Sexology
1
The sex techniques dissected in this book will
give your partner; back-arching, body-shaking,
screaming orgasms so powerful that they may
pass out afterwards.
Some side effects of this book includes:
• Having a partner who constantly looks at you like they
want to rip your clothes off.
• Other people becoming jealous of your relationship and
how your partner treats you.
• A guy who makes excuses to his buddies and cancels on
them so he can spend more time with you.
• A partner who can’t keep their hands off you.
2
Sexology
Chapter 1
Sexual Confidence Is Not Just About Sex
Being sexually confident is not just about being good at
sex. Instead, it’s about being comfortable with your body.
Researchers have done studies that showed the more
comfortable you are with your body, the more sexually
satisfied both you and your husband will be.
Focus on feeling comfortable, and don’t worry too much
about being sexy.
Sexology
3
When you focus on feeling comfortable, you’ll be natural,
relaxed, and confident…and your sex life will be effortlessly sexy.
But when you wear uncomfortable lingerie, dislike your
body and awkwardly talk dirty and try to deep throat him
even though you absolutely hate it, that’s not sexy. No
matter how your body looks at each moment, be comfortable in it while you work on or not work on a body you
desire. Being ashamed of your body will affect your confidence which will affect your sex life.
It is important you know being confident in your body and
delivering in bed and in life is more interesting than having a Kim Kardashian body and not delivering in your love
and sex life.
“Hey let’s talk about sex!”
It’s too easy to slip into a routine with your partner. Just
like with work, study, going to the gym or even eating, sex
is vital to a good relationship but it can become routine
and boring. When that happens, you and your partner will
start looking elsewhere for your thrills. Don’t let this happen to your relationship! Nothing kills a relationship faster than boredom.
4
Sexology
As sex is still quite a taboo subject, people tend not to get
deep into it. Respectfully discovering likes and dislikes
and compromises you are willing to make in your sex life is
less straightforward than talking about STIs, birth control,
or frequency of sex.
Sexual likes and dislikes can run on a spectrum. There are
activities that you love, ones you can’t even think about,
and all the stuff in between.
And what happens to things that you haven’t even heard
of yet? Or when your desires change?
Communicating such intimate needs requires a high level
of confidence and trust. At the same time, communication
builds that confidence and trust.
Think about what you would be comfortable with and
what things you would be uncomfortable with. Remember
you can always change your mind. Communicating these
things with your partner helps keep things open.
Talk to a healthcare provider if you’re worried something
you want to try could be physically or sexually dangerous.
Sexology
5
Sometimes we’re hampered by a lack of language. It’s
helpful to start from the perspective of pleasure and affection. Because two partners who are sexually involved
with one another ultimately want to pleasure each other.
Watching movies is a great way to facilitate sex conversations with your partner.
“For example; One way to have BDSM talk with your partner if you’d like to add a bit of BDSM in the bedroom or
to get awareness to your partner who has refused to give
you oral sex, is to watch a movie together that features it.”
Ask questions to get a sense of how your partner may
feel about it. You can ask; “Did you think that was hot?” or
“Would you ever try something like that?’”
Be open and curious in the conversation. Do not resort to
judgment or comparing them to your Ex.
If someone discloses that that they find something really
sexy that you find really icky, DON’T GO SAYING; “That’s
disgusting! Or “That’s unholy!” or “I will NEVER do that
with you. Don’t even think about it!”
6
Sexology
It’s perfectly fine not to go forward with anything you’re
uncomfortable with. Sex Expert Savage encourages intimate partners to be “GGG — good, giving, and game,” when
it comes to sharing and indulging each other’s turn-ons.
Where and when to talk about sex.
In addition to getting the words in the right order, many
relationship experts point out that where and when you
have intimate conversations is important.
Don’t talk sex when:
1.
They walk in the door.
2.
They’re hungry or tired.
3.
Before sex or after sex.
4.
When they are complaining or nagging about some thing.
Talking about sex after sex may come across as criticizing
or nit-picking. Talking beforehand might get you uptight
about delivering just exactly what your partner wants.
Respect and feeling respected are key aspects to a beautiful relationship. Using “I” statements is a communication
Sexology
7
technique that helps emphasize your experience, without
shaming, blaming, or complaining about the other person.
Some examples:
“I notice we seem to be having less foreplay before we
have sex. Can we talk about ways to spend more time
making out first?”
“I really liked it when you were on top of me. Is there anything I can do to get more of that?”
“I enjoy it a lot when you eat my pussy or when you go
down on me but your beards sometimes interferes with
the ecstatic pleasure of your beautiful mouth and tongue.
“
8
Sexology
Chapter2
Ways to Build up the sex anticipation before you tore each others clothes off.
One reason why sex can become dull and boring is because
there is no build up, no anticipation and no tension before
you have sex with your partner. It’s just a routine (for most
couples it’s usually either every morning or evening).
•
Sending racy texts.
If you are on vacation with friends or visit friends, text
your partner and let them know how much you are missing him (and how horny you are). Let them know what you
are planning to do with them when you return. Text it in
detail. You can build up a lot of sexual tension through
text when you are both apart so that when you come together, the passion will be through the roof.
Whatever you do, don’t bust out an X rated text in the
middle of a normal conversation as it won’t look natural.
Lead up to the X rated by starting with something more
subtle like “wish you were here”. This should then get the
conversation moving towards how much you want each
Sexology
9
other. You want him to reciprocate before starting a fully-fledged dirty talking text campaign. Once he has reciprocated, you can then start building up to the X rated
stuff. A lot of couples use emoji’s to further tell how they
are feeling with the most popular one being the wink face.
If they doesn’t respond to your wink-face text with their
own cheeky text, then they may not be in the mood. In this
case, it is advisable to discontinue progressing further.
This doesn’t only apply to when you are on vacation. You
can try texting right after you leave for work or school.
Caveat: Like with the other sex tips, try to use this one
sparingly otherwise it can get boring pretty quickly.
•
Dressing Up For him
Dressing up for your man is a simple ‘sex’ tip. In a way it’s
related to the last sex tip, “Building Anticipation’.
When we say “Dressing Up For Him”, we don’t necessarily mean dressing up in costume or wearing super slutty
clothes. We mean wearing something provocative. Something that will make him look twice. Something that reminds him of why he likes you so much(even if it has absolutely nothing to do with your body shape).
10
Sexology
This could be a dress that’s a little shorter than normal, a
top that’s cut low or anything that accentuates your good
points. Also dance or twerk for him if you can. If you are
good with pole dancing, you can have a dance pole in your
house and do a dance for him and also have him dance for
you(That’s if you married someone who is fun)
•
Whisper What You Want To Do To them
A good time to do this is if you are driving home from
somewhere and want to work up their appetite for sex so
you lean over and whisper in their ear “as soon as we get
home, I want you to…”. The more you go into details about
what it is you want them to do to you or what you want
to do to them, the more eager they will be and the more
electrifying excitement will be in the air.
This doesn’t just have to be in the car. It could be on a
plane, in the middle of a family dinner or at church if
you’re feeling really naughty. The best time to use this
tactic is when they can’t do anything at that moment, either because they are occupied or because you are with
other people. Knowing that you want them to do all these
naughty things but they have to wait will torture them…
but in a good way.
Sexology
11
Chapter 3
Foreplay comes first – Always.
This might seem like an obvious point, but I think it’s important to mention because some people try to have sex
straight away, without taking the time to get ready for it.
Whenever you are going to try and have sex, the first thing
you have to do is get down to foreplay. A lot of men get excited very quickly, and therefore think that they can jump
straight into having sex. For women, in general, it takes
a longer time to get physically prepared for penetration.
12
Sexology
If you are going to be riding your man, you need to make
sure that you are entirely wet, and he is fully hard, for it to
work properly.
Foreplay 1: Indulge in kissing. Hold their face or jaw or rub
through their hair or head(if bald) while passionately kissing them.
Foreplay 2: Gently lick and suck on their boobs. Oil up one
of your hand and be massaging their clitoris while kissing
their lips or sucking their boobs. Don’t forget to whisper
sweet words into both your ears while doing so. Pull or
massage their hair, even if it’s bald. Gently nimble on their
hand or their feet, telling them how beautiful they are and
how much you enjoy making love to them.
Foreplay 3: Get down on his dick and give it a good suck.
Make sure there’s lots of saliva involved or use an edible
lube. Dick sucking is more pleasurable to the guy when
the dick is wet and slimy. ( read more on how to give a
blow job in our blow job segment)
Foreplay 4: While giving her head, make sure to lick her
clitoris or clitorial area with the tip of your tongue. Suck
on it gently and not roughly and alternate between giving
Sexology
13
her head and massaging her clitoris. If she likes fingerings, gently push in one or two fingers with one hand while
working on the clitoris with the other. Not all ladies love to
be fingered, make sure to know if they like it before doing
it to avoid turning them off.
14
Sexology
Chapter 4
Blow Job Techniques
The people who know how to give a good blow job all do
the same few things. Treat this blow job techniques like
you would treat a recipe book. Don’t feel compelled to use
every suggestion, tip, technique, and position. Instead, be
flexible.
•
Use the blow job techniques that work for you and
your man to provide the most pleasure. And, forget about
Sexology
15
the blow job tips that don’t work. Some men respond better than others to different techniques.
•
Feel free to put your own spin on these techniques
and alter them to suit you.
•
Lastly, it’s totally fine if blow jobs aren’t your thing.
If you don’t like giving your man oral sex, don’t feel compelled to do it.
Effective communication will help you to quickly figure
out what techniques your man adores and which ones he
finds so-so.
•
Some guys love it when you deep throat them,
some don’t care for it at all.
•
Some guys love the idea of you swallowing their
load while others are turned off by it.
•
Some guys fantasize about giving you a facial(Cum-
ming all over your face) but others find it pointless.
•
Some guys may adore you fondling their testicles
during oral sex, while others will find it distracting.
The point is that your man is going to adore some of the
16
Sexology
techniques from this blow job tutorial while he isn’t going to get much from other techniques. The key is talking
to your man and learning his preferences. This way, you
can quickly figure out which techniques give him the most
pleasure.
What about you!
To be clear, communication isn’t just about accommodating his desires; it’s about yours too.
According to one study, up to half of all women between
16 and 25 have felt pressured into giving their man a blow
job. In another study, 12% of young adult women had repeatedly engaged in oral sex and other sexual practices
they disliked because their partner insisted on it. This isn’t
right or fair, and it certainly doesn’t make for a great relationship. If you aren’t comfortable with doing something,
then it’s important your man understands and respects
this.
With this in mind, here are a few quick tips on communicating effectively with your man so that you can give him
the best blow job of his life…
Getting feedback
Getting honest feedback on your blow job technique is vi-
Sexology
17
tal if you want to improve. The best time to get feedback
is right after his orgasm. At this time, he’ll be relaxed and
very thankful and more likely to be open about his desires
with you.
The other times that almost always work great is during
foreplay or after he’s had a few drinks.
What if your man is incredibly uptight, and won’t give you
helpful, direct feedback?
