Girl Scouts of Colorado
I Said, She Said:
Conflict Resolution for
Girl Scouts
Intro/Kickoff
• Introduce yourself to
those you don’t
know.
• Familiarize yourself with
the contents
of the workbook .
• Finish this statement:
“In life, conflict
is …”
What to Expect
• Conflict Overview
• How to Minimize Conflict
• Facilitating Others in
Conflict
• Tips for Working through
Conflict
• Close
Typical Causes of Conflict
• Wants or Needs Differ
• Values Differ
• Perceptions Differ
• Inaccurate or Faulty Assumptions
• Expectations Differ
Defining Conflict
1. A state of disagreement,
controversy, or
disharmony. The
opposition of mutually
exclusive desires,
tendencies, etc.
2. Expressed struggle
between at least 2
parties, who perceive
incompatible goals,
Common Beliefs About Conflict
• Conflict is negative.
• Conflict will resolve itself if
left alone.
• Conflict must be resolved
immediately.
• Conflict is destructive.
Conflict Spiral
Changing your Paradigm
about Conflict
High Stakes
From Crucial Conversations
How to Minimize
Conflict
• Keys to Troop Management
• How Girl Scouts Look at
Conflict
• Tools for Leaders
• Your role …
How Girl Scouts Look at Conflict
• What is GSUSA’s view of Conflict?
• Can something good come from a conflict
situation within a troop?
• What supports/tools are there for you as a
leader?
5 Keys to Successful
Troop Management
1. Adults who actively work in partnership
with girls
2. A place where girls feel secure,
trusted and valued
3. Girls’ ownership of activities
4. Girls’ planning activities
5. Girls and adults who respect and like
each other
Good Boundaries
• Boundaries set up expectations
• How can boundaries reduce
conflict?
• What Girl Scout traditions
establish boundaries?
Group Agreement
•
•
•
•
Establish common ground
Describe observable behaviors
Define boundaries
May include consequences for
violations
• In Girl Scouts, should be based on the
Promise & Law
• Have advantage of being participantled & participant-monitored for
better buy-in
Your role:
Facilitating Others
Through Conflict
Step 1: Determine Ground Rules
How to Fight Fair
Step 2: Discuss and Define the
Problem
What is Going On?
Step 3: Jointly Develop a Desired
Outcome
What Do We Both Want?
Step 4: Determine a Plan
How Will We Get It?
Step 5: Commit to Follow Up
Words of Wisdom (Best Practices)
When Working Through Conflict:
BEFORE
• Focus on behaviors and consequences
of behaviors; be specific.
o
Be prepared to explain a specific
behavior you want instead of the
behavior you don’t want.
• Take ownership of your behavior and
feelings.
o
o
Think about where you can agree and what
YOU are willing to change ahead of time.
Ask yourself: “What am I pretending not
to notice about my role in this?”
• Try to humanize the other person.
o
Ask yourself: “Why would a reasonable,
rational, and decent person do what they
are doing?”
Words of Wisdom (Best Practices)
When Working Through Conflict:
DURING
• Use active listening behaviors.
o
Make it safe for others to express their
opinions, needs, etc.
• Talk tentatively to soften the message:
o
o
o
“The fact is…” (vs)  “In my opinion…”
“Everyone knows that…” (vs)  “I’ve
talked to 3 others who share my view…”
“It’s clear to me ..” (vs)  “I’m
beginning to wonder …”
• Try to remain open to a variety of
solutions and compromises.
o
Encourage testing. Ask: “What am I
missing here?” or “I’d really want to
hear from you”
• Take time out when feelings heat up.
Words of Wisdom (Best Practices)
When Working Through Conflict:
AFTER
• Follow up on your
commitments.
• Hold a brief ‘debrief’ to
prompt continuous
improvement & learning.
o What did we do well?
o What could/should we do better
next time?
How will YOU
‘Take Action’?
Write down something
that you have learned
during this session that
you will be able to use
with your troop.
Questions?
Thank you!