Positive Parenting and Promoting Learning in the Home John Sharry www.solutiontalk.ie www.parentsplus.ie Parenting - An important note THERE IS NO ONE RIGHT WAY TO BRING UP CHILDREN What matters is finding a way that works for you, your children and your family BE CAREFUL ABOUT PARENTING EXPERTS Trust your own intuition and test ideas in your own experience © John Sharry 2009 Parents Plus Programmes Video based parenting courses developed by the Parents Plus Charity in the Mater Hospital www.parentsplus.ie © John Sharry 2009 Current Parents Plus Programmes Parents Plus Early Years Programme ( 1- 6 year olds) John Sharry, Grainne Hampson, Mary Fanning Parents Plus Childrens Programme (6-11 year olds) John Sharry, Carol Fitzpatrick Parents Plus Adolescents Programme (11 – 16 years olds) John Sharry, Carol Fitzpatrick The importance of parents supportnng learning The problem of learning in the home Positive Parenting and Promoting Learning in the Home Parenting – Getting the Balance Right POSITIVE PARENTING Being loving, Caring Encouraging © John Sharry 2009 POSITIVE DISCIPLINE Being firm, Able to set rules Teach child to behave Learning/ Homework – Getting the Balance Right POSITIVE PARENTING Fun learning Follow child’s lead and motivation © John Sharry 2009 POSITIVE DISCIPLINE Homework routine/rules Consequences/ rewards Principle ‘Tuning into your Child’s Unique Motivations, Strengths and Talents’ www.solutiontalk.ie A holistic view of Intelligence Verbal Language Reading Writing Experiential Natural Maths Logic Social Interpersonal Design/ Motor Athletic , Physical Musical Rhythm Principle ‘Supporing your child in their areas of weakness and demotivation’ REFLECTION Thinking of each of your children individually, • What are their talent, motivations s and area of strength? • What are their areas of weakness and demotivation? ? Principle ‘Establishing a Routine in the Home’ Principle ‘Encouraging your child in their homework Principle ‘Encouraging your child in their homework – Three Steps ’ 1) Helping your child plan and get started 2) Being there to support and encourage 3) Reviewing how your child has got on Further talks and information Positive Parenting Book – 8 Euro Parenting articles and features www.solutiontalk.ie Parents Plus Programmes www.parentsplus.ie www.facebook.com/solutiontalk Q&A: healthsupplement@irishtimes.com Principle ‘Switch from Criticism to Encouragement’ Criticism Cycle Parent notices what child is doing wrong Parent/ child Relationship can suffer Parent corrects or criticises Negative perception Child can feel defensive or undermined Parent in critical role Positive Encouragment cycle Parent notices what child is doing right Parent/ child Relationship improves Parent specifically praises Positive perception Child enjoys praise Parent feels good Five types of Encouragements 1) Acknowleging Feelings 2) Focusing on what is right, what is done well 3) Stating a positive goal or intention 4) Listening to your child’s positive intention 5) Expressing positive belief Becoming an encouraging parent 2) Why are you always late starting your homework? Encouraging Parent • I know you are upset at having to leave • Oh you got your books out, that is a start 3)That is the wrong place to put it • Put it here?/Let me show you 4) Why are you so aggressive with your brother • I know you can get on with your brother 5) Why didn’t you pick the blue block? • Oh you picked the green block, you like green Critical Parent 1) Why are you so angry?