Here’s what to do:
The next time you go down on him, just beforehand, give
him a choice of two options:
“You have a choice: I can deep throat you till you cum, or
I can focus only on the tip of your cock. What would you
prefer? And you can’t choose both.”
Choking, gagging, and
throwing up
This is what happens when you combine a selfish guy together with a lack of boundaries.
If there is anything you don’t enjoy when giving your man
a blow job, he needs to know, and he needs to respect your
wishes. So if you don’t enjoy:
•
His hands on the back of your head, pulling you in
and out.
•
18
Deep throating.
Sexology
•
The taste of his semen.
•
Never-ending blow jobs.
You need to tell him, AND he needs to respect these
boundaries. Of course, if you do enjoy these things, then
you should let him know too.
What if he smells?
It’s not uncommon for guys to smell a little ripe after
working out or a hard day at work. If your guy hasn’t had
a shower recently, it might not be too pleasant when you
get down there. This is a communication issue!
If he likes bluntness, you might simply be able to say “Hey
babe, wanna hop in the shower before I go down on you?”
You may even suggest taking a shower together!
One thing that plays a part in a strong or unpleasant
odour is how close his genitals are to his anus. That’s true
for women, too! If he doesn’t have good hygiene there, it
can smell pretty horrible. You might purchase wet wipes
to use instead of toilet paper to keep each other fresher.
However, some guys really need to get in there and clean,
especially if they’re hairy.
This leads to our next point...
On the issue of hair
Genitals have hair. Yours do. His does. That’s how mam-
Sexology
19
mals are. But it doesn’t always make giving a blow job fun.
If his hair is getting in the way of you giving a blow job for
the first time or going down on your man as often as he’d
like, suggest that your man trim it. Trimming is less likely
to cause a cut than shaving, and he’ll still be more kempt.
If he wants to shave but struggles, offer to help him in the
shower.
This is also something that could lead to shower sex.
20
Sexology
Your Blow Job Compass
For most guys, their body will provide the best feedback
for you. When a guy is really enjoying himself, he will find
it hard to keep quiet or prevent his body from reacting to
the pleasure you’re giving him. So…
1)
Listen to his breathing: Does it shorten/quicken
or get heavier, meaning he’s enjoying himself? Or does it
remain unchanged?
2)
Listen to his voice: Along with his breathing, does
he start to moan, groan, or “Ahhhh” & “Ohhhh.” These are
some very obvious signs that what you’re doing is working. Calling out to God is also a great sign.
3)
Listen to his body: Does he remain perfectly still,
or can you see his body writhing with pleasure. Clenched
fists, curled toes, grabbing you, arching his back, tilting his
head back/lifting his chin up are all signs that you have
been thoroughly satisfying him.
The best part about listening to his body is that it never
lies.
The bottom line
So listen to what he says, learn what he prefers, make sure
he understands your boundaries and make dam well sure
you listen to his body if you want to learn how to give him
Sexology
21
the best blow job of his life.
Enthusiasm
Enthusiasm is by far the most powerful thing you can incorporate into your blow job skills AND sex life.
Have you ever been merely going through the motions
with a guy, where he seemed almost uninterested and unenthusiastic about getting it on? It’s a real turn off and
can make you feel very unsexy. On the other hand, have
you ever been with a guy who can’t keep his hands off you,
who looks at you like a lion eyeing his prey and when you
do get intimate with him, he kisses you with intense passion and makes love to you with his entire being. It’s like
he’s possessed and all he can think of is…you. It’s incredibly arousing. He’s acting with complete enthusiasm and
focus on you.
This is the power of enthusiasm.
When you give your boyfriend a blow job (or hand job or
have sex with him) while being completely enthusiastic
about it and totally focused on him, it’s going to massively arouse and turn him on. So even if you’re aren’t totally
sure about what you’re doing, just focus on being enthusiastic. You’ll be surprised at how much this enhances the
experience for your man. You don’t have to give a perfect
22
Sexology
blow job if you’re really enthusiastic and into it!
Here are two examples that should open your eyes to the
importance of enthusiasm when giving a guy a blow job.
1. Imagine that you have little experience of giving blow
jobs. You aren’t sure what to do, but you can’t wait to go
down on your man. When you get him alone, you push him
down on the bed, rip his pants off, and quickly take him
into your mouth. You’re using a simple up & down motion and nothing else, but he can hear your enthusiastic
slurping, see that you are enjoying yourself, and feel your
hands all over his body as you feel the pleasure you are
giving him. You are entirely lost in the moment and seem
joyfully fixated on making him cum.
2. Now imagine being very experienced and you agree to
give your man a blow job. First, you ask him to shower and
take out the trash. You then place a pillow on the floor to
protect your knees and take off your top, because your
priority is keeping it clean. You then start giving him a
blow job using multiple techniques, but you don’t make a
sound or seem enthusiastic at all. You stay on your knees
and barely move at all. You’re completely out of the mo-
Sexology
23
ment and are thinking about work emails.
Which is hotter? Scenario #1, obviously!
Felliato Foreplay.
It may be surprising to hear, but men love foreplay to be
drawn out significantly longer more than most women
think , even if most men get turned on quicker than most
women . So, while giving him a quickie BJ can be super hot
for both of you (like say sneaking away for a few minutes
at a party), you’ll find that a slow, teasing build-up is going
to result in your man blowing a bigger load and a bigger
smile on his face. This is probably the most powerful, but
also the most overlooked blow job tip you can learn. With
this in mind, here are a bunch of great “fellatio foreplay”
tips that you can use before giving your man head:
Hand Massage – This one is probably the easiest to get
right. While you are kissing him or just talking to him or
while you’re just physically close to him, put your hand on
his crotch. So your hand should be resting on his briefs
or his trousers. To make it smooth, start by first placing
your hand on his leg and moving it up from there. Then
just softly start massaging his penis and testicles outside
of his trousers/briefs.( Use a Lubricant to avoid friction)
24
Sexology
It’s as simple as softly running your hands over this area,
but you can also get a little more aggressive by softly
grabbing and squeezing his cock and balls and then releasing the pressure. After massaging him for a few minutes, help him take off his trousers and briefs. Then just
keep doing what you were doing, running your hands over
his manhood. If you like, you can also softly trace your fingers up and down his dick and around his balls.
Talking To Him On Your Knees – Another great blow job
idea to build up to giving your man head is talking to him
while on your knees. You can start off with something simple like, “So what do you want me to do now, baby?” while
holding his penis in your hands…you can be sure that he’s
going to ask you to give him a blow job. He might even
give you a tip for a great blow job that lets you know how
he likes it! As you become more confident and see his enthusiasm, you can start expanding your dirty talking, by:
1) Telling him how much you are enjoying giving him oral
sex.
2) That you can’t wait to taste his cum.
3) How giving him a blow job turns you on.
Sexology
25
So Close
Another blow job tip you can do to build up to your blow
job is to work around his manhood first. So instead of just
taking him into your mouth and giving him a blow job, you
could:
1)
Kiss around his crotch and groin.
2)
Gently massage his balls using your tongue.
3)
Softly “tickle” his testicles with the tips of your fin-
gers.
4)
Run your nails over his ass cheeks.
The Kiss Trail
A red hot blow job tip that allows you to move smoothly
from kissing your husband to taking him in your mouth is
to work slowly down from his lips to his penis by kissing
your way down. So you can move from his lips to his neck
to his chest to his stomach until you reach his groin area.
Of course, this works way better if he is naked. Along the
way, you can pay attention to his most sensitive spots. His
body reaction to your kisses will let you know his sensitive
spots.
26
Sexology
Should You Start Fast or
Slow
It can be incredibly hot to rip your man’s pants off, and
immediately take his penis in your mouth, working furiously to bring him to orgasm without much build up at all.
Sometimes we don’t have time for foreplay or may even
risk getting caught. That’s one reason why people love
quickies!
On the other hand, it can also be super satisfying to tease
him and slowly work up to your blow job, making your man
squirm and beg you to hurry up as you spend minute after
minute grazing and barely touching his penis before you
finally take him into your mouth.
Sexology
27
Chapter 4
Tips for a Good Blow Job
You’re both ready for the main event, now what do you
do?
Flick The Frenulum
For many men, the most sensitive spot on their penis is
their frenulum. The frenulum is the underside of the tip of
their penis, where the glans joins his shaft.
An intensely pleasurable blow job tip that you can use on
him is to use the tip of your tongue to apply a gentle flick-
28
Sexology
ing motion to it. While you are naturally going to stimulate
his frenulum while sucking him or just licking his penis.
Flicking his frenulum can be the perfect way to start off
your blow jobs before taking his entire dick in your mouth.
You can flick it up-and-down, side-to-side, in circles, or by
doing a combination of all three.
Bear in mind that if your man has been circumcised, there
is a chance that his frenulum has been removed.
Blowing Him
Many women are so anxious at the thought of giving head
to their man that they just get straight to it with little or
no build up and with no teasing. It’s like they are focused
only on making him ejaculate and getting that sperm out
of him.
Gently teasing your man and building up the sexual tension, so that he is practically begging you to blow him is
vital if you want to take your blow jobs from good to great.
Another great way to amp up the sexual tension and have
him squirming in delight is to lick him gently, making sure
to use lots of saliva and then blow on the wet patch you’ve
created. Blowing on the wet patch creates a cooling sensation that is great for teasing your man and making him
moan with pleasure
Sexology
29
Kiss around the Dick.
Another great way to start off your blow job is by kissing
his cock all over. Kissing is great if you like taking things
slowly and teasing your man.
You can kiss his penis any way you want, but it will be a lot
easier when you use your hand to hold it in place while you
kiss it. There are multiple different ways to kiss his penis,
from giving him small, quick ‘pecks,’ to giving him longer,
more intense kisses. He’ll especially love it if you give him
extra wet, sloppy kisses. Don’t be surprised if you can see
precum or semen dripping from his cock at this stage.
Kissing him is a fabulous way to pull back if you feel him
getting close to climaxing and want him to wait a little longer before reaching orgasm. It will also give your jaw a rest
if you find it getting tired from having him in your mouth.
Teeth is a huge turn off
You already know how sensitive your boyfriend’s penis
is, especially the underside of the head. For pleasuring it,
this is obviously a good thing. but if you apply too much
pressure, or you are too rough with it, then you’re going
to hurt your man.
Just imagine how sore it would be if your boyfriend had
nails that were constantly catching on you or worse. Can
you imagine how painful it would be if he started using
30
Sexology
his teeth on you as he was licking you out and performing
cunnilingus. It would be agony!
The only mandatory blow job tip when giving your man
oral sex is that you absolutely must not use your teeth
on him. It can completely ruin an otherwise fantastic BJ.
But what if he is particularly well endowed…or you have a
small mouth?
In situations like this, it can be almost impossible to avoid
using your teeth as you take him into your mouth. The
first thing you can do is to wrap your lips around your
teeth so that your lips act as a soft barrier. The second
thing is focusing on techniques where you don’t take him
into your mouth fully or by giving him a handjob.
