THE INTRICATE PSYCH OF A CHILD
Pratik Shah
Apr 2 – 2013
Academic Paper #2
A child’s mind is a complex phenomenon. Progenies of today are considered to be
psychologically enhanced, shrewder in the use of technology, and possess high
attributes of logic. Character, confidence and security are virtues, which are focused
upon with the education of today’s day. However, what truly develops these
potentialities, spotlights the upbringing, education and environment of the infant.
What kind of upbringing develops these potentialities in children? Is there a
particular technique? The answer to this is sincere, as different parents have different
methods of raising their children, and tackling their psychological, emotional and
physical needs. Some parents do not have all the resources, possibly to provide their
children with the best of education, playthings, or have enough time to display
thorough emotion. The manner, in which a parent balances these deprivations, sets a
child’s personality, ethics, and self-security.
In the essay “The Psychological Principles of Infant Analysis” by Melanie Klein,
she quotes
“At a very early age children become acquainted with reality through
the deprivations which it imposes on them. They try to defend
themselves against it by repudiating it. The fundamental thing,
however, and the criterion of all later capacity for adaptation to reality,
is the degree in which they are able to tolerate the deprivations that
result from the Oedipus complex.”
This explains the fact that while children are growing up, they are familiarized with
deficits in their life, and often when they see these fulfilled in the lives of other
children, they try to deny the fact that it is not in their possession. Every child is
brought up more closely to one parent than the other, which results in more emotional
attachment to that parent, often leading to the Oedipus complex, which is the
obsession with one parent, which can lead to violent acts such as the hurting of the
parent of the opposite sex. The way the child deals with this frustration, or deprivation,
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sets his level of tolerance, reflecting sharply on his personality, and the ability to face
reality.
However, this nurture of a child and level of handling deprivations depends on
certain settings, which he has undergone. The mental-settlement of being self-secure
depends on various factors, for example the amount of bantering faced, or physical
appearance such as obesity, which has become on ongoing problem in the verve of
today, can initiate insecurity in the psychological structure of a child’s mind. Yet
again, it is the extent of abuse each child can take, which makes him different from
every other child, rather which makes him possess his own form of character.
Another chief issue related to infant psychology is whether children prefer activities
and subjects which have been intentionally imparted in an amount more than the other
ones. For example, in India the trend was to forcefully try to make children pursue
studies in Sciences, and the Commerce field was said to have lesser opportunities. For
some this worked, for some it made them perish and lot of children committed
suicides as the field of science wasn’t bearable for many. This backward ideology has
withdrawn by a great extent, as the people have realized that these views were not
appropriately correct. This proves that children often tend not to choose the substances
charted by a parent or both parents, yet sometimes children do tend to follow in the
same footsteps.
The environment around a child makes a difference in which a child optimizes
positions in living. According to the scholastic journal “Concerted Cultivation?
Parenting Values, Education and Class Diversity” by Sarah Irwin and Sharon Elley,
there are two ways in which children are raised. The authors represent the fact that
“The middle classes followed a logic of concerted cultivation, treating their children as
a developmental project, whilst in contrast working-class and poor families allowed an
‘accomplishment of natural growth’, in which there was much less parental
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Involvement in children’s daily life, recreation and talk.” What does this mean?
Children in upper-middle class families are treated with lots of care, and are often
“pampered” and “spoon-fed”, often tending to possess over-confident and overegoistic personalities, and lose fortitude instantly when they don’t have things steering
in their direction. The children raised via natural growth, are forced to live a life which
is not full of luxuries, and are accustomed to making their own decisions starting from
a young age, hence making them knowledgeable about the deprivations reality holds,
hence they tend to have a smoother balance in life when depraved times hit. They tend
to be more humble in nature, and are tolerant to harder functionalities of life, hence
develop the ability to cope with the hardships of vivacity in a positive fashion.
This of course, can be used in the cases of masses, but it is invalid to base the
analysis on this stereotype. The type of upbringing does count in the development of a
nursling, but the gender of a child does play an imperative role as well. In some
families, females are treated the same way the males are treated, hence confidence
