St Mary’s Portchester
Full forename (s):
Surname:
Age on wedding day (years only)
Date of Birth:
Nationality:
Address including postcode:
Telephone number (please provide home / work / mobile as applicable)
Email address (useful):
Future address if different from above (& moving in date):
Have you been married before?
If yes, was the marriage terminated by death or divorce?
Are you related or connected by marriage, if so how?
Occupation / Rank
Which is your local parish church?
(Please contact church office if in doubt)
Do you have a particular connection with St Mary’s? If so, what?
Father's full name:
Is your father living or deceased?
Occupation of father (even if deceased or retired):
Signature and date:
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St Mary’s Portchester
Application For Marriage
Proposed date and time of wedding:
For office use:
Appointment with Minister made (tick when complete) Date:
Wedding date booked:
Office Diary
Diary of officiating minister
Letter of confirmation sent
Deposit paid
(Cheque no)
Wedding details returned
Order of Service:
Out sourced
St Mary’s to prepare
Type of Service Card:
Optional extras requested (give details below):
Rehearsal Date Booked
Date
Book Fold / Tri Fold
Reading of the Banns :
Groom’s Parish Church Dates:
Bride’s Parish Church Dates:
St Mary’s Dates:
Banns Certificate received
Flowers:
Date/time of Access Required:
(St Mary’s does not provide a flower arranging service)
Contact name and telephone number for person/company undertaking arrangements:
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St Mary’s Portchester
We are delighted that you are considering marriage at St Mary’s. This booklet has been prepared to help you through the practicalities and legalities of your church wedding, and to answer some common questions. There will naturally be further details that you will wish to talk through with the vicar (or officiating minister) as your wedding day draws closer. St Mary’s also has a parish office which is open on weekday mornings—contact details are on the back cover.
For some people, having a ‘church wedding’ is something they have dreamed of since they were young. For others, it is the norm or the proper thing to do. For Christians, however, choosing a church as a place to launch a marriage is primarily about faith. There is the faith that bridegroom and bride have in each other as they commit to a new stage of life together. And there is faith in God, who Christians believe can be the best guide and support through all the joys and difficulties that lie ahead.
We recognise that couples marrying in church come from different backgrounds of belief. Yet (as you will notice) the Church of England marriage service is very deliberate in its Christian celebration of faith. This is the first thing to say, therefore: please don’t lose sight, amidst all the practical arrangements, of the genuine wonder of marriage. If your church wedding awakens an interest in the spiritual side of the life you are living, don’t ignore this—the vicar or another member of the church will happily talk to you further.
 Most couples will be getting married following a legal process known as Calling of Banns. If this is the case for you, your banns will be called at St Mary’s during the 10.30am service on the first three
Sundays of the month prior to your wedding. Most couples like to come to church to hear their banns read, and we encourage you to do this.
 If either of you live outside the parish of St Mary’s, you must arrange with the Vicar of that parish to have your banns called there in addition to where you are being married. You must produce a certificate from the Vicar of your home parish to certify that this has been done.
 Should you both live in another parish and you are joining the Electoral Roll in order to get married here you must :
(a) come to Church regularly, at least twice a month for a 6-month period to qualify for membership.
(b) have your banns read in the parish or parishes where each of you reside.
If either of you is divorced, the vicar will want to talk to you further about this. The break-up of a previous marriage is not in every case an impediment to your marrying again, but an open and honest conversation at an early stage is the best approach.
Only your official photographer may take photographs, and may take them at any part of the service and from any angle. Most professional photographers know how to be discreet and unobtrusive!!
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If you wish to have a video taken of your service, then the camera operator must have or obtain a proper license for this. We suggest that equipment is set up in the side chapel, as this gives the best view of the bride and groom at all points during the ceremony.
The signing takes place during the service. Both husband and wife sign with their full names (the bride using her maiden name). You must nominate two witnesses over the age of 18 years to sign the registers.
It is helpful to let them know well in advance of the service that they are being asked to do this.
If you are arranging flowers yourselves or are hiring a florist, access to the church before the wedding should be arranged with the church office. St Mary’s does undertake flower arranging or can provide other materials (such as vases or oasis).
Only bio-degradable confetti may be used and should only be thrown in church grounds and around the
Lych Gate, but not in the castle grounds.
The car park outside the Castle will hold about 20 cars. Only the bridal cars may go into the Castle grounds.
We suggest you inform guests that parking is restricted in the car park for the elderly or disabled. Parking is also available in the larger car park.
Wedding fees are set nationally by the Church Commissioners each year. There are also permitted local additions for organist and verger and additional charges for church cleaning/heating and/or video. See attached sheet for full details of current fees. These will need to be paid into the office, at least one week prior to your wedding. Please make cheques payable to ‘St Mary’.
You will need to decide on:

Entry and exit music - the most popular being the Bridal March “Lohengrin” by Wagner and the
Wedding March by Mendelssohn.

Hymns - often two or three hymns are sung at weddings. You may choose any suitable Christian hymn that you like. Included in this pack is a selection of popular hymns used at weddings. Our organist, David Cain, would be happy to talk to you after any Sunday Service about your choice of music.