Do not let him push all his dick into your mouth and start
fucking your mouth. The trick you need to use to prevent
him from triggering your gag reflex is to START your blow
job by placing a hand by the base of his penis, so you can
control how deep you take him. If he is particularly well
endowed, then you can wrap a few fingers around the base
so that you can only take a small section of his penis into
your mouth.
Sexology
31
BJ Techniques When He’s Not Circumcised
The difference is that uncut guys have extra foreskin, also
known as the prepuce, which partially or completely covers the glans. Uncut guys also have more frenulum along
the underside of their glans.
Pull it back – The foreskin gets tighter when a man is
erect, but the tightness varies, so you’ll need to get used
to his foreskin when blowing him. Some foreskin is pretty tight when the guy is hard, so there’s not much wiggle
room there.
But not too much – This might seem confusing, but pulling
the foreskin all the way back can be quite uncomfortable
for some guys. So you don’t need to push it as far back as
it can go, just enough to expose at least part of the head. A
guy won’t feel much if you’re stimulating him through his
foreskin, so you need to pull it back to have direct access
to the head of his penis.
Switch it up – Pulling back the foreskin means you can
focus on just the tip of his penis but this can become overwhelming for a guy who is uncut. According to research,
cut guys are less likely to ask their partner to be gentler on their penis they want more stimulation; although,
32
Sexology
women may not always notice a difference in sensitivity.
Remember that the foreskin causes an uncut guy’s glans
to be extra sensitive, so you may want to let the foreskin
move back into place from time to time.
Use the foreskin – You can actually stroke the foreskin
across his glans, which feels great for many uncut guys.
You can also use this time to give your mouth a break!
It’s also a good way to give him less stimulation and make
your blow job last longer.
Swirl your tongue – When you’re ready to take his penis
back into your mouth, keep the foreskin down over his penis and insert your tongue between the head of his cock
and foreskin. Give it a swirl or three. He’s sure to enjoy it!
Roll your tongue around as you push the foreskin back off
his glans.
Suck and squeeze, gently – If a guy is uncut, you can orally stimulate his foreskin as well as the glans and shaft. This
is a technique for a good blow job that will set you apart
from other women who may not be sure how to go down
on an uncut cock. Suckle and squeeze your lips around his
foreskin. Start gently and SLOWLY increase the intensity.
Remember that each guy has his own preference for how
Sexology
33
much pressure and foreskin attention he likes, which is
why it’s essential for you to talk to him about what he likes.
Then you are going to suck on it gently. Sucking on it will
cause your lips and the inside of your mouth to press softly against his shaft and the head of his cock, stimulating
the length of it. While doing this, you can take his penis in
and out of your mouth, allowing you to pleasure it entirely.
While sucking him, you can add some variation by using
your tongue to massage his penis too. There isn’t anything
more to this technique other than simply sucking and taking his penis in and out of your mouth
....................................................
Jerk & Suck
Jerking your man off while giving him a handjob at the
same time is a super way to maximize his pleasure. Simply
take the first inch or two of his penis into your mouth and
then wrap one hand around his shaft. Run your hand up
and down his shaft at the same time while sucking the tip
of his dick.
34
Sexology
Work his balls.
Speaking of working your man’s testicles…using your
mouth to stimulate them is an excellent blow job technique that adds even more pleasure to his experience.
Whatever you can do to his penis with your mouth, you
can do to his balls. The only significant difference is that
your man’s testicles are super sensitive to pain, so make
sure you don’t apply too much pressure or worse accidentally use your teeth on him.
1) Kiss His Balls – An easy way to see if your man enjoys
you playing with his balls is to start by gently kissing them.
Just purse your lips together and give them a few soft, wet
kisses.
Sexology
35
2)Lick His Balls – Once you can see how much he enjoys
you kissing his balls, take it up a notch by gently licking
and massaging them with your tongue. Keeping your
tongue flat so that it covers as much of his testicles as
possible is best.
3) Suck His Balls – A more intense way to massage his
balls with your mouth is to gently take them into your
mouth and softly massage them with your tongue. Remember, the keyword here is SOFTLY. You’ll also find that
the more saliva you use, the silkier it feels for your man.
Edible lubricant works great here too.
So you can kiss them, lick them and even suck them. A
powerful technique is gently taking one of his balls into
your mouth and then softly licking and sucking on it.
Remember that different guys have different preferences. So while some guys adore having their balls stimulated, a small percentage of guys don’t enjoy it much at
all. Don’t worry about this as it’s just your man’s personal preference. If your husband or boyfriend does enjoy it,
then you’ll find that it’s much easier for you to pleasure his
balls if he trims his hair down there.
36
Sexology
How to make him NOT cum in
seconds
If your man cums easily and quickly, then there are two
simple techniques you can use to prolong his blowjob and
pleasure.
1. Focus on the methods that don’t make him lose control and cum – This may seem obvious, but many women
often forget about this. The tip of your man’s penis is the
most sensitive, so avoid stimulating the tip if you want him
to last longer. Instead, focus on his shaft, balls, perineum,
and kissing around his thighs.
2. Light as a feather – Use a minimum amount of pressure
when stimulating him if you don’t want him to cum quickly.
So, when you take his penis into your mouth, he should
barely feel it.
3. Take a break – Take a moment to caress his body with
your hands, kiss up his tummy to suck on his nipples, or
even kiss your man if he doesn’t want to come just yet.
Sexology
37
Chapter 5
How to give her head.
For many women, orgasming is physical and mental; they
need to feel relaxed and in the mood. Don’t just go barging in down there. Take your time, and make sure you are
both feeling turned on before you venture south. If you
aren’t used to giving head, don’t expect to bring her to a
climax in seconds flat. And if you have bad stubble on your
chin, forget it; no girl wants razor burns in such a sensitive
place.
•
Ask what she likes
You don’t necessarily have to go down on her for several
hours – just a few minutes of oral sex can do wonders for
your foreplay. Ask her what feels good and if there’s any-
38
Sexology
thing that would make it better. Make sure you are both
in a comfortable position, or you’ll end up with an unsexy
crick in your neck.
•
No magic formulas
Every female is different. There is no point in rigidly following those ‘Ten Easy Steps to Give Her an Oral Orgasm’
articles in lads’ mags. It isn’t like an exam, with right and
wrong answers. Sometimes you have to experiment to see
what works for both of you.
•
Start gently
Many women say that oral sex gives them more stimulation than penetration. So remember to take it easy and
avoid being rough, especially to begin with. Look where
you are going too. Gently part the outer lips of the vagina
and look for the vaginal opening, and the hooded clitoris
above it. These are the most pleasurable areas to stimulate, and are the key to giving the best head. Thrusting
a tongue in and out of the vagina might feel good for a
moment or two, but it won’t be enough to tip her over the
edge.
•
Work it
Try kissing and licking anywhere between her thighs to
turn her on. Move on to the clitoris, starting with gentle
Sexology
39
licking or sucking. Get her to tell you what motion feels
the best, what speed and what pressure turn her on the
most. Try it with a relaxed, soft tongue, and change to a
firmer, pointed tongue. Some women love an up-anddown licking motion, others like it to go from side to side
(like a windscreen wiper), and others still like a circular or
pressing-down motion.
•
Patience, patience
When you have found something that works well, keep on
doing it! Take a break if you need one, but avoid stopping
suddenly because it can be very frustrating for the woman. Ask if she wants you to use your fingers as well. If she
says ‘yes’, make sure they are wet before you start moving
them around on her clit or inside her.
What to do before going
down on her.
1. Try breast/nipple play.
The breasts and nipples are very sensitive, and beginning
by lighting stroking, circling, or licking the nipples, or gently cupping the breasts, can really turn your partner on.
40
Sexology
2. Nibble and/or lick the inner thigh.
As you begin heading down, build up the anticipation by
nibbling or licking their inner thigh, Richmond recommends. Feel free to explore other areas with your mouth
or hands as well, like the neck,and stomach.
3. Keep the underwear on.
Stroke the vulva or clit with underwear still on. Again,
you’re building anticipation—you could even pull their underwear to the side when you’re ready for contact.
4.Use your breath and tongue.
Try running your tongue up and down with underwear still
on, or using your breath to warm up the whole area.
Sexology
41
For clitoral stimulation.
“The clitoris is queen”, Always and forever. Never forget it.
When in doubt, keep your focus there, and listen to your
partner as they respond to the types of clitoral stimulation.
1)
Dance around it with the tongue.
Starting off, it’s a good idea to go slow. Dance around the
clit with your tongue, or lightly graze it to start building
sensation.
2)
Lick it up and down or side to side.
Listen to and feel your partner respond as you lick their
clit either up and down or side to side. You should be able
to tell which they prefer, and it never hurts to ask if they
like it!
3)
Try sucking on it.
Some like this and some don’t, but you can try lightly
sucking on the clit between strokes if they’re into it.
4)
Move your tongue in a figure-8 motion.
Along with up and down, and side to side, Engle says a figure-8, or infinity, motion can also work well.
42
Sexology
5)
Stay consistent.
If your partner is clearly enjoying what you’re doing, stay
consistent as far as the movement and rhythm. Constantly switching up techniques or speeds can make it harder
for them to settle into the sensation.
For extra stimulation.
Plenty of people are just fine with solely clitoral stimulation while receiving, but others may prefer extra stimulation such as penetration.
•
Kiss or lick the labia.
Don’t forget about the lips! The labia (both the inner and
outer sets) are sensitive too, and stimulating that area can
offer a more all-encompassing sensation.
Sexology
43
•
Spread the labia.
To really expose the clit, don’t be shy—spread the labia
apart and your partner will feel everything a lot more intensely.
•
Grab a breast.
Again, breasts and nipples are super sensitive—some folks
orgasm from nipple play alone. With a free hand, reach up
and grab their breast and/or rub their nipple as you’re going down on them.
•
Try putting a finger or two in.
If your partner likes to be penetrated during oral (some
don’t, so ask!), you can use one or two fingers to penetrate
the vagina. Just don’t smash them inside willy-nilly. Lightly stroke the G-spot with your fingers in a curling motion
while licking their clit.
•
See if they like tongue penetration.
Some people enjoy penetration from the tongue when
getting head, but it doesn’t offer as much stimulation as
licking the clit, for example. See how they respond, and
if they like it, alternate between the clit and vagina with
your tongue.
44
Sexology
Chapter 6
Sex Dirty Talks
Do you want to talk dirty to a guy without sounding silly?
Perhaps you’ve seen women do it in a porn movie, but
don’t feel like you can speak as alluringly as them?
We have all watched Sex And The City and seen Carrie,
Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte talk dirty and so it in a
masterful way. It is time you learnt the same too. You will
be happy to know that talking dirty isn’t really that hard to
do and most of it just means you getting over your fears of
looking and sounding silly.
One of the biggest things that stop women from talking
dirty to their men is because they quite simply don’t know
what to say. I bet you have heard how talking dirty to your
man will make sex feel a lot sexier but do you know exactly
what dirty talking is?
