Understanding thesis statements
For each thesis statement below, single-underline the topic and double-underline the controlling idea
that the writer wishes to express about the topic. (4pts)
- Our cafeteria would be greatly improved if several changes were made.
- Stress in the fast-food workplace has led to serious physical, psychological, and emotional
problems for employees.
Identifying the parts of an essay
The cluster below contains one topic, one thesis statement, and two supporting sentences. In the
space provided, label each item as follows (4pts):
T -- topic
TH -- thesis statement
SS -- supporting sentence
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______ a. Reading
______ b. Parents can take steps to encourage their children to enjoy reading.
______ c. The adults’ own behavior can influence children to become readers.
______ d. Parents can make sure the physical environment of the home encourages reading.
Revising essays for unity, support, coherence, and sentence skills.
In this activity, comments follow the paragraphs. Circle the letter of the statement that applies in each
case. (3pts)
The Hazards of Being an Only Child
1. Many people who have grown up in multichild families think that being an only child is the
best of all possible worlds. They point to such benefits as the only child’s annual new
wardrobe and the lack of competition for parental love, but single child status isn’t as good
as people say it is. Instead of having everything they want. Only children are sometimes
denied certain basic human needs.
2. Only children lack companionship. An only child can have trouble making friends since he or
she isn’t used to being around other children. Often, the only child comes home to an empty
house: both parents are working and there are no brothers or sisters to pay with or to talk
to about the day. At dinner, the single child can’t tell jokes, giggle, or throw food while the
adults discuss boring adult subjects. An only child always has his or her own room but never
has anyone to whisper to half the night when sleep doesn’t come. Some only children thrive
on this isolation and channel their energies into creative activities like writing or drawing.
Owing to this lack of companionship, an only child sometimes lacks the social ease and selfconfidence that come from being part of a close-knit group of contemporaries.
a.
b.
c.
d.
Paragraph 1 contains one fragment.
Paragraph 2 contains an irrelevant sentence.
Paragraph 2 lacks supporting details in one spot.
Paragraph 2 lacks transitional words.
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Providing transitions
In the spaces provided, add appropriate transitions to tie together the sentences and ideas in the
below passage. Draw from the words given in the boxes above the paragraph. Use each word only
once. Add punctuation where necessary. (6pts)
Annoying people
President Richard Nixon used to keep an enemies list of all the people he didn’t especially like.
I’m shamed to confess it, but I, too, have an enemies list – a mental one. On this list are all the people I
would gladly live without, the ones who cause my blood pressure to rise to the boiling point. the top
three places on the list go to people with annoying nervous habits, people who talk in movie theaters,
and people who talk on cell phones while driving.
For example
First of all
Another
However
--------------------------------- there are the people with annoying nervous habits.
--------------------------------- there are the ones who make faces. When in deep thought, they twitch,
squint, and frown, and they can be a real distract when I’m trying to concentrate during an exam. ----------------------- type of nervous character makes useless designs. These people bend paper clips into
abstract sculptures or string the clips into necklaces as they talk.
--------------------------------- neither of these groups is as bad as the people who make noises. These
individuals, when they are feeling uncomfortable, bite their fingernails or crack their knuckles. If they
have a pencil in their hands, they tap it rhythmically against whatever surface is handy – a desk, a book,
a head. Lacking a pencil to play with, they jingle the loose change or keys in their pockets. These people
make me wish I were hard of hearing.
Identifying transitions
Underline the four-time signals in the following selection (4pts):
After you have snagged the job of TV sports reporter, you have to begin working on the details of
your image. First, invest in two of the three truly loud sports jackets. Look for gigantic plaid patterns
in odd color combinations like purple and green or orange and blue. These should become familiar
enough to viewers so that they will associate that crazy jacket with that dynamic sportscaster. Next,
try to cultivate a distinctive voice that will be just annoying enough to be memorable. Be sure to
speak only in tough, punchy sentences that seem to be punctuated with imaginary exclamation
points. Finally, you must share lots of pompous, obnoxious opinions with your viewers. If the home
team loses, call them bums. If players strike, talk sarcastically about the good old days.
