HOW TO RESOLVE CONFLICTS IN MARRIAGE
TEXT: MATT. 19:7-9.
INTRODUCTION: Marriage is designed to help you avoid the most common mistakes made
during and after the honeymoon.
The way you make decision right after marriage will either set you on a course toward
compatibility and mutual love or on a course that leads to disaster.
WHAT IS CONFLICT?
1) It is the situation where there is no peace within individual or between two or more
parties. It may also be termed as in- fighting, dispute, war, opposition, disagreement
between two parties as well as mental and emotional struggle.
2) It can generate between a boss and a subordinate between;
a) a husband and wife.
b) among family members.
c) clans.
d) nation
e) church
f) organization etc.
Again conflict can be defined as;
i)
ii)
iii)
iv)
Disagreement between people.
Misunderstanding between two.
A lack of agreement between two parties.
Is disagreement between people which prevents them from achieving their goals or set
objectives? In summary, conflict is misunderstanding or disagreement between
individuals, parties, factions resulting in divisions and unachievement set of goals. Is a
process which begins when one party perceive that another party has frustrated or is
about to frustrate some concern of his.
SOURCES OF CONFLICT:
1)
2)
3)
4)
5)
6)
7)
8)
9)
Mistrust.
Misunderstanding.
Frustration.
Organizational change.
Stress.
Wrong information.
Cultural difference.
Undefined role.
Struggle for position.
10) Misappropriate of funds.
11) Insecurity.
12) State of mind.
13) Cheating.
14) Difference in temperament.
15) Ideological difference.
16) Lack of information.
17) Lack of motivation.
18) Loss of confidence.
19) Nepotism.
20) Position misfit.
A) Difference in perception has to do with;
 Understanding and perspective.
 Value judgment can be a potential source of conflict. The kind of perception
that makes one to the judgment conclusion. E.g. our values are condition in
our experience.
B) Limited resources. There will be criteria for selection of resources and that can
lead to frustration.
 Access and control.
 Criteria for access (stiff and frustration).
 Departmentalization and specialization. Multidependent skill in
organization. Hospital and that leads to (role conflict) doctors, pathologist,
pharmacist, nurses etc.
 The nature of work or relationship and activities (role conflict). There are
issues of language. There are issues of procedure. E.g. pastors wife who was
sick and the general secretary issue?
TYPES OF CONFLICTS?
1) Latent or submerged (active but invisible).
2) Exposed or full- blown.
 Latent or submerged. It means the sign are active but invisible.
 Because of the fact that nobody want to be accused.
MANIFESTATION OF LATENT CONFLICT.
A) Withdrawal or inactivity= someone who wants to be an active in the
organization will come but not talk.
B) Foot dragging = It is another way of clearly drawing out.
C) Lateness or absenteeism = occasionally even not to care of going to
work.
EXPOSED OR FULL – BLOWN.
MANIFESTATION:
a) Open hostility.
b) Verbal exchanges. E.g. Allow flare ups. It is a way of detecting the
degree of the system.it will let you know the real issue of the
matter.
c) Resignations.
d) Sanctions- when there is excessive of sanction then there is conflict.
It can also be seen as exposed conflict.
WHAT ARE THE TRIGGERS?
That are the critical issue left from both latent and exposed. Trigger is not the point but the
exposed. If you can identify the trigger, it will let you detect the cause. A lot of people have said
that conflict is good in marriage.


Reactive management.
Another areas that brings conflict are;
I)
Social.
II)
Religious believe.
III)
Politics.
IV)
Physical
HOW TO DEVELOP YOUR CAREER AND KEEP LOVE IN YOUR MARRIAGE?


Even if your career is already in place, you should make sure that it helps
make your marriage successful.
One good test is the policy of joint agreement. Is your spouse enthusiastic
about it?

HOW TO RESOLVE FINANCIAL CONFLICTS AND KEEP LOVE IN YOUR MARRIAGE?



Gain perspective in your financial decision.
Unless you make these decisions with each other’s feelings in mind.
I guarantee that you will lose love for each other and probably lose most of
your money too.
CONCLUSION:
Let the peace of GOD in the mist of thee help you to avoid conflicts in your marriage.