Dirty talking isn’t just for movies and TV programmes, you
can do it too. Whatever you like to call it; dirty talk, sexy
talk, naughty talk or filthy talk, it is talk used to sexually
arouse your partner and buildup sexual tension. The goal
Sexology
45
of dirty talking is to drive your man wild through the use
of words and imagination to really heighten his sense and
increase the pleasure of sex.
The power of words and how you say those words work to
heighten each of his senses and will drive him to perform
at his best. Couples and lovers use dirty talking mostly
during sex when they can tell each other what they want
while in the heat of the moment. However dirty talk can
also be used prior to sex to build sexual tension which will
then explode once your man gets you in the bedroom...or
whatever room.
If you master the art of dirty talk, your man will go crazy
for you and you will both enjoy a more pleasurable and
exciting sex life. Now you know what dirty talking is, I’m
going to go through why you should dirty talk, how to tell
whether your guy likes it, some tips on how to dirty talk
and some dirty talking lines to help you get started.
Why talk dirty to your Partner?
Talking dirty to your partner doesn’t just have the sole
purpose of making them feel aroused. One of the main
benefits is that it keeps them thinking of you and keeps
them interested in you; especially if you indulge in role
46
Sexology
play. By using different dirty talking lines and scenarios, it
will keep them on their toes and will have them constantly
thinking about what you said and how you made them felt.
Having this level of interest will keep them attracted to
you.
The other, more obvious, benefit is that you talking dirty
to them will make them feel hot, sexy and aroused. As well
as that, it will also make them feel desired and wanted
which is important in a relationship especially to men. As
men can sometimes feel needed which isn’t an attractive
factor in a relationship.
You will also get benefits out of talking dirty; hotter, sexier
and more enjoyable sex.
Sexual tension is the key to a steamy sex session and
there is no better way to build sexual tension that to start
talking dirty to get them in the mood. This is made even
better when you are in public when they cannot do anything about it, but as soon as you arrive home they can,
and the sex will be great after all that sexual tension you
built up.
Sexology
47
Does your Partner like talking dirty?
Before you dive straight into it and start writing down all
the naughty things you want to say to your partner, try
and find out whether this is actually something that would
arouse them. Not everyone are the same. Some will like
dirty talking and some will cringe and could possibly even
turn them off. Don’t let this scare you though and put you
off; you just need to test the waters a little before diving
right in.
To test the waters to see if they would enjoy dirty talking
in bed or before sex, the next time you’re lying in bed
together bring up the subject of when you first met and
more importantly… when you first had sex. Go into details
about how you felt when they first touched your intimate
areas and what you thought of them. If this arouses your
partner, and makes them want to ‘play’, you know that
dirty talking is probably something they will enjoy.
If your they join the conversation with you reminiscing
about memories then maybe dirty talking is not their thing
but don’t rule it out altogether. You can try other things
too such as talking about a raunchy and risqué moment
you had together and see if this arouses them.
Building Up to it
48
Sexology
First of all, consider your partner’s personality; how comfortable are they when you touch them? How do they react when you try and fool around? Are they conservative
or do they like trying new things? How do they react when
you swear? These are all questions you need to ask yourself. Some people hate it when you swear so saying things
like “fuck me” wouldn’t go down very well with them.
Another thing you can do to build up to it is touch them
more often. Couples can be very touchy in the bedroom
but hardly ever touch outside of the bedroom. If you’re
one of these couples then start increasing how much you
touch outside the bedroom. This could be holding hands
when out and about, sneaking in a quick hug in the supermarket, slapping them on the butt when they walk past
you in the house, or sit on their lap to ask a question or to
talk.
Sexology
49
50 sexy lines to use on
your partner
Remember though that it’s not what you say, it’s how you
say it that will turn them on so follow up each dirty line
with how you feel rather than just saying a bunch of random dirty lines.
1) You make me so wet or so hard
50
Sexology
2. Your biceps look so sexy or your ass looks so good baby
3. Goodness, it feels so big! Baby you are super tight i
want to cum
4. I love the way you feel inside me/I love the way I feel
inside you baby.
5. Oh don’t stop that!
6. This feels so good!
7. I don’t want to stop making love to you/ I don’t want you
to ever pull out.
8. Pick me up later. I want you to fondle me in the car!
9. I’m not wearing any underwear and I’m dripping.
10. I can’t wait for you to put it in me!
11. I want you right here, right now!
12. I had a wet dream about you last night. You fucked me
so good I was shaking.
Sexology
51
13. You have such a dirty mind… which I like
14. Where do you want me to touch first me first/Tell me
what you are about to do to me baby
15. I want you to tear my clothes off me right now!
16. I’m not horny all the time, it’s just that you’re so fucking sexy!
17. I love how your tongue feels down there
18. You’re such a sex machine and I love it
19. I’ve been thinking long and hard about what I’m going
to do to you tonight…
20. Show me where you want me to kiss you
21. You’re such a naughty boy/girl
22. Please take me now
23. Take me now – This is different to the line above were
you are pleading; this is demanding
52
Sexology
24. I want to have you in every room tonight
25. You make me think such dirty thoughts
26. I’ve been waiting for this all day…
27. Undress me…
28. Call me a bitch – (only use this if he is into using crude
words)
29. Just looking at you standing there in those boxers
make me wet…
30. Oh god! / Oh yeah!
31. Tie me up and ride me
32. I want you to take me while I’m leaning against the
window
33. You’re so big it hurts… but I still want it
34. Can you imagine doing this to me the very first time
we met
Sexology
53
35. Fuck me like I’m your bitch (again only use this if he is
into being crude)
36. You can have all of me, but you have to pay me first –
(this could be a bit of roleplay fun)
37. Get in deeper – (you can grab him by his butt at this
point and push him into you)
39. Punish me! I’ve been a really bad girl
40. Going down on you makes me so horny
41. Talk into my ears while you’re taking me
42. The sheets are so wet with my cum right now
43. You really know how to make a girl wet… – (this is a
great way to massage his ego)
44. I love how hard you get when I stroke you
45. You make me feel so slippery between my thighs when
54
Sexology
you do that…
46. I like it when you do it like that
47. Pull my hair and take me now
48. I want you to cum all over my face
49. You make me feel like such a whore
50. Just watching you makes me want to touch myself
Lines To Avoid Saying
As well as knowing what’s
good to say to your partner
when dirty talking, it is also good to know what lines not
to use. Here are some of the lines to avoid when dirty
talking:
1. “More, more, more” – He’s already doing his best so
don’t ask for more when he can’t.
2. “Is that all you got, big boy?” – This can damage his ego
so best to leave this one out of your dirty talking vocabu-
Sexology
55
lary.
3. “Screaming” – You are not in a nudie movie and screaming isn’t really the most pleasurable of sounds when making love.(unless you legit feel like screaming)
4. “Fuck me…” – If you are already doing the dirty then
what more can he do!?
5. “Harder…” – This is the same as the first one; if he’s already doing his best then don’t ask for what he can’t give.
6. “Say something dirty to me / Call me a bitch” – Don’t
ask him to talk dirty. If you want to start dirty talking then
just say something dirty and he will reciprocate.
How you say it matters..
Most of the time it’s not actually what you say that turns
your partner on, it’s how you say it. Whatever dirty thing
you have on your mind that you want to tell your partner,
make sure you breathlessly whisper it in his ear or gently
say it to them not screaming it. Dirty talk will only become
dirty talk if you are confident in what you are saying and
have a seductive manner.
56
Sexology
Whatever you do, don’t start giggling or acting super cute
when saying it as it no longer becomes dirty talk but more
of a joke and laughing matter. If you want to seduce your
partner with dirty talk then act dirty and seductive and
not cute and funny . There is no harm in being cute and
funny but there is a time and place for it and dirty talking
isn’t the time and place.
To be even more persuasive when whispering dirty talks,
you can also gently nibble on their ear in between words.
This works like a charm and will soon have them ravish
you just like you had hoped they would.
Avoid Trash talking
Trash talk can be one of those things you should avoid
doing unless you and your partner specifically like it. This
also goes for other vocals other than words such as your
actions and motions during sex.
I’m sure you have watched a nude movie by now and have
seen the exaggerated facial expression and moans the
women make during sex. While this may work in the movie, it doesn’t exactly work in real life so don’t assume that
Sexology
57
acting like a porn star will impress your man and make him
aroused. It could actually be a major turn off for him.
If during sex you are making very strange facial expressions or are screaming with pleasure but he hasn’t even
hardly touched you yet, he is going to know you are faking. If he knows you are faking then you will damage his
ego as he may think that you are faking to hide that he
can’t pleasure when it isn’t true. All you need to do to let
him know that what he is doing is pleasuring you is make
soft gentle gasps and moans.
When to use crude words.
Dirty talk should make you blush or feel naughty but it
should never offend you which are what crude words can
do. If you’re comfortable in using crude words prior or
during sex then before you go full force into it, you need
to make sure that your partner is also comfortable and
enjoys using crude words such as “bitch” or “dog” otherwise you could turn them off or completely offend them.
To test whether they take pleasure from crude words, use
it the next time you dirty talks and watch their reaction
58
Sexology
closely. If they reciprocate and call you something crude
then you know they are comfortable and enjoys it equally
as much as you do. If however they are surprised at what
you said or doesn’t say anything at all, they may not be
as comfortable with it. On this situation, you should stop
using crude words when talking dirty.
It is known that aggression and arguments can lead to
passionate lovemaking which is why everyone is familiar
with “make-up sex”. Using crude words can have the same
effect as this which is why some couple take pleasure in
it but it is certainly not for everyone. Most people want
to feel loved when making love which is why using crude
words when talking dirty isn’t for everyone.
Don’t use words, use moan.
Sometimes words don’t even have to be said in order to
talk dirty. Being vocal, by moaning while making love, will
be a massive turn on for your partner. If they know you are
enjoying it, they will enjoy it. If you’re silent, they won’t
know what you’re thinking or whether you are enjoying it
which will make them over think and under perform. Massage his ego a little bit but don’t go as far as to moan so
loudly and ridiculously that you’re putting it on as this will
also make him think that you aren’t enjoying it.
Sexology
59
Men perform best in bed when they are confident so to get
the best out of your man, it’s time to stop being silent and
start vocalizing your pleasure. If you aren’t getting pleasure from your man then tell him what you like without
damaging his ego. You can do this by moving his hand to
where you want it to go and move his hand in the motion
you want it to go in. You can also take charge sometimes
to show the positions you like to be in.
Men want to know that they are the best you have ever
had in bed and by gasping and moaning while making love
will show him that he is.
Indulge in Role Play.
One of the best ways to feel comfortable about talking
dirty is through role play. Find out what scenario arouses
your partner and get to work on setting the fantasy in motion. This could be something like acting out a one night
stand. Usually with one night stands, things happen fast
and a lot of passion is involved. You can act out this scenario by pretending you and your partner are having a one
night stand.
60
Sexology
As you are acting out this scenario, talk them through it
by telling them what you are going to do to them and what
you want them to do to you.