Editing
Locate the seven sentence-skills mistakes in the following passage. The mistakes are listed in the box
below. As you locate each mistake, write the number of the sentence in the space provided. Then, in
the space between the lines, edit and correct each mistake. (7pts)
1 fragment --------1 run-on -------
1 missing comma after introductory material ------1 mistake in verb tense --------2
1 nonparallel structure -------missing apostrophe -------
1 mistake in pronoun -------
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(1) The greatest of my everyday fears is technology. (2) Beginning when I couldn’t master bike
riding and extending to the present day. (3) Fear kept me from learning to operate a jigsaw, start an
outboard motor, or even using a simple tape recorder. (4) I almost didn’t learn to drive a car. (5) At
age sixteen, Dad lifted the hood of our Chevy and said, “All right, you’re going to start learning to
drive. Now, this is the distributor….”. (6) When my eyes glazed over, he shouted, “Well, I’m not going
to bother if youre not interested!” (7) Fortunately, the friend who later taught me to drive skipped
what goes under the hood. (8) My most recent frustration is the digital camera. (9) I would love to
take professional quality pictures all the buttons and tiny electronic menus confuse me. (10) As a
result my unused camera is hidden away on a shelf in my closet. (11) Just last week, my sister gives
me a beautiful digital watch for my birthday. (12) I may have to put it on the shelf with the camera –
the alarm keeps going off, and you can’t figure out how to stop it.
Practice in Organizing and Connecting Specific Evidence
Use time order (numbers 1, 2, 3) to organize the scrambled lists of supporting ideas below. Write 1
beside the supporting idea that should come first in time, 2 beside the idea that logically follows, and
3 beside the idea that comes last in time. (6pts)
Thesis: Applying for unemployment benefits was a confusing and frustrating experience.
_____ It was difficult to find both the office and a place to park.
_____ When I finally reached the head of the line after four hours of waiting, the clerk had problems
processing my claim.
_____ There was no one to direct or help me when I entered the large office, which was packed with
people.
Thesis: When I was a child, Disney movies frightened me more than any other kind.
_____ As a five-year-old, I was terrified by the movie Pinocchio, about a puppet transformed into a
boy.
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_____ Although I saw Bambi when I was old enough to begin poking fun at “baby movies”, the scene
during which Bambi’s mother is killed has stayed with me to this day.
_____ About a year after Pinocchio, I gripped my seat in fear as the witches and goblins of Fantasia
flew across the screen.
Practice in Revising Sentences
Revising and editing sentences is an important step in effective writing.
Cross out the unbalanced part of each sentence. In the space provided, revise the unbalanced part so
that it matches the other item or items in the sentence. (4pts)
EXAMPLE: Cigarette smoking is expensive, disgusting, and a health risk. Unhealthy
To escape the stresses pf everyday life, I rely on watching television, reading books, and my kitchen.
The keys to improving grades are to take effective notes in class, to plan study time, and preparing
carefully for exams.
Correct each run-on and comma splice with EITHER (1) a period and a capital letter OR (2) a comma (if
needed) and but, for, so, and. Do not use the same method of correction twice. (4pts)
Our boss expects us to work four hours without a break, he wanders off to a vending machine at least
once an hour.
Our class wanted to do something for the earthquake victims, we sent a donation to the Red Cross.
The children in the next car were making faces at other drivers when I made a face back, they giggled.
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Early in life, Thomas Edison suffered with deafness he taught his wife-to-be Morse code while he was
courting her.
Underline the fragments in the items below. Then make changes to turn the fragments into sentences.
(4pts)
I have a few phobias. Such as fear of heights and fear of dogs. My nightmare is to be trapped. In a hotair balloon with three German shepherds.
I’ve decided to leave home. And rent an apartment. By being away from home and on my own. I will get
along better with my parents.
Write DM for dangling modifier or C for correct in the space provided for each sentence. (4pts)
_______ Boring and silly, I turned the TV show off.
_______ I turned off the boring and silly TV show.
_______ At the age of twelve, several colleges had already accepted the boy genius.
_______ At the age of twelve, the boy genius had already been accepted by several colleges.
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