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HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS
Intro
(Insert Generic Intro Here)
How Self Improvement Can Make Social Interaction
Easier
I’m not a prep of prep time and theory crafting i.e. (Pill shit and the mentality that
believes that you have to plan and craft for everything before taking action). It’s stupid
but only to an extent. Since you are on self improvement you can take advantage of
some habits/activities that can be beneficial to your socialization. In my experience I
learned by going out into the field and doing things the old fashion way but that doesn’t
mean that you have to. Let’s take meditation for example.
Meditation
Kills intrusive thoughts and allows you to be more present in the moment which is key
for social interaction and making friends. When you drift off and lose interest in the
person that you’re talking to you tend to hold the conversation a lot worse and the
relationship worsen. Meditation solves and mitigates this issue by honing your mind and
your focus. This is beneficial in all aspects of life but is absolutely necessary when it
comes to social interaction and befriending individuals. The more present you are the
more you catch onto what the other person is saying, making you more prepared to
answer questions, give feedback and essentially gel better with the person you’re
interacting with.
NoFap
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Sigh I really don’t want to talk about this one but yeah there are benefits to NoFap. No it
won’t give you social superpowers on it’s own, it won’t give you a harem of women
ready to suck your toes and it won’t solve your lack of meaningful friendships but it will
put your mind in the right place, especially when it comes to talking with women. You
don’t want to be mid conversation and all you can think about is raw dogging the chick
you’re talking too. I pretty much have never had that problem unless I’m flirting with the
chick and we’re touching but in a casual context, never. It’s self control and if there’s any
benefit from Nofap it has to be that. Self Control. You don’t want to have a chronic porn
addiction when talking to women that you want to befriend or get to know. Trust me on
that.
The Server
Virtual interaction can never completely replace in person interaction but if that’s the
best that you have to work with then you have to utilize and make the most of it. This
server and Hamza’s Cult is the best place to take action when it comes to upping your
social game. We have plenty of voice chats where people are always willing to discuss
with each other and simply hang out. This also allows you to build up your confidence
and stuff. Even for something like this you can hop on the lecture stage in front of
dozens if not hundreds of people. I recommend that you go ahead and do that. That’s
where I met a lot of people on this server who I would consider my friends and my
brothers. Highly recommend. 13 year old me didn’t have this when he was growing up
but damn it would have helped when done in conjunction with social interaction outside.
You can also ask for social advice too and feedback on your social endeavours. Overall
it’s a major launching pad that can give you a substantial advantage when it comes to
making friends.
Breaking Down Aspects And Concepts
Where You Should Go
I don’t know if anyone still does this or not but I made a majority of my friends by simply
going outside and playing on the street. We’re going to discount friends made in school
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because that environment is pretty much setup for you to succeed in doing such a task.
Instead we’re going to go on hard mode and just assume that you moved into a new
place on a street where you don’t know anyone so you pretty much have no tools to
work with apart from your wits. Despite these facts you have to find a way to make
things work. It’s tough but that’s life. I had to do something similar when I moved into an
apartment in Dublin years ago. I knew like nobody but the first thing me and my brother
got to doing was making friends. This was early 2010s so kids didn’t have their eyes
glued to their phones and instead were actually outside playing football an shit. So I
vaguely remember what happened that day. My brother walked across to one of the
lads, who I’m still friends with to this day and know pretty well I might add, and asked:
“Can we join in?” The lad said yeah cause the more people playing the better. Obviously
stuff like this isn’t that common but it all depends where you look. But there’s something
I want to take away from what I just described to you. When you’re young, you tend to
be pretty bold and don’t give a shit. That’s the magic that most of us have lost as we’ve
grown older. We need to remember how it was like to be that free but I digress.
Places. There’s school obviously but I’ll start there since a lot of people tend to dodge
these ones.
School
Clubs (elaborate) + Extra curricular activities.
Shared interests in most clubs. People have shared common interest(s) so it’s
easier to initiate conversation with these people.
Have fun while socializing
Pretty much easy mode if you’re looking for a soft cold approach
Interaction is pretty much forced
Quality
Usually if not always free.
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Outside of School Clubs
If you want to add more diversity to your group of friends then this is the place
Just like the last option you pretty much have an advantage with these people
cause you have a common interest.
Don’t be a pain in the ass and only approach these people if they’re not busy.
After a few sessions and shit you can work up to arranging something outside of the
club and it’s all the better if they live a lot closer to you.
Quality
Where you live
Whether it’s some apartment or some street, there are probably people your age
who you can join in with to play (Pretty old-school, not sure if people even do this
anymore lol).
Quality can very
Good practice for social skills (all these options pretty much are. You’re going to
have to work yourself
Commitment and being proactive
You’re going to have to go out of your way to grow these relationships so be ready
to give a lot of your time as well as your effort.
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You’re going to have to be an initiator. Organize events and outings on socials (yes
you’re most likely going to need socials)
If you want to keep things alive at first you might have to agree to a lot of outings
but remember to not let it get in the way of your routine.
Remember to ask for the person’s social. Snap, insta, phone number… anything
works
How to win friends and influence people (MUST READ CONTENT)
Principle 1
Become genuinely interested in other people
Principle 2
Smile + EYE CONTACT AND BODY LANGUAGE
Principle 3
Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important
sound in any language.
Principle 4
Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
Principle 5
Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.
Principle 6
Make the other person feel important-and do it sincerely
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Confrontations and arguments will kill all your relationships. There’s a time and
place for everything. If you’re looking to befriend someone or keep a friendship
alive, hopping into arguments and debates won’t do you any good! Aim to be
agreeable and respect the other person’s opinion in order to not jeopardize the
friendship
Win your friends and people you want to befriend over to your way of thinking! You
can do this by showing off the benefits that you received from self improvement.
Good self esteem, charisma, good physique, newly acquired social adeptness etc.
Give the other person the spotlight. Let them do the majority of the talking but be
attentive in order to be able to add in when the opportunity arises, answer questions
and win the person over.
Aim to go for deep conversations instead of small talk. Future plans, career
options… interesting stuff so that the convo doesn’t run dry.
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