By pretending your man is the hot stranger who you’re
about to have a one night stand with, you can indulge in
this fantasy and say all those naughty things out loud
rather than keeping them to yourself. Doing this will make
the sex great and your orgasms even greater still. Whatever you want to role play, make sure to throw yourself
into it 100% to get the full feel of the fantasy.
Sexology
61
Chapter 8
Sex Positions.
Anytime you introduce something fresh and novel into
the bedroom, you set yourself up for a more stimulating
experience and bigger finish, It can also work wonders for
your relationship. One significant challenge to intimacy is
the loss of novelty in the bedroom. New sex positions will
encourage you and your partner to be more vulnerable
with one another in the bedroom and otherwise. And in
the end, you’ll find your relationship injected with an extra
dose of trust. In some cases, switching up positions might
even be a must. “If you’re thinking ‘ouch’ when the offer of
sex is put on the table, you could definitely benefit from
exploring diverse positions that are more comfortable for
folks with diverse abilities, as well as those with chronic
pain, or pain from penetration,” ( check good positions if
you experience painful sex in Chapter 9)
How about with any of these 39 orgasm-inducing positions that’ll blow you and your partner’s minds.
62
Sexology
1. Corkscrew
Do It: Near the edge of a bed or bench, rest on your hip
and forearm and press your thighs together. Your partner
stands and straddles you, entering or grinding from behind.
Why: Keeping your legs pressed together during this sex
position allows for a tighter hold on your partner as they
thrust.
Make It Hotter: Instead of letting your partner do all the
work, try thrusting your hips slightly to match the tempo.
Sexology
63
2. Face Off
Do It: Your partner sits on a chair or the edge of the bed;
you face them, seated on their lap.
Why: During this sex position, you’re in control of the angle and depth of the entry and thrust. Being seated adds
support, so it’s great for marathon sex sessions.
Make It Hotter: Let your fingers (and hands) do the talking.
Once seated, you can put your hands anywhere on your
body or your partner’s to make things more interesting.
You can even hold your breath.
64
Sexology
3. Doggy style.
Do It: Your partner sits on a chair or the edge of the bed;
you face them, seated on their lap.
Why: During this sex position, you’re in control of the angle and depth of the entry and thrust. Being seated adds
support, so it’s great for marathon sex sessions.
Make It Hotter: Let your fingers (and hands) do the talking.
Once seated, you can put your hands anywhere on your
body or your partner’s to make things more interesting.
Sexology
65
4. Pretzel dip
Do It: Lie on your right side; your partner kneels, straddling your right leg and curling your left leg around their
left side.
Why: With this sex position, you get the deeper penetration of doggy style while still being able to make that important eye contact. Or, if penetration isn’t your thing,
your partner can easily grind against up against you stimulating your clit.
Make It Hotter: Get your partner to rub your clit. Because,
duh.
66
Sexology
5. Flatiron
Do It: Lie facedown on the bed, legs straight, hips slightly
raised.
Why: This sex position creates a snug fit, so your partner’s
penis or strap-on will seem even larger.
Make It Hotter: Some shallow thrusts and deep breathing
will help the romp last longer.
Sexology
67
6. G-whiz
Do It: Lie back with your legs resting on each of your partner’s shoulders.
Why: This sex position is awesome because when you raise
your legs, it narrows the vagina and helps target your
G-spot.
Make It Hotter: Ask your partner to start rocking you in
a side-to-side or up-and-down motion. That should bring
the penis or strap-on into direct contact with your G-spot.
68
Sexology
7. Cow girl’s helper.
Do It: Similar to the popular Cowgirl sex position, you
kneel on top, pushing off your partner’s chest and sliding
up and down the thighs. But your partner helps by supporting some of your weight and grabbing your hips or
thighs while they rise to meet each thrust.
Why: This sex position puts less stress on your legs, making
climaxing easier. Plus, if you’re with a guy, female-dominant sex positions delay his climax—so everyone wins.
Make It Hotter: Alternate between shallow and deep
thrusting to stimulate different parts of the vagina.
Sexology
69
8. Wheelbarrow
Do It: Get on your hands and feet and have them pick you
up by the pelvis. Then grip their waist with your thighs.
Why: Aside from being a fabulous arm workout, this
male-dominant sex position allows for deeper penetration.
Make It Hotter: Try resting on a table or the side of the bed
and give your arms a break.
70
Sexology
9. Leap Frog
Do It: This is a modified doggy-style. Get on your hands
and knees, then, keeping hips raised, rest your head and
arms on the bed.
Why: This sex position creates deeper penetration—and
gives you a chance to rest on a pillow.
Make It Hotter: Use your hands to stimulate your clitoris.
Sexology
71
10. Stand and deliver.
Do It: With both of you standing, you bend over at the
waist; they enter you from behind.
Why: Bending over during this sex position helps make
the vaginal walls tighter and increases the intensity of the
friction.
Make It Hotter: Have your partner tickle your clitoris with
a free hand, or loosely tie your hands together with a silky
scarf.
72
Sexology
11. Magic mountain
Do It: Your partner sits, legs bent, leaning back on their
hands and forearms. You do the same and then inch toward them until you make contact.
Why: You’ll both feel really connected looking at each
other. Increase your stimulation by grinding your clitoris
against their pelvis.
Make It Hotter: Slide ice cubes down their chest and let
the cold water collect at the base of their pelvis.
Sexology
73
12. Cowgirl
Do It: You kneel on top, pushing off your partner’s chest
and sliding up and down their thighs. You can relieve some
of your weight from their pelvis by leaning back and supporting yourself on their thighs.
Why: By being the dominant in this sex position, you’ll delay their climax and intensify yours.
Make It Hotter: Discover new sensations for both of you
by widening your knees or bringing them closer to their
body.
74
Sexology
13. Reverse cowgirl
Do It: Your partner lies on their back; you straddle them,
facing their feet.
Why: This position lets you take control and show your
partner the pace and rhythm you like.
Make It Hotter: To get more leverage, put your knees and
shins inside their legs and under their thighs.
Sexology
75
14. Cowboy
Do It: You lie on your back while your partner straddles
you. They then gently inserts their penis, strap-on, or
finger through the tight opening created by your semiclosed legs.
Why: Tightness increases the intensity of the penetration.
Make It Hotter: Have them fondle your breasts or gently
hold down your wrists for a little bondage action.
76
Sexology
15. Ballet dancer
Do It: Standing on one foot, face your partner and wrap
your other leg around their waist while they help support
you.
Why: This sex position allows for quality face time and
connecting.
Make It Hotter: If you’re really flexible, try putting the
raised leg on their shoulder for even deeper penetration
or clitoral stimulation during outercourse.
Sexology
77
16. Missionary
Do It: Do I really need to spell this one out? Okay. Lie on
your back while they lie facedown on top of you.
Why: This sex position is simple, elegant, effective, and
surprisingly versatile. Vanilla, sure, but delicious.
Make It Hotter: You can drastically change the sensation
for both of you by shifting the angle of your legs.
78
Sexology
17. Cross-booty
Do It: Your partner enters you from the missionary position, then slides their chest and legs off your body so their
pelvis is in the same location but their limbs form an “X”
with yours.
Why: You feel more of your partner’s body in motion with
this sex position.
Make It Hotter: Use this unique angle to massage their
back, butt, or legs as they thrust. They’ll go crazy (as will
you, watching them).
Sexology
79
18. The Caboose
Do It: While they sit on the bed or a chair, back yourself
into their lap and spoon each other while seated.
Why: You can’t see your partner during this sex position,
which means fantasizing is easier and can add to the excitement.
Make It Hotter: Tighten the muscles of your pelvic floor
so you can grip them and keep them hard AF or stimulate
their clitoris.
80
Sexology
19. Scoop me Up
Do It: Both of you lie on your sides, facing the same direction. You bring your knees up slightly while your partner
slides up behind your pelvis and enters you from behind.
(You may also know this as spooning.)
Why: This sex position allows for more skin-to-skin contact, increasing your stimulation.
Make It Hotter: Have your partner place their hands on
your shoulders to increase the intensity and deepness of
the thrust.
Sexology
81
20. Reverse scoop
Do It: From the missionary position, without disengaging,
turn together onto your sides, using your arms to support
your upper bodies.
Why: You get the same full-body press and can gaze into
each other’s eyes.
Make It Hotter: Try intertwining your legs with his or fondling them down below.
82
Sexology
21. Golden Arch
Do It: Your partner sits with their legs straight and you sit
on top of them with bent knees on top of their thighs, and
you both lean back.
Why: This position gives you both nice views of each other’s full bodies. You’ll also have control over the depth,
speed, and angle of the thrusts.
Make It Hotter: Have them use their hand to rub your clitoris, or use your own. Lean back farther for extra G-spot
stimulation.
Sexology
83
22. The seashell
Do It: Your partner sits with their legs straight and you sit
on top of them with bent knees on top of their thighs, and
you both lean back.
Why: This position gives you both nice views of each other’s full bodies. You’ll also have control over the depth,
speed, and angle of the thrusts.
Make It Hotter: Have them use their hand to rub your clitoris, or use your own. Lean back farther for extra G-spot
stimulation.
84
Sexology
23. Butter churned
Do It: Lie on your back with your legs raised and folded
over so that your ankles are on either side of your head,
while they squat and dip their penis, strap-on, dildo, or finger in and out of your vagina.
Why: Aside from getting that eye contact, the extra rush of
blood into your head will increase the ecstasy.
Make It Hotter: Have them dribble chocolate syrup or
something sweet into your mouth (yes, really). It gets
more of your senses involved, amping up the entire experience.
Sexology
85
24. The chairman
Do It: Your partner sits on the edge of the bed and you sit
on them, facing away.
Why: This sex position will hit the spot…as in, your G-spot.
Meanwhile, you can use your hands to stimulate their
scrotum, perineum, or clitoris.
Make It Hotter: Bring your knees closer to your chest, supporting your feet on the bed.
86
Sexology
25. The Pinball Wizard
Do It: You get into a partial bridge position (like a pinball
machine), with your weight resting on your shoulders.
Your partner enters you from a kneeling position.
Why: It allows your partner easy access to stimulate your
clitoris and massage the mons pubis.
Make It Hotter: Throw one leg up against their shoulder
for deeper penetration.
Sexology
87
26. Valedictorian
Do It: From missionary position, you raise your legs and
extend them straight out (forming a “V”).
Why: This allows for good body contact with the vulva.
Make It Hotter: Try grabbing your ankles. It can give you
stability and an added stretch to boost the sensation.
88
Sexology
27. Spork
Do It: While you lie on your back, raise your right leg so
they can position their body between your legs at a 90-degree angle and enter you. Your legs will form the tines of a
spork (that’s a spoon-fork combo, ICYDK). You can do this
with them facing you or facing your back. Options!
Why: From the spork position, you can lift your top leg and
support it by resting it on your partner’s shoulder. From
here, you can easily stimulate your clitoris using your fingers while they’re inside you.