levels are comparatively higher, and level of adaptability to fluctuating conditions is
more rigid. However in families, where girls are raised lopsidedly considered to boys,
for example where boys are raised to fulfill responsibilities and earn a living, girls are
raised to take care of families and be a supporting model, which is a common case in
many countries. Over here, when the girls grow up, they tend to lack self-confidence
and are dependent on their male counterparts for security and financial sustenance.
Nevertheless, the personality of a child comes from something entirely different.
Mostly, it is a dynamic, which is passed on from parent to child. Children are very
difficult to apprehend at young ages, hence parents act in different ways. Some parents
tend to show frustration quickly, some tend to bare the child with utmost patience,
some tend to use violence, while the others express their anger verbally, or through
punishments. All this affects the child in different ways, as some children may be
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violent in nature depending on the behavior of the parent, while other children would
never resort to vehemence. Ultimately it is the personality of the parent, which mirrors
the child, as the child grows up influenced by the behavior of his parent, and easily
follows the same footsteps of behavior and ethics.
Another growing characteristic in parent-child relations is the parent cognition,
which is the ability of the parent to handle responsibilities and difficulties of raising a
child. Parents are often unequipped to raise children, and have to make sacrifices to
support their children. This often shows on the child, as during cognitive development
of a child, his ability to understand or grasp things, is either steadfast or sluggish.
Hence with more emotion and preparedness, child upbringing is smoother and healthy
on the psychological makeup of a child. In some cases though, over preparedness and
worry can cause harm to parent-child relations.
In the scholastic journal “Parent Worry And The Relation To Child Anxiety” by
Brian Fisak, Jr. and Kristen Grace Holderfield, they have recited, “ It has been
hypothesized that parents of anxious children, and parents who are themselves
anxious, may be more likely to overestimate potential harm, danger, or threats to their
children. This bias may be transmitted from parent to child through behaviors such as
overprotection, modeling of anxiety, and reinforcement of anxiety.” This explains that
the anxiety normally is passed on from parent to child, depending on the amount of
anxiety displayed. The more worried and overprotective parents are, the more
rebellious and outgoing the children become, as the feeling of restriction comes into
place. Some amount of worry is normal in a parent-child relation, but when the
overprotectiveness and fear starts showing in the relationship, things often lose track,
and parents become overanxious and children become insensitive. The degree of
worry from a parent, will tends to show on the child in the future, as the child’s
personality suffers from similar types of cognitive behavior. Some parents have high
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expectations from their children too, which often puts a lot of pressure on the child,
which is unhealthy at such a young age. Children should be sustained to a certain
amount of pressure, and expectations of high sorts should be lifted, as every child is
different, physically and psychologically.
Cognition and anxiety develop in some children speedily, and in some gradually,
but ultimately, what is the most significant element in the upbringing of a child?
Character, personality, confidence and ethics do play a principal role in the overall
development of a child, but all this is incomplete without one element; happiness.
Whether a child has been raised as poor or rich, old money or new money, physically
punished or verbally, it all comes down to the contentment of a child while growing
up. If a child is not content, probably because of deprivations in his life, he can sink
into depression, or may become a loner, or just a “troubled teenager”. The method in
which a child is brought up has to look upon how the child has been satisfied, as it the
most important feature for a child to progress with. Being content leads to being
happy, being happy leads to being confident, being confident ensures self-security, and
self-security firms up the personality of that child.
The psychology of a child is still a mystery to many, as it is so complex, so vast and
intricate. Children are simple beings, with convoluted minds, unassuming demands,
and composite behaviors. If not brought up in the right manner, things can go
incredibly wrong, as they can be pushed down the wrong path. Children should be
guaranteed that they are secure, and poise should soar in them. The main priority of a
parent is to ensure that their child is blissful, as it is only this happiness, which results
in a brighter future, with a stronger character.
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BIBLOGRAPHY

JACOBUS, LEE A. (A WORLD OF IDEAS)

KLEIN, MELANIE (THE PSYCHOLOGICAL PRINCIPLES OF
INFANT ANALYSIS)

WEB.EBSCOHOST.COM

FISAK,JR. BRIAN; HOLDEERFIELD GRACE, KRISTEN (PARENT
WORRY AND THE RELATION TO CHILD ANXIETY)

IRWIN, SARAH; ELLEY, SHARON (CONCERTED CULTIVATION?)
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