Business Writing Workshop
Course Objectives
By the end of this workshop you will be able to:

Write business communications that are clear, precise
and appropriate to your audience.

Organize and write clear and concise emails that are
appropriate to your company’s business culture.

Write emails for different situations: complaining,
requesting, enquiring.
Course Outline

The Writing Process

Email Writing

Purposes of Writing
Reflection…

What’s Business Writing?
 Why ?
 How?
Reflection:

How many times have you received an email and
felt a little put off by the message even though it
was from a good friend?

Have you ever sent an email that upset or
confused someone?

What was it like to be in that situation and what
did you do to clear up the misunderstanding?
Activity

In two groups, please identify what makes a
good/poor piece of witting?
In case your message has not been
understood . . .
Some questions you might ask are . . .
 Did your expressions or language create
confusion?
 Was your timing poor?
 Was your language too long so that the main
points were lost?
 Were your tone and manner appropriate?
 Did you not structure the message logically?
The Writing Process
Planning to write:
1.
–
–
–
Determine your purpose
Analyze the reader
Choose the right tone
Organizing thoughts:
2.
–
–
–
Writing the first draft :
3.
–
–
–
–
Project the right image
Establish your credibility
Build rapport
Emphasize your main points
4.
Editing the document :
State the main topic
Explain how you’ll present –
Check the content and
the information
organization
Include all your evidence
–
Check its readability
–
Check the format
–
Check the mechanics
The Planning Process
The purpose
 The reader
 The tone
 The content

Planning to Write:
The Purpose
Why am I writing?
Request
 Inform
 Complain
 Handle a complaint
 Order

Planning to Write:
Know your reader
Know your reader

Business writing is persuasive writing.

At the most basic level, business writing seeks to
convince the reader that what is being said is
true.

Some business writing will try to persuade the
reader to take an action or think about something
in a certain way.
Know your reader

You will be able to write most persuasively
if you know your audience and their
expectations and if you organize your
message to address their needs.
Know your reader
1.
2.
Sometimes you will know your audience
personally.
Other times you will not know your audience
personally, or you will need to write to more
than one person.
1. When you KNOW your reader

Put yourself in your reader’s place and look
at your message through that person’s eyes.

If your message does not meet your reader’s
needs or if it isn’t written at his or her level of
understanding, your message may be
ignored.
1. When you KNOW your reader

Before you write, ask yourself these questions about
your reader:
– How interested or involved in the subject is my reader?
– How knowledgeable is he or she on the subject?
– What is my reader’s purpose for reading? To make a decision? To
be better informed?
– Does my reader have special concerns or strong views about the
subject? What are they?
– How does my reader regard me personally and professionally?
– What is my reader’s style of doing business?
2. When you DON’T Know your reader

There are two general types of business
readers: skimmers & skeptics.

Your documents will be most effective if you
write for both types of readers.
2. When you DON’T Know your reader

Skimmers are readers
that are typically very
busy. Pressed for time,
they often skim
documents in a rather
short period of time.
The documents you
prepare for skimmers
should:
 State the main point clearly
and up front.
 Place the most important
information at the beginning
or ending of paragraphs.
 Highlight key dates or
figures.
2. When you DON’T Know your reader

The second type of
reader is a Skeptic. A
Skeptic is a reader that
is cautious and
doubtful.

Skeptical readers will
tend to read a
document carefully,
questioning its validity
and the writer’s claims.
Planning to Write:
The Tone
In written communication, you don’t have
gesture, expression, or inflection to help
convey your meaning. You must rely on
words alone.
 Tone is the document’s overall emotional
temperature; warm, friendly, chatty,
businesslike, firm, accusatory, simplistic, or
angry
 It is not what you say, but how you say it.

Activity
Did you really think you could get away with
taking my security lighting system back to
“fix it” and not refund my money? This piece
of junk has never worked right, and I don’t
want it fixed or a new one – I want my money
back so I can buy one that works. Is this plain
enough for your employees?
Editing
KIS
 Avoid long confusing sentences
 Sentence clarity
 Redundancy

KIS- Jargons
Trust Deposit option
 Laparoscopic procedure
 No load
 70 Ib text duplex finish
 GAAP
 Power of sale

KIS- Jargons
Trust Deposit option
 Laparoscopic procedure
 No load
 70 Ib text duplex finish
 GAAP
 Power of sale

KIS- Long confusing sentences
(Run-on Sentences)
Example:
Regarding the matter of the employees
parking lot, due to the fact that it poses a
safety hazard as it is being handled at
present, all employees need to, at this time,
park on the east side until such time as the
construction is, in the near future as is hoped,
completed.
52 words!!
KIS- Long confusing sentences
(Run-on Sentences)
Determine whether the following are run-on
sentences. If so, rewrite the sentence to correct
the error.

The report should be done by next Monday,
however, George has been late in reviewing it,
and I have been unable to revise it.

