What I noticed… 
Most people
 Used
 Tried to integrate their quotes
 Referenced their quotes
 Referred to the titles and authors in their topic sentence
 Used a point by point comparison
 Had good ideas 
Many people
 Misunderstood
 As
 Did
the prompt
result, they gave the wrong information
not introduce the characters
 “they”
 Did
not integrate quotes properly or explain them
 Did not provide a concluding sentence for each
 Did not use transition words between ideas
Misunderstood the question
In a multi-paragraph (3 or more paragraphs)
expository essay of at least 300 words, discuss the
qualities that Erik Weihenmayer in “Blindy He Goes
…Up” and Uncle Jim in “Versabraille” share in
facing their challenges. You must refer to both
What are qualities?
Did not introduce characters
Throughout the passages, “Blindly He Goes…Up”
by Steve Rushin and “Versabraille” by Bill
Schermbrucker, they share similarities when dealing
with their challenges.
Who is they?
 We
don’t know!
Introducing Characters
Erik Weihenmayer in “Blindy He Goes …Up” by
Steve Rushin and Uncle Jim in “Versabraille” by Bill
Schermbrucker, both share the same qualities.
Integrating quotes
You need to introduce your quote
It cannot just appear in your writing.
This means, do no start a sentence with a quote.
 Use
an introductory phrase
Introductory Phrases
For example, “blah blah blah” (para 4).
For instance, “blah blah blah” (para 5).
In the story, it says “ blah blah blah” (para 3).
[Character name] states, “blah blah blah” (para 8).
More sophisticated introductions
He states that he does not climb Everest “because
it’s there” but rather “because we’re here” (para 6).
In addition, to his own daily obstacles, Jim was
“raising money to buy Versabraille machines” and
“speaking out against guide dogs” (para 3).
Integrating the quote into part of your point is
Concluding Sentences
For each paragraph you write, you must have a
concluding sentence.
This ties together your points and reinforces your
See handout.
Use transition words
The best way to synthesize information is to use
transition words to connect your ideas together.
Look at your transition words sheet.
 Which
words can be used when comparing?
See handout.
Practice Task
Plan out an essay using the same two stories, for
each of the 4 other types of questions.
1. Compare/Contrast
2. Character X vs. character Y.
3. Who is better…
4. Asses…
1. Compare and Contrast
Compare and contrast how Erik Weihenmayer from
“Blindy He Goes…Up” and Jim from
“Versabrailles” deal with their challenges.
2. Character X vs. Character Y
Discuss the ways in which Erik Weihenmayer in
“Blindly He Goes…Up” would likely respond to Jim
in “Versabraille”.
3. Who is better…
Which character Erik Weihenmayer in “Blindly He
Goes…Up” or Uncle Jim in “Versabraille” is the
better role model for people who are blind. You
must refer to both passages in your essay
4. Assess…
Assess the role that optimism plays in the lives of
Eric Weihenmayer in “Blindy He Goes…Up” and
Uncle Jim in “Versabraille”.