Readings - a marriage service has at least one reading from the Bible. You can choose this or you can ask for suggestions from the minister taking the service. You may also wish to have other readings, for instance a poem.
Readings can be a good opportunity for a family member or close friend to play a part in the service.

Whether there is any variation in the vows you wish to take (eg whether the bride will vow “to love, cherish and obey” the bridegroom, compared to the usual “to love and to cherish”).
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
Whether you would like mention of anyone or anything during the prayers (eg for family members who are unwell or unable to attend). You may have a family member or friend who you would like to lead the prayers.
We can provide various orders of service for your wedding (prices available on request). Please discuss with the Church Administrator.
If you want to make the service more personal by adding items, or involving family or friends in the service, please talk to the minister well in advance. Family members or friends who are ordained ministers are particularly welcome to help.
Your rehearsal will normally take place within the 7 days prior to your wedding - but please confirm this with the minister. It is often helpful if the person giving the bride away and the best man are present at the rehearsal. You may wish to invite bridesmaids and other close family, but not too many please!
We are able to provide a choir or bells for your wedding.
NB: Payment to be made at least two weeks before the day of your wedding. Cheques payable to St Mary’s
PCC. These fees are correct at the time of going to press and the church reserves the right to increase/amend as necessary.
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St Mary’s Portchester
(sometimes printed for guests to read before the service)
A wedding is one of life's great moments, a time of solemn commitment as well as good wishes, feasting and joy. St John tells us how Jesus shared in such an occasion at Cana, and gave there a sign of new beginnings as he turned water into wine.
Marriage is intended by God to be a creative relationship, as his blessing enables husband and wife to love and support each other in good times and in bad, and to share in the care and upbringing of children. For
Christians, marriage is also an invitation to share life together in the spirit of Jesus Christ. It is based upon a solemn, public and life-long covenant between a man and a woman, declared and celebrated in the presence of God and before witnesses. On this their wedding day the bride and bridegroom face each other, make their promises and receive God's blessing. You are witnesses of the marriage, and express your support by your presence and your prayers. Your support does not end today: the couple will value continued encouragement in the days and years ahead of them.
Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth.
It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
(1 Corinthians 13.4-7)
Copyright acknowledgment (where not already indicated):
The bride and groom stand before the priest.
The Welcome
God is love, and those who live in love live in God and God lives in them.
1 John 4.16
Prayer
God of wonder and of joy: grace comes from you, and you alone are the source of life and love.
Without you, we cannot please you; without your love, our deeds are worth nothing.
Send your Holy Spirit, and pour into our hearts that most excellent gift of love, that we may worship you now with thankful hearts and serve you always with willing minds; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
Hymn
Bride and groom stand before the minister, and the minister says:
In the presence of God, we have come together to witness the marriage of N and N, to pray for God’s blessing on them, to share their joy and to celebrate their love.
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Marriage is a gift of God in creation through which husband and wife may know the grace of God. It is given that as man and woman grow together in love and trust, they shall be united with one another in heart, body and mind, as Christ is united with his bride, the Church.
The gift of marriage brings husband and wife together in the delight and tenderness of sexual union and joyful commitment to the end of their lives. It is given as the foundation of family life in which children are born and nurtured and in which each member of the family, in good times and in bad, may find strength, companionship and comfort, and grow to maturity in love.
Marriage is a way of life made holy by God, and blessed by the presence of our Lord Jesus Christ with those celebrating a wedding at Cana in Galilee. Marriage is a sign of unity and loyalty which all should uphold and honour. It enriches society and strengthens community. No one should enter into it lightly or selfishly but reverently and responsibly in the sight of almighty God.
N and N are now to enter this way of life. They will each give their consent to the other and make solemn vows, and in token of this they will each give and receive a ring. We pray with them that the Holy Spirit will guide and strengthen them, that they may fulfil God’s purposes for the whole of their earthly life together.
The Declarations
The minister says to the congregation
First, I am required to ask anyone present who knows a reason why these persons may not lawfully marry, to declare it now.
The minister says to the couple
The vows you are about to take are to be made in the presence of God, who is judge of all and knows all the secrets of our hearts; therefore if either of you knows a reason why you may not lawfully marry, you must declare it now.
The minister says to the bridegroom
N, will you take N to be your wife?
Will you love her, comfort her, honour and protect her, and, forsaking all others, be faithful to her as long as you both shall live?
He answers
I will.
The minister says to the bride
N, will you take N to be your husband?
Will you love him, comfort him, honour and protect him, and, forsaking all others, be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?
She answers
I will.
The minister says to the congregation
Will you, the families and friends of N and N, support and uphold them in their marriage now and in the years to come?
All We will.
The couple stand before the minister
The Giving of the Bride (optional)
The priest says
Who gives this woman to be married to this man?
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The Vows
The minister introduces the vows:
N and N, I now invite you to join hands and make your vows, in the presence of God and his people.
The bride and bridegroom face each other.
The bridegroom takes the bride’s right hand in his, and says
I, N, take you, N, to be my wife, to have and to hold from this day forward; for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, (or to love, cherish and obey) till death us do part; according to God’s holy law.