Jerry will write the report on Monday and edit it
on Tuesday.
KIS- Too many words (Redundancy)
Instead of






In the majority of instances
As you may or may not know
Of a confidential nature
In advance of
In the event of/that
I would like to make a
suggestionI
Write






Usually
as you may know
Confidential
Before
If
suggest
KIS- Too many words (Redundancy)
Get rid of any unnecessary information:

"In order to keep you informed of the results
of the sales meeting held on February 10 to
consider ways and means of reducing the cost
of the proposed spring sales campaign, we
are submitting herewith a brief resume and
the procedure outlined for the cost reduction
plan."
KIS- Complicated words
Instead of
 Ascertain
 Optimum
 Utilize
 Concept
Write




Find out
Best
Use
Idea
Use Active/Passive Voice Appropriately

Passive voice has three basic characteristics:
1. Subject
2. A form of the verb “to be” (is, am, are, was,
were, be, been, or being).
3. the past participle

E.g. “The matter is being looked into by the
committee.”
Use Active/Passive Voice Appropriately

Passive voice is often overused in business
writing.

A writer uses passive voice to purposefully
leave out the actor or subject of the sentence in
an effort to sound more diplomatic.
Use Active/Passive Voice Appropriately
Active:
You are past due on your registration payment.
 Passive:
Your registration payment is past due.
 The passive example is less confrontational. It
takes the actor out of the sentence so that the
message does not appear to blame someone.

Use Active/Passive Voice Appropriately
Which is better?

Our restaurant has been recommended by all
leading hotels in Singapore.

All leading hotels in Singapore recommend
our restaurant.
Use Active/Passive Voice Appropriately
Which is better?

People heard the noise all over the place.

The noise was heard all over the place.
Use Active/Passive Voice Appropriately
Which is better?

Claire made an unfortunate mistake.

An unfortunate mistake was made.
E-Mail Writing
Email Guidelines
Determine whether email is the most
appropriate vehicle for your message
 Order and limit your information
 Write with the proper tone for your audience
 Decide to whom the email should be sent
 Write a meaningful subject line
 Attach files responsibly

How To Create Electronic Rapport
1-Don’t just dive into your message.
Try to ease the reader into your message by giving
some basic background information.


Be warm and friendly in your opening where possible.
How To Create Electronic Rapport
For example:
It was good to speak to you this morning. I’m
glad we were able to clarify this issue.

Thanks for calling me today. It was so good to
speak to you after all this time.

How To Create Electronic Rapport
Thanks for a great lunch yesterday. Your new
project certainly sounds very interesting.

I’m so sorry to hear about the problem you’ve
experienced with your new LCD projector.

How To Create Electronic Rapport
2-Show some feelings.
Showing some empathy in your message will help
you to form a better bond with your readers.

How To Create Electronic Rapport
For example:

I appreciate your understanding.
I certainly see what you mean, and hope we can
resolve this problem.


I am happy to offer you an extra discount of 10%.
I am pleased to know you will be visiting Mumbai
next month.

How To Create Electronic Rapport
3-Keep your messages positive & focused.
Two essential ingredients of e-mail messages are:

Keeping a positive attitude towards your reader

Maintaining a focus on their needs.
Try to be diplomatic and never be afraid to apologize of
something has gone wrong.
How To Create Electronic Rapport
4-Tailor the tone of your message.

Distinguish personal from business e-mails.
 Avoid
using abbreviations, exclamation marks and slang
when writing to clients.
How To Create Electronic Rapport
5-Be precise & clear

Pay attention to what is being asked and respond
clearly.

If you are not precise this will make more work
because a further e-mail will be necessary.
Netiquette
Never leave a response too long.
E-mail addresses must be correct.
Take off the caps lock. DON’T SHOUT!!
Informality is OK in e-mails.
Question your subject heading.
Netiquette
Use short sentences and short paragraphs.
Enumerate with numbers or bullets.
Tidy up long sentences to eliminate waffle.
Take pride in your finished message.
Ensure everything is right before you hit ‘send’.
Activity I
From
sallyturner@rightway.com
Date
23:05 16.06.09
To
johnwrong@rightway.com
Subject
John
Appreciate if you wouldconsider and bear in mind that I am no
longer responsible for dealing with petty cash some of your staff
keep bringing me vouchrs, but this responsibility has been taken
over by Martin in Accounts. He is the one who should be contacted
for all petty cash matters henceforthyou cooperation is appreciated
in making sure all your staff know about this.
Sally
The Format of a Business
E-mail

Follow the rules of spelling.

Do not type all on capital letters.

Divide your message into paragraphs and keep
your paragraphs short.

Start your email with the most important part.

Try to keep the email brief (one screen length).

Use caps when appropriate.

Write an appropriate and specific subject in the
subject line.

Check for punctuation, spelling, and grammatical
errors.

Avoid the use of smiles and winks in formal writing.

Include a block signature specifying:
–
–
–
–
Your name
your position
Affiliation
Contact info.
The Recipient

To : To the one who is going to respond.