Make It Hotter: Synchronize your breathing. One of you
takes the lead and the other follows so that you inhale and
exhale together. The coordinated rhythm opens an unspoken dialogue of intimacy.
Sexology
89
28. Seated Wheelbarrow
Do It: Have your partner sit at the edge of a bed or chair
and position yourself so that your butt is in their lap, and
plant your hands firmly on the floor. Stretch your legs out
behind their waist (it’ll probably work better if they support your thighs) and pump away.
Why: This position allows for deep penetration—plus you’ll
work your arms while you’re at it.
Make It Hotter: Try rhythmically squeezing your pelvic
muscles, to help you both reach a strong climax.
90
Sexology
29. Table Top
Do It: You don’t have to do this one on a table—any surface
that hits your partner at crotch height will do. Have them
enter you while you’re sitting or lying at the edge of a table, counter, or maybe even your bed.
Why: This position is great for face-to-face action. Plus,
if you two are drastically different heights, this is a great
option, since it puts you both at the same height.
Make It Hotter: Try bringing your legs down and placing
your feet on their chest, in front of their shoulders. This
allows you to control the tempo and depth of thrusts.
Sexology
91
30. Champagne room
Do It: Your partner sits and you sit on top of them, facing
away.
Why: It helps you regulate the pace and intensity of the
thrusts.
Make It Hotter: Try doing it on the stairs or the edge of the
tub. Takes a bit of talent...but hey, practice makes perfect,
amirite?
92
Sexology
31. The Om
Do It: Your partner sits cross-legged (yoga/pretzel-style),
you sit in their lap facing them. Wrap your legs around
them and hug each other for support.
Why: Best for tantric sex. Rocking, not thrusting, is the key
when it comes to this very intimate position.
Make It Hotter: Lock into each other’s deep gaze to put
some extra “oh” into the big O.
Sexology
93
32. Upstanding Citizen
Do It: Your partner sits cross-legged (yoga/pretzel-style),
you sit in their lap facing them. Wrap your legs around
them and hug each other for support.
Why: Best for tantric sex. Rocking, not thrusting, is the key
when it comes to this very intimate position.
Make It Hotter: Lock into each other’s deep gaze to put
some extra “oh” into the big O.
94
Sexology
33. The Spider
Do It: Sit on the bed with legs toward one another, arms
back to support yourselves. Now move together and onto
their penis or strap-on. Your hips will be between their
spread legs, your knees bent, and feet outside of their hips
and flat on the bed. Now rock back and forth.
Why: You can still maintain eye contact while viewing the
action at center stage.
Make It Hotter: Grab your partner’s hands and pull yourself up into a squatting position while they lie back. Or
they can remain seated upright and pull you against their
chest into the Lazy Man position.
Sexology
95
34. The Good Ex.
Do It: Sit on the bed with legs toward one another, arms
back to support yourselves. Now move together and onto
their penis or strap-on. Your hips will be between their
spread legs, your knees bent, and feet outside of their hips
and flat on the bed. Now rock back and forth.
Why: You can still maintain eye contact while viewing the
action at center stage.
Make It Hotter: Grab your partner’s hands and pull yourself up into a squatting position while they lie back. Or
they can remain seated upright and pull you against their
chest into the Lazy Man position.
96
Sexology
35. The Lazy Man.
Do It: Place pillows behind your partner’s back and have
them sit on the bed with legs outstretched. Now straddle their waist, feet on the bed. Bend your knees to lower
yourself onto them, using one hand to direct the penis or
strap-on in. Just by pressing on the balls of your feet and
releasing, you can raise and lower yourself onto the shaft
as slowly or as quickly as you please.
Why: This position puts you in control, and maintains plenty of intimacy. Think of their penis or strap-on as a masturbatory tool, something to rub and stimulate your clitoris with and against.
Make It Hotter: From this position, you both can lie back
into the Spider position or its more challenging variation,
the Good Ex.
Sexology
97
36. Snow Angel
Do It: Lie on your back and have your partner straddle you
facing away. Lift your legs and wrap them around their
back to elevate your pelvis so they can enter you. Grab
their butt to help them slide up and back. Add a little massage action to your grip.
Why: You get a prime view of their cute butt. Plus, from this
position, you have easy access to fondle their testicles or
clitoris. Not to mention, their pelvis is perfectly positioned
to grind against your clit.
Make It Hotter: Have them spin around into missionary
style to face you while trying to stay inserted. Then switch
positions, this time with you on top and facing away.
98
Sexology
37. Wrapped lotus
Do It: Have your partner sit cross-legged and climb into
their lap, facing them, with your legs wrapped around their
back. Have your partner enter you and grind up against
their pelvis.
Why: This position allows for some major face-to-face intimacy. Plus there’s plenty of room for creativity in this position—like stimulating different erogenous zones on each
others’ upper bodies, like the head, neck, and face.
Make It Hotter: Ask them to lick your nipples and let their
hands roam. And roam...and roam. (You get the idea.)
Sexology
99
38. The Snake
Do It: Lie down on your stomach, and have your partner lie
down on top of you and slide in from behind.
Why: This position allows for super-deep penetration, and
a snug fit which can feel great for you and your partner.
Make It Hotter: You can reach back and wrap your hand
around the shaft to help control how deep they get or
change up the angle of your butt for the same effect.
100
Sexology
39. Woman Astrid.
Do It: This position is just like cowgirl, but with a twist.
Climb on top and have your partner enter you. Then, lean
back and place your hands on the bed for support, creating a 45-degree angle with your partner’s legs.
Why: This change in angle helps target your G-spot even
more, and gives you control over the speed and depth of
thrusts. Plus, your partner has easy access to your clitoris.
Make It Hotter: Give yourself a hand with the “V stroke”:
Make a V with the index and ring finger of one hand and
place the fingers on either side of your clitoris with their
penis in between. Push your fingers down in a rocking motion.
Sexology
101
Chapter 9
Positions for those that experience
painful sex.
If there’s a tiny part of you thinking “ouch” during sex,
then it’s time to revisit your bedroom strategy. Sex should
never be uncomfortable… except maybe in that hilariously awkward way.
Even if position A worked for your previous partner, your
new S.O. is going to be undeniably different. How their
personal taste aligns with yours will determine comfortable or painful sex. In fact, if one position wasn’t so hot
last time with partner C, it’s okay to try again with part-
102
Sexology
ner D. This time, just incorporate our enhanced-for-comfort-and-satisfaction sex positions below.
With these how-tos, we’ve kept clitoral stimulation (and
your pleasure) at the forefront. The only prep you need to
do — and this is true before every kind of penetration with
any partner — is communicate and lubricate! Vaginal lubrication helps significantly reduce friction and discomfort
(and it’s perfectly okay to use lube) and paves the way for
fulfilling sex.
With a sex-positive attitude, an open mind, lots of sexual communication, and enough lube, you’ll discover that
there are many ways to sex-plore and sex-periment with
your significant other. But before you go and try any new
positions, remember that the best type of sex is the type
where the exchange of feelings and desires are expressed
freely, and the pressure to perform is left for the sports
arena.
1) Sizzling missionary
Let go of any old memories of those innocent times when
somewhat rhythmic up and down was all you knew about
sex. Instead, create a new experience of the classic missionary. In place of widening your legs, have your part-
Sexology
103
ner’s legs straddle your body, permitting for mutual genital touching. This works great because it isn’t dependent
on size but on the connection you and your partner have.
2) Sitting on Pillow
Take your favorite pillow, and place it underneath your
pelvis for increased support. Bend your knees, bring your
pelvis upward, and spread your legs apart enough to allow
for thrusting. What’s fantastic about this position is that
it allows you to control the depth of penetration and promotes clitoral stimulation.
3) Riding into the sunset
Take control and get on top. This position is ideal for some
cozy times because it allows for intimate kissing and eye
gazing, and permits you to create the rhythm you most
enjoy. Not only will you be able to position your clitoris to
your liking and increase sexual pleasure, but you can also
rock your pelvis back and forth to create a comfortable
rhythm.
4) Lean into me.
Find a wall or table to lean against. Face each other and
choose who will hold each other’s butts, and hook their
leg around the other person’s leg for support. Stimulate
104
Sexology
each other, by rubbing your clitoris against your partner’s
genitals, and then create a comfortable rhythm whereby
you’re able to move your body closer or away.
5) Side cuddle
You can either face each other, or position yourself to permit entry from behind. If you’re facing your partner, you
can take reign of your sex toy or the penis shaft and create the angle and thrust you desire. In the rear entry position, use your buttocks to control the speed and have your
partner remain still, while you move at your own pace and
control the depth.
6) The duo
Pair your favorite position with self-pleasure by incorporating the way you like to feel good simultaneously. If
you’re used to self-stimulating your clitoris while lying
on your back, with or without a sex toy, then do just that
while inviting your partner to touch your breasts or kiss
you. Creating this duo sensation can be dynamite.
7) The rabbit
Who said that sex toys are only for solo play? Dust off your
favorite vibrator and show it to your partner. Plan to use
it next time by directly applying clitoral stimulation while
you experiment with different positions.
Sexology
105
Use the different vibration settings to increase your pleasure or tease one another. Try holding off on orgasming
until you’re unable to hold back. The most important
thing, overall, when adding a new sex toy, is that you both
communicate about anything and everything — especially
on what feels good to each other.
8) The boycott
If you’ve tried everything, and you’re still experiencing pain — especially with penetration — then it’s time to
boycott penetration for a little bit. To substitute, practice
sensate focus exercises. Keep the focus on cultivating
sensual touch, erotic massage, and pleasure instead of
performance.
To spice things up during this break, you could give 69 a
try. Simply, go on your back and have your significant other’s mouth face your genitals, while you find your mouth
to theirs. Take the time to enjoy exploring each other.
Question and answers on how to control the leg or keep
balance while riding a dick.
Reddit user: “I have a lot of trouble riding dick (the socalled “cowgirl” position), physically. My legs won’t do it.
106
Sexology
I’m too weak. I especially can’t gain momentum when I’m
on a bed; it’s a tad bit easier on a hard surface but I still
can’t go up and down more than about 4 times. I find this
very embarrassing, and while I myself don’t particularly
enjoy this position I feel like I should relieve my partner
of at least some of the exhaustion of sex. So, how do I
practice riding at home? Is it squats or what? I’d be super
grateful for any advice! Cheers to you!”
Answers:
1) Riding a man doesn’t involve the active use of legs.
Some involve the active use of legs, some don’t at all. If
you’re squatting on your feet, then yeah, that’s exhausting for your legs. But if you’re straddling, knees and feet
on the bed, then you’re mostly using your hips; the legs
are simply there to keep you balanced.
2) I can’t speak for all men but I prefer the “knees down/
straddle” more than the “vertical squat.” The latter looks
hot in porn but it doesn’t feel as good as the straddle.
3) I would definitely suggest being in a kneeling position
as opposed to a squating position, if you are not already
doing it this way.
Sexology
107
4) Like this you can alternate between sitting back and
kneeling. It is still going to be some work, but much easier
than doing squats during sex.