In the presence of God I make this vow.
They loose hands.
The bride takes the bridegroom’s right hand in hers, and says
I, N, take you, N, to be my husband, to have and to hold from this day forward; for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, (or to love, cherish and obey) till death us do part; according to God’s holy law.
In the presence of God I make this vow.
They loose hands
The Giving of the Rings
The minister receives the rings, and says
Heavenly Father, by your blessing, let these rings be to N and N a symbol of unending love and faithfulness, to remind them of the vow and covenant which they have made this day through Jesus Christ our Lord.
All Amen
The bridegroom places the ring on the fourth finger of the bride’s left hand and, holding it there says:
N, I give you this ring as a sign of our marriage.
With my body I honour you, all that I am I give to you, and all that I have I share with you, within the love of God,
Father, Son and Holy Spirit.
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They loose hands and the bride places a ring on the fourth finger of the Bridegroom’s left hand and, holding it there says:
N, I give you this ring
As a sign of our marriage .
With my body I honour you,
All that I am I give to you,
And all that I have I share with you,
Within the love of God,
Father, Son and Holy Spirit
The Proclamation
The minister addresses the people
In the presence of God, and before this congregation, N and N have given their consent and made their marriage vows to each other. They have declared their marriage by the joining of hands and by the giving and receiving of rings.
I therefore proclaim that they are husband and wife.
The minister joins their right hands together and says
Those whom God has joined together let no one put asunder.
The Blessing of the Marriage
The husband and wife kneel
Blessed are you, O Lord our God, for you have created joy and gladness, pleasure and delight, love, peace and fellowship.
Pour out the abundance of your blessing upon N and N in their new life together.
Let their love for each other be a seal upon their hearts, and a crown upon their heads.
Bless them in their work and in their companionship; awake and asleep, in joy and in sorrow, in life and in death.
Finally, in your mercy, bring them to that banquet where your saints feast for ever in your heavenly home.
We ask this through Jesus Christ your Son, our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever.
All Amen.
The minister says to the couple
God the Father,
God the Son,
God the Holy Spirit, bless, preserve and keep you; the Lord mercifully grant you the riches of his grace, that you may please him both in body and soul, and, living together in faith and love, may receive the blessings of eternal life.
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All Amen.
Hymn
Reading(s)
The Address
Registration of the Marriage
Prayers
The prayers conclude with the Lord’s Prayer.
Hymn
The Dismissal
The minister says
God the Holy Trinity make you strong in faith and love, defend you on every side, and guide you in truth and peace; and the blessing of God almighty, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, be among you and remain with you always.
All Amen
A wide range of Bible readings can be chosen for a wedding service. Popular passages concern love, commitment and the best foundations for living. Some deal more specifically with the love of God and the example Jesus gave us. Below are a number of readings that are suitable for weddings.
The attention of the recordist is drawn to the following matters:
1. The law of copyright is complex. It is most important that it is recognised that neither the incumbent
(the vicar), nor the Parochial Church Council has any authority to give copyright permission for the lawful reproduction or recording of any work, literary or musical which is protected by copyright.
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St Mary’s Portchester
2. Certain blanket arrangements have been made to facilitate the recording in church of the texts of the marriage and baptism services. Without prior application having to be made to the copyright owners, copyright permission, subject to the conditions in paragraph 3, has been given for the recording on either videotape or audiotape of the following material:
Solemnisation of Matrimony from the Book of Common Prayer
Initiation & Marriage Services (Common Worship)
Solemnization of Matrimony First Series
Baptism of Infants from the Book of Common Prayer
The Psalter in the Book of Common Prayer
The Revised Psalter
The Liturgical Psalter
3. The conditions on which a tape of the material specified in paragraph 1 may be made without prior application are as follows:
(a) No rights in the recording and no copies of it shall be transferred or assigned in consideration of money or money’s worth i.e. the rights in the recording and copies shall not be sold commercially except that the original recording and copies may be sold to the couple who commissioned the recording.
(b) No more than three copies of the recording shall be made.
(c) The recording, including an extract from it, shall not be exhibited in public.
4. The copyright owners of the material listed in paragraph 2 charge no fee for this permission.
5. These blanket arrangements and the permissions relating to the material specified in paragraph 2 do not extend to any part of the service other than the text of the authorised service and psalms from the three
Psalters. Thus hymns, anthems, additional prayers etc., are not covered by these permissions and it is your responsibility to obtain permission for such other copyright material which is included in the service.
Copyright subsists in a work at least until the end of the period of 50 years from the end of the calendar year in which the originator (author, composer, etc.) died. Where there is doubt whether material is copyright, the publisher will usually be able to assist.
So far as copyright music and lyrics are concerned, detailed advice of aspects of copyright is available from the Mechanical Copyright Protection Society Ltd, 41 Streatham High Road, London SW16 1ER (tel: 020
8769 4400).
This notice is issued by the incumbent to give permission for recording equipment to be brought into and used inside the church for the purposes of recording the above service subject to the following conditions:
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