CC: To whom I am sending a copy of the e-mail
without waiting for a reply.

If the secretary is going to respond, include the
secretary in TO and send it the person in charge
in CC.
The Recipient

BCC: In this line the recipient is hidden to the
other recipients in TO and CC.

The recipient in BCC is able to see the other
recipients in TO and CC.
Purposes of Writing






Requests
Replies
Informing
Delivering bad news
Writing a complaint
Handling a complaint
Request

An opening section providing the background
context to the forthcoming request.

The request or action line-usually one sentence which
states what exactly is being requested.

A thank you line-usually expressing gratitude in
advance for the recipient's fulfilling of the request.

A closing salutation or sign off line.
Reply
A
section or line referring to the previous
communication.
 The
answer section, containing the information
which was requested.
A
closing salutation or "sign off" line.
Informing

An opening section providing the background
context to the forthcoming Information.

Inform the reader of the reasons behind sending
the fax.

A closing salutation or sign off line.
Writing A Complaint

You should briefly state the history of the
problem to provide context for your reader.

Explain the attempts you made previously to
resolve the problem.

Show why it is critical for the problem to be
resolved by your reader.

Offer suggestions on ways you think it can be
resolved or how you are willing to help in the
matter.
Handling Complaints

Ask for clarification.

Personalize your response.

Nothing infuriates an angry customer more than the
feeling that no one is listening.

Use the customer’s name and title.
Handling Complaints

Tell the customer how you will respond to the
problem.

Use a polite, positive tone.

Acknowledge the customer’s pain and suffering.

Never blame your customer.

When you are at fault, apologize.
Delivering Bad News

Deliver the news up front.

Avoid blaming statements.

Avoid words that sound ambiguous.

Maintain a positive tone.
Flaming in E-mails

The term flaming means sending one’s emotions
overtly and inappropriately. Thus, try to avoid flaming
in all business writings.
Example
Flaming
A nicer way
"This project really sucks "These tasks came at a
and I cannot believe that
tough time. I wasn’t
he is making us do this.
expecting so much work.
The tasks are too much for
me. I need a break.
Subject: Upgrades
Date: 5/28/2005
From: sammy@dataport.org
To: newtech@widedoor.com
Attachment: Document 1
_________________________________________________
HEY GUYS
R U AWAKE OUT THERE. THIS IS THE THIRD TIME I HAVE SENT
THIS MESSAGE. AND I NEED YOU TO GET BACK TO ME STAT. MY
BOSS IS ON MY BACK.
I NEED THE UPGRADES YOUR SALES FOLKS – ROBERT T., JAN
W., AND GRAF H. – PROMISED BUT NEVER MADE GOOD ON.
FWIW YOU HAVE MISSED THE BOAT
SAMMY
Subject: Upgrades for Service Contract #4552
Date: 5/28/2005
From: sammy@dataport.org
To: newtech@widedoor.com
Attachment: Service Agreement ____________________________________________
Hello Janet
I would appreciate your delivering the upgrades for our service contract #4552 by Monday
afternoon, the 22nd of June, if at all possible.
We need to proceed to the next phase of our operation and the upgrades are crucial to that desk.
I am attaching a copy of our service agreement with New-Tech for your convenience. The file is an
MS Word 2000 document under the name “Service Agreement”.
If you run into any problem with the delivery date please give me a call this afternoon or e-mail me.
Thanks
Sammy
Samuel Atherton
Operations Assistant
Data Port
4300 Morales Highway
San Padre, CA 95620-0326
Voicemail: 723 555 1298
http://dataport.com
Activity II
From
Grace.peng@global.com
Date
09:40 20.11.08
To
robinzang@midway.com
Subject
Your Complaint
your complaint about your faxmachine that you brought
from us last year hs been sent to my attn. please be informed
that your policy doucment show that you only have a one
year guarantee for these products and it ran out in 2nd dec. so
if you want it fixed you will have to pay for it.
Let me know what do you want.
Faxes
General Tips

If writing to a Chair of a Committee, letters should
be addressed to "Mr. Chairman or Madam
Chairwoman."

Keep it short. Faxes should not be more than one
page long.

It should contain a readable return address and
telephone number.

Make sure your fax is written eligibly (it should be
typed).

Only focus on ONE issue at a time. You are more
effective when you concentrate on a single issue.

Always be courteous. Do not scold or preach.

Flaming in these letters (faxes) will only weaken and
damage your opinion.

End your fax by saying "Thank You" and " I look
forward to your response". This way you will
receive a written response.
 If
you are sending a document together with the fax,
state clearly how many pages are to be sent.
 Include
a block signature:
-Name
-Position
-Affiliation
-Contact information
Activity VI

You work for the managing director of Stanfield
Engineering who is presently visiting clients of your
company in the Caribbean. During his absence you
receive two important quotations for major office
renovations. You know that your employer wants
work to commence urgently on these renovations but
he is not expected back for some time. Send him a
fax message at his hotel, enclosing the quotations
and ask him for instructions.