of self-worth.
The ‘poor little bugger in the baking dish’ is Isobel’s
identity but more specifically, it is her creativity
and authentic, intelligent self. The word factory
represents the traits of herself she tried to deny.
This is because she can finally have some peace and
freedom from her childhood – she can move on.
Books no longer hold the same power or value to
Isobel – just as books replaced religion, writing and
creativity have replaced books. She does not need
the safety or protection of books any longer.
Interesting that her first story is about no longer
needing a book – this reflects her life. This is both a
literal and figurative title.
She no longer needs books – she knows now why
she used / needed them, and now that she has
rediscovered her authentic self, she can carry her
words as protection rather than books.
Her epiphany was over a weekend, but really this
has been taking place over nineteen years – it has
been her entire life.
Her parents are the murderers as they ‘killed’ her
creativity and imagination; Isobel is learning to
‘talk’ – she is learning to express herself.
‘Our’ Isobel – this suggests that Rita and her
workmates had already accepted Isobel.
The pronoun ‘I’ – she met herself: I for Isobel.