Business Messages
Business Messages Are
Important When
A
permanent record is
required.
 Formality is necessary.
 A message is sensitive.
 An organized, wellconsidered
presentation is
necessary.
Hidden Negative Meanings
You are wrong . . . .
(I am right.)
You do not understand . . . .
(You are not very bright.)
Your delay . . . .
(You are at fault.)
You forgot to . . . .
(You are not only inefficient but also
stupid and careless.)
Use Bias-Free Language
Gender-Biased
female attorney
waitress
man hours
workman
Improved
attorney
server
working hours
worker
Biased
Each employee has his ID card.
Improved
Each employee has an ID card.
All employees have ID cards.
Use Courteous Language
Less Courteous
Everyone must return these forms by January 1.
More Courteous
Please return the forms by January 1.
Less Courteous
This is the second time I’ve had to write!
Why can’t you get my account straight?
More Courteous
Attached is my previous letter.
Please help me straighten out this account.
Use Simple, Familiar Language
Unfamiliar
We need to effectuate improvement of our
manuals to better elucidate our training goals.
Familiar
We need to improve our manuals to clarify
our training goals.
Unfamiliar
Sales reps generally conjecture when making
sales projections for homogeneous territories.
Familiar
Sales reps generally guess when projecting
sales in similar territories.
Routine
Messages
Persuasive
Messages
Direct Letters
and Goodwill
Messages
Bad News
Messages
Messages
Direct Letters
and Goodwill
Messages
1. Direct requests for
information and action
2. Direct claims
3. Direct responses to
information requests
4. Adjustment letters
5. Letters of
recommendation
6. Goodwill messages
Writing Plan for Direct
Claim
Opening
Body
Closing
 Describe clearly the desired
action.
Writing Plan for Direct Claim
Opening
Body
Closing
 Explain the nature of the claim.
 Tell why the claim is justified.
 Provide details regarding the
action requested.
Writing Plan for Direct Claim
Opening
Body
Closing
 End pleasantly with a goodwill
statement.
 Include end dating if appropriate.
Letters of Appreciation to
customers for their business,
hosts and hostesses for their hospitality,
colleagues for jobs well done, or
individuals who have performed favors
Letters of
Sympathy
to console a
friend, relative,
or loved one
Three
Types of
Goodwill
Messages
Congratulatory
Messages for
engagements,
marriages,
anniversaries,
births, promotions,
appointments,
awards, or any
significant event
Be
selfless.
Keep the
message
short.
Be
specific.
Tips for Writing
Goodwill
Messages
The Five Ss
Be
spontaneous.
Be
sincere.
Writing Thank-Yous
Cover three points in gift thank-yous.
 Identify
the gift.
 Tell why you appreciate it.
 Explain how you will use it.
Be sincere in sending thanks for a favor.
 Tell what the favor means to you.
 Avoid superlatives and gushiness.
 Maintain credibility with sincere, simple
statements.
Routine
Messages
 Explain the request
logically and
courteously.
 Ask other questions if
necessary
 Request a specific
action with an end
date, if appropriate.
 Show appreciation.
Improving Openers for
Routine Request Letters
Opening
Weak
I’ve been given the task of
locating a convention site
for my company’s
meeting. I’ve checked a
number of places, and
your hotel looks possible.
Body
Closing
Improved
Will you please answer
the following questions
regarding possible
accommodations at
the PC for a
conference in May.
Improving Closings for
Direct Request Letters
Opening
Weak
Thanks for any
information you
provide.
Body
Closing
Improved
We would appreciate
receiving answers to these
questions before April 4 so
that we will have plenty of
time to plan our conference.