Suggestion: 5) Straddle him with your knees on the bed
and your chest on his chest. With this position, his hands
can hold your butt and he can bounce your ass when you
are tired. With this position he can comfortably fuck you
from behind.
6) If you want to sit on the dick, you can kneel while sitting
on it or hold your feet tightly on his sides. This position
allows you to twerk effortlessly on the dick.
7)You can use his chest as support by holding onto it or
you sit on the dick and hold his leg with one of your hands.
108
Sexology
Chapter 10
How to ride him.
1)
Make sure that you are sitting comfortably.
This point is really important. Not only do you need to be
comfortable so you can enjoy maximum pleasure, but you
need to make sure you don’t hurt him. When you climb on
top, take good care of the position of your hips and make
sure that you place your legs in a position that you will
feel comfortable in for a while. Of course, you don’t need
to make it obvious to him that you are figuring out which
position is the best for comfort. You can do it subtly. You
also don’t need to put too much pressure on finding the
best position, because you can always change it if it gets
uncomfortable.
Sexology
109
2)When you are ready, it might help if you guide the tip of
your man’s penis into you.
Whilst you do this, you can enjoy being in control and
tease his penis against your wet vagina. Once he is inside
you, and you can tell that you are both feeling comfortable, you are good to start riding – you go cowgirl! Make
sure you don’t get so excited with the new moves that his
penis accidentally falls out of you – this could be painful
and could even bend his penis if you land on it badly.
3. Stare into his eyes.
Once you are riding your man, there a still a few things
that you need to be thinking about. The first one is the fact
that you should keep eye contact with him. Whether you
are having sex with someone you are deeply in love with
or you are having a one-night stand, sex is an intimate act.
It’s crucial to hold eye contact with
your man.
Eye contact not only makes everything sexier, but it allows you and your man to have a deep mental connection
while you are connected in other physical ways. It can
110
Sexology
also be really satisfying to watch how your movements
can control the way your man looks at you. For example,
if you’re bringing him to climax, he might stare into your
eyes deeply, or his eyes might even roll backwards. Whatever happens, eye contact is key.
4) Overwhelm all his senses.
You are in charge, so you need to make sure you are not
only enjoying yourself, but you are giving your man a great
time too. If you are on top, of course, he will be loving it already. However, there are a few things that will make you
both feel much more pleasure.
Throughout having sex, you should still be kissing him. As
much as he will be enjoying you bouncing up and down
on him, if he can feel your lips on his from time to time, it
will give him such an amazing sensation. Kissing is also a
really romantic thing to do, so it can turn the act of having
sex into a passionate act of lovemaking.
You should also caress his body while you are riding him. If
he can feel you all over his body, he will go crazy. This can
be anything from running your hands up his chest, or gently grabbing his thighs. If you hold his thighs, it can also
Sexology
111
be useful for your balance or will give you a little bit more
strength if you start to feel tired
You can lean your chest down on to his and let him feel
your breasts against his skin. He might also feel invited to
caress your breasts or your waist when you do this. If you
know that he is especially attracted to breasts, he will love
that you are doing this.
While you lean down to be closer to him, you can whisper things in his ear. Obviously, don’t start asking how his
day was or what his plans are for tomorrow – talk dirty to
him. Tell him how good it feels to be on top of him or tell
him what you want to do to him. You will be stimulating his
mind as well as his penis.
The final thing you can do is make sure that you smell nice.
You could maybe add a splash of perfume on, and he will
go crazy over your sweet scent.
5. Try to move your hips around in a circle.
The in and out motion is great and will work well for pretty much everyone that does this position. However, men
love it when you change it up a little bit. So, if you feel like
you have been bouncing up and down for a little while, it
might be a great idea to change your style
112
Sexology
Start to circle your hips round and round. Imagine that
you are trying to feel his penis in every single corner of
you. Really grind all over him. Enjoy it, slowly use circular
motions with your hips. He will be able to feel that he is
going deep inside of you, and it will probably bring him to
climax faster than before. It will also probably feel better
for you. If you are doing this, it’s important to say that you
should use slow strokes. If you move fast while you try to
do this, you might hurt him.
6. Change up the pace.
You should alternate between riding slow and riding fast.
If you try to ride him fast the whole time, you will tire yourself out very quickly. On the other hand, if you don’t pick
up the speed at all, it will take a long time for both of you
to climax
Start off slowly moving up and down on his penis, and you
will be able to sense from him what he enjoys. If he grabs
your hips and tries to move you up and down at a faster pace than you are going, go with it and start to move
faster. Once you have been moving fast for a while, start
to slow down the pace and start moving your hips round.
Sexology
113
This will also be really useful for you to take a breather if
you do feel out of breath or tired.
Keep alternating between a slow pace and a fast pace.
When you feel like you are both going to climax, pick the
speed up to a faster pace than you have ever done. Fingers crossed, this technique of changing the pace will not
only let your sex last longer, but you should also finish together.
7. Turn around while riding him.
This really depends on whether you and your partner are
into trying new positions, but it could be a really great
idea to turn around and then start to ride him again. If he
is a man who appreciates ass, this will also turn him on.
You can choose whether you want to go straight into this
position, or you want to ride him frontwards first.
Ride your man facing him at first, just so you can sustain
good eye contact and start to feel more confident and
comfortable with each other. Once you are having a great
time, you can get off. He might look upset that you’ve got
off him – but he doesn’t know what is happening next.
Before you turn around, it might be much appreciated by
114
Sexology
him if you slide down and give him a blowjob. This will also
keep his penis hard, and make it lubricated and ready to
slide in. Then, turn around and lower yourself on to him
(always using your hand to guide his penis into you).
Just start riding him like you were before. This position
might be really helpful to you if you are a little bit self-conscious about showing facial expressions or letting your
breasts giggle around.
In this position, you can also rub your clit while bouncing
around on him. As well as this, he will most likely grab your
ass while you ride and it will feel great.
8. Do what makes you feel good.
As selfish as this sounds, it must be said. Not only are you
going to be feeling confident and empowered during this
position, but it is probably one of the only positions that
place the woman in power. You can use your body and
make yourself feel good.
If he is normally on top you might not get as much satisfaction from him than you actually need or want. In this
position, you can use his penis to make you feel good. I’m
sure you will be focusing on the person that you are having
sex with, especially if it is your partner. However, it might
Sexology
115
actually be a good idea to just think of it like they’re just
an object of your pleasure. If you feel like you need to, you
can climax before he does, and then work on him. He will
probably take more time to climax anyway, so you most
likely be able to orgasm more than once.
Men also love it when you take control and make yourself
feel good, with them. He will get off on the fact that you
are having such a good time and feeling so much pleasure.
The chances are that whatever makes you feel good, will
also make him feel good.
9. Communicate with him.
Just because you are the one in control, doesn’t mean
that he doesn’t have to do any work. For you to both have
great sex, you both need to put in the effort. Everyone is
different when they have sex, so it’s important to understand what works for you both when you are together. You
can simply ask him what makes him feel good.
Most men like it when their woman is vocal during sex because it shows that you are having a great time and he is
providing that. So, you can ask him if he likes it when you
moan and groan. If he does, make a point of being vocal
during your steamy session.
116
Sexology
You could also ask him if he wants to go deeper inside you.
If he does, you can simply pop a pillow under his ass or get
him to bend his legs rather than laying flat. This will give
you deeper penetration, leaving you both feeling maximum pleasure.
You could also ask him if he likes anything a little bit kinkier, or he has any fantasies that he wants to play out with
you. If he does, he will feel open to expressing them, because you have opened up the conversation and shown
him that you are happy to try something new. Some men
will really enjoy being dominated, and if they do, this position is great to make him feel in submission.
Have fun with it and don’t think too much.
One of the most important things when it comes to sex is
that you should be both having fun. Unless you want it to
be a very serious lovemaking session, there should always
be some giggles and mess-ups. Nothing in life is perfect,
and so sex shouldn’t have to be either. Even though all
these tips will help you to ride your man like the cowgirl
you are, it might not always go how you wanted it to. Don’t
beat yourself up if things go wrong or neither of you are
Sexology
117
feeling the way that you want to be feeling. Like I said earlier, everyone’s sexual preferences are different, so just
do what feels good for the two of you. If something doesn’t
feel good, change it up.
If you put too much pressure on riding perfectly, your man
might notice that you aren’t fully letting go and allowing
yourself to enjoy your time with him. This will probably
lead to him being turned off. No one wants to have sex
with someone who is very serious and looks too occupied
with the details of the matter. Your man will want you to
enjoy yourself, so do.
So, let yourself go. Take all of the tips in this article and
make it your own. Be confident in what you’re doing, and
don’t act self-consciously. Men find it a real turn on when
women take control and know what they want in the bedroom. Of course, you want to ride your man well, but it
shouldn’t be your main focus. Your focus should be on
pleasing yourself and your man.
Sex should be anything but boring and monotonous, so
this position is a great way to spice things up in the bedroom. However, if you find that you have become a pro at
118
Sexology
riding your man after lots of practice, it might be time to
move on to some other positions. Have fun with it
How Do You Ride A Man Perfectly?
Once you are on top, assume a comfortable and safe position that won’t hurt your man. Without putting all your
body weight on him, begin moving your body in ways that
bring pleasure to you, chances are, if you feel good, he
may feel great as well.
How Can A Man Get Better In Bed?
Sex involves two people, and sometimes it can get boring
fast if you’re doing the same thing every day. Try doing
some sexy research together with your partner, and collectively figure out what both of you would like to try. Also,
try to set the moment long before it happens, flirty text
messages and foreplay should do the trick.
How Do You Ride A Guy Without Getting Tired?
Sex is all about passion, and sometimes, overthinking it
could take away from the fun and ecstasy of it. However, to
spice things up, try to get creative with different positions
and places other than the bedroom, but most importantly,
communicate with your partner on what gets them on.
Sexology
119
1
120
Sexology
A
A
Maria recalled her sex with her boyfriend when she was in
college. It was just a perfect definition of horrifying. It was bad. No
pleasure. All pain. She agreed it was that bad because it was her
first time. But the second, third, sixth time where the same. She
still felt that pain every time her lover wanted to penetrate. Her
boobs would get all sore. She had to endure the pain and pretend
to be enjoying the mad thrusts just to boast his ego. She believed
she probably had a problem or God was punishing her because
she was having premarital sex. But even after she got married to
Alex, she still could not enjoy it. All she does was watch Alex enjoy
himself on top of her and wished she could feel what he was
feeling even for just five seconds.
2
Sexology
121
Another surveyor, Stassie could not understand what some ladies
meant by sex not being sweet. She said; “It is Ecstatic and insane!
The best feeling in the whole world. The penetration, thrusting,
the head, biting is all great.” She maintained she always look
forward to having sex.
3
122
Sexology
When your body and mind are
in sync during sex, you have
mad fun, your partner even
have madder fun.
4
Sexology
123
We had 279,638 sexually active women tell us their sex
experiences. We have always known the sex world is not a good
place for women but we never expected it to be that bad either.
75% of our surveyors have never had a good experience with sex.
Their experience is summed up in three sentences below;
1) Everything they heard or imagined about sex is a lie because
they found no pleasure in it.
2) After the whole sex hype and porn moans( for those that watch
porn) they still didn’t enjoy shit...
5
124
Sexology
3) 2/3 percent of the surveyors mentioned they have had
pleasurable sex and also had ones that were terrible. “It depends
on the guy”. There are some guys that are great at fucking while
some really suck too bad.” Tessy said amidst laughter.
4) I have had sex more than ten times but it still hurts super bad
each time my lover is about to penetrate. (This should be number
one or highlighted)
My husband just stares at me whenever I give him a blow job.
Sometimes he would tell me to stop.
6
Sexology
125
Is sexual intercourse enjoyable?
It can be, on a 100% level of
pleasure if;
Maria is sadly 70% of women while Stassie is 2%.
Is sexual intercourse enjoyable? It can be, on a 100% level of
pleasure if;
1) You have a Great Top( The good news is you can be the
captain of your top)
2) if you are mentally ALL IN for it. I know you have probably
7
126
Sexology
heard about being mentally all in for sex. It is not a hypothesis
neither is it a cliche, it’s a real ass deal. It is an Aphrodite. If you
get it sucked in, you will be swimming in an ocean of pleasure.
“The brain is a more powerful sexual organ than genitalia,
because it’s where sex drive stems from,
When you are not mentally prepared, your body won’t be
relaxed, your muscles tighten. You just have to learn to release
your body. Your brain can make you tighten all the muscles in
your body, making you stiff. This stiffness makes penetration to
be a nightmare.
Women and men react differently to sex. You have got to want
to be into the art before you can enjoy it’s fullness. Stop using
sex enhancers to make the man enjoy it alone. Or finding a
thousand ways to be wet for your man. All these preparation
processes are great but the first and most prioritized process
is to GET INTO IT MENTALLY. there are far too many factors that
would hinder your full body’s full participation.
1) From your upbringing.
2) To religious beliefs
3) To insecurities about your body
4) To expectations.
8
Sexology
127
All these forms a roadblock in your head which cause your body
not to relax. During sex, focus on your partner that is in front of
you and be in the moment. If they are on top of you, be rubbing
their back and head gently and also use every love making
moment to tell them how much you love them and admire their
body( The man should do this more).
Forget all you think you are doing wrong. Clear the exceptions
you have formed from watching pornography. Know that porn
is an act. Most of it are staged and magnified to appeal to the
senses. The heavy pounding and rimming done in most porn
videos are not pleasurable in real life and should not be the
9
128
Sexology
standard you and your partner use to have or enjoy sex. When
your body and mind are in sync during sex, you will have mad
fun and your partner even have madder fun.
Secondly If your partner;
1) smells
2) Bad with kissing
3) Bad with sucking your boobs
4) Doesn’t like foreplay or bad at it
10
Sexology
129
Especially the sucking boobs part or generally someone who
doesn’t like foreplay and wants to get into it immediately, you
might not find sex pleasurable.
If your man is an egotistical being who wouldn’t appreciate your
honest feedback or want you both to discuss the art of love
making, you will be in big trouble. 80% of men automatically
assume they are good in bed when in fact it’s the opposite. And
most often than not, they make these assumptions because
their women had told them they were great in bed when in fact
they sucked too bad. From our survey, some of these women
said they tell their man that for their self esteem. No love, what
about your sexual pleasure? You are also entitled to an orgasm!
Solution: communication is everything. It is important to have
these conversations with your partners. You need to learn
how to playfully pass on a message to your partner. You can
playfully tell them that their breath smells. The bedroom game
on the last chapter helps expose to your partner their sex flaws
without you breaking your head on how to tell them.
11
130
Sexology
Then here comes the killer punch!
The hard and swift penetrations and Pounding! Most men believe
that hard pounding is the key to great sex. And most ladies would
rather lie through the silly-ness or even fake moan when they
were actually feeling pains in their vagina. If your man does not
know how to gently ease into you and you are too scared to
communicate with him (which is a bad thing) You should take the
wheel from whatever position you are in. Even if he is on top of
12
Sexology
131
you. Tell him to stop the penetration and let you do it. Gently lift
your waist up and position his dick directly to your vagina. Please
make sure his dick is well lubricated before you try to take it in
NOTE: If penetration still gives you discomfort or pains.
Always make sure to use Lubricants. Silicone based lubricants
and oil based lubricants last longer than water based
lubricants. Water based lubricants dries up in seconds unlike
silicone based or oil based lubricants. Do not use oil based
lubricants on a condom. It destroys the condom. A common
water based lubricant is KY Jelly. The bad news is that it dries
fast. Coconut Oil is a great sex lubricant. You can use it to oil
your Lover’s dick so well before easing it in your vagina. Wet
platinum silicone based sex lube, Vagisil Prohydrate Silicone
based sex lube, Astroglide X, Premium waterproof silicone
lubricant are all great Silicone based lubricants out there.
Silicone based lubes last longer than Oil based lubes and
helps make sex easier than oil.
13
132
Sexology
SEX MOANS
While engaging in foreplay with your partner and you are
enjoying what they are doing to your body, make sure to make a
sound that will let them know that you are enjoying it. Moaning
combined with sweet compliments gets your body excited. It
might be a simple compliment like, “Yeah baby. I love that so
much.” Moaning and throwing out sweet compliments during
foreplay or sex magically sets the mood and your body. You will
be amazed on how confident and wet you will become when your
man moans loudly when you’re giving him blow job or riding him.
Do not lie like a wood and be silent like an earthworm. Neither
should your Man.
14
Sexology
133
HOW TO MAKE HIM SCREAM
1) Oil up his dick with a sex lubricant. Massage the dick for
some minutes, applying lubricant each minute. Hold the shaft
of the penis and give it a thorough hand job. Do not touch the
head of the dick. This process sends bolts of pleasure to the
head. Focus on the shaft for five minutes before gently siting on
the tip of the dick. When you sit on the tip, tighten your vagina
around it and move up and down slowly.
2) The method up is how you can gently ease into a dick and
it would not cause you any discomfort. Apply lots of lubricant.
15
134
Sexology
Do not think you are wet. You might be wet on the outside but
inside your vagina is not.
3) While giving him a blow job, neglect the tip of the dick for
some seconds, focus on the shaft so the pleasure builds up on
the tip. After few minutes, go up to the tip and suck on it. NOTE:
DO NOT LET YOUR TEETH DUG IN ON THE DICK. Be very careful
while giving a head
4) Always milk his cum. Whenever your man is cuming, hold
the tip of his penis with your hand and keep stroking it till
every last drop of cum is gone. If he is cuming in your vagina,
make sure to continue the thrusting as he cums. Cuming is
more pleasurable when the dick is stroked or humped on. If he
stopped humping you because he was about to cum, do not
let him do that. Keep on thrusting from whatever position you
are in while holding him tightly till every last drop of his cum is
gone.
16
Sexology
135
LOVE MAKING ETIQUETTE
1. Time of love making is not the time to think about your problems
2. Do not let your mind focus on; what your religion believes, what your parents
would think, what the community thinks and what your partner will be
thinking of your body (Always be confident of your body shape when you are
naked, even if the body shape you currently have is not close to what you
want).
3. ALWAYS shamelessly moan and give sweet talks to your lover during sex. These
two acts set the mood for both of you. and the mood sets your bodies on sex
fire.
4. Make sure to be clean and smell nice.
5. Lubricants is a lady’s best friend.
6. Massaging your partners body when they are on top of you, gently nibbing
their ears, grabbing their butts and touching their chests during missionary
position.
17
136
Sexology
CLIT FUCKING
Clitorial orgasm is a form of orgasm every lady CAN experience. It
does not matter if you are circumcised or not, the clit area is still
filled with pleasurable nerves that sets the lady on pleasure fire.
There are different ways your partner can make love to your clitoris.
It is as insane and great as when a guy is cuming. Clitoral orgasm
can even be more intense than the one felt by men when they cum
and you can have more than ten in a day if you want to. There is no
limit to it.
1. Pour a sizeable lubricant on your clit when you are lying down.
Let your lover massage it gently with his dick till you cum.
2. When both of you are standing up, let him position his dick to
your clit as seen in the picture above and then gently thrust on it
continuously.
3. While making love to you, he should choose a sex style that will
allow him massage your clitoris with his hands while he fucks
you.
4. During foreplay, he should use enough lubricant and massage
your clitoris or be massaging it while giving you head.
18
Sexology
137
Bedroom games.
If your partner is good, you award one
point. If they are in the middle or bad, you
award zero. Zero points come with bowl
of punishment. Choose any on the list of
punishment and do it.
19
138
Sexology
You can skip a question if you both don’t engage in them
1) How good a kisser is your lover?
2) Are they good with blow job?
3) Is he great at sucking your boobs?
4) Are they a moaner or a silencer?
5) How often does he give you head?
6) Do you enjoy giving her head?
7) How good or terrible do they smell down there?
8) Do you look forward to kissing them immediately or you rather
they brush their mouth?
9) How beautiful is their dick penetration?
10) Are they a pounder or a love maker?
11) Is the sex good or bad or in between?
12) Does she know how to take charge on bed?
13) Do they initiate sex?
14) Do you want them to initiate sex?
Bowl of Punishment
Give a five minutes lap massage.
Nimble their ears for ten seconds
Use your tongue and lick the clitoris for five minutes
Swallow the full length of their dick, hold for some seconds before
releasing.
5Pour Yoghurt or drink on the top of the dick or boobd and lick it
off
20
Sexology
139
6) Cuddle your partner for one minute, gently rubbing their head
while cuddling.
7) Give a five minutes dick massage
8) If she has never rode your dick, make her do it tonight.
9) Wrap yourselves on the bed and kiss for five minutes, fumbling
her boobs gently. (Note; the boobs are meant to be sucked gently
and licked on with your tongue. Avoid squeezing too tight or
sucking too tight)
10) Dare do a 360° with she sucking your dick and you sucking her
clitoris..
11) Use massage oil and give her a five minutes clitoris massage
while telling her how much you like her.
21
140
Sexology
More Explicit sex positions:
Exists in Pictures no words.
We have a gallery of over 100 erotic sex
positions you can watch privately and
try with your partner in pictorial form
only. It is too Explicit we can’t have it on
this ebook. If you want to have it,
click here to Purchase.
Sexology
141
References
1. Women’s Health Magazine. www.womenshealthmag.
com
2. Bad Girls Bible. www.badgirlsbible.com
3. www.themix.org.uk
4. www.mensjournal.com
5. Xinvaya Studio
Illustrations and pictures
1)
Playboy Magazine
2)
https://instagram.com/_michael-
draws?igshid=9u4e91yadvw4
142
Sexology
For personal questions and
concerns send a message to;
Instagram: @xinvayastudio
Email: xinvayastudio@gmail.com
Sexology
143
